sparkling husband primitive a packrat

[franksolich]

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=403x2652

Oh my.

The sparkling husband primitive shows up about midway through this bonfire, coming out of the bathroom in the basement, buttoning his trousers:

InvisibleTouch  (1000+ posts)     Tue Mar-17-09 11:58 PM
Original message

Collectors: when/how do you say goodbye?

This is my dilemma - I have an extensive collection of items that I've gathered over the course of some 20 years, literally and figuratively scouring the globe for them. Some pieces are fairly valuable (or were, before the market went to hell), while others are precious to no one but me. More than the items themselves, the collection represents a whole era of my life, complete with drama, trauma, and passionate interaction with other collectors, both in a positive and a negative sense.

But, the era is over. I've known it for a few years now, and just hated to acknowledge it. Sure, I have my very favorite pieces on display, but the rest is packed away in boxes upon boxes, perhaps never to see the light of day again. I keep telling myself that some day when I have a big house with lots of spare rooms, that whole collection will be re-exhumed and lavishly displayed. But who knows when or if that will be?

Meanwhile, I drastically need the space, and sure could use the income if I just sold the stuff. It galls me that I wouldn't get much for it at this point in time, but I also feel like I need to free myself from the coils of the past. On the other hand I see myself a few years down the road (perhaps with that big house with the many spare rooms), kicking myself hard for selling any single piece of the set. Right now I might be feeling restless, but later? Later I might get nostalgic for that collector's era, complete with all of its good and bad memories.

So, has anyone ever been in a situation like this? Did you come to a point where you finally said, "I'm going to sell it all, and use the income to finance a new path in life"? Did you regret it later? Or were you, like me, simply unable to let go?

Vinca  (1000+ posts)      Wed Mar-18-09 08:16 AM
Response to Original message
 
1. I've always thought if you can't make up your mind about something, t's best to do nothing at all. If it's not in your way and you're not eating cat food to survive, leave it in the boxes. You'll know when it's time to let go.

yy4me  (1000+ posts)      Wed Mar-18-09 08:21 AM
Response to Original message
 
2. I am in the exact same predicament. After collecting "stuff" for years and spending 25 years in the antiques business, I now face the problem of what to do with the things I have accumulated. Since I am now a widow, I have lost my enthusiasm for traveling all over the place(alone) looking for goodies. I still stop at every antiques shop I see but my business has been closed since the mid-90's. Space is not my problem, I have no boxes of goodies in the attic but there are things I have that are of no interest to my children.

One is a very large silver tea service that I hope to consign with a very nice jewelry store near me. No-one wants to lay out money at the moment but this store has a wealthy customer base. I hope they find my consignment proposition to their liking, I haven't gone yet. I can't advertise it and will never find a dealer who could pay me for it. Things are tough in the business right now. I still keep in touch with former competition and they tell me this is the case. ...That is, if they are still in business.

The things I have are of no great value, no real expensive stuff, just old goodies that are pleasing to me and have an interesting story to me or to my late husband. It is funny but I worry where this stuff will go when I'm no longer here to relive the times when we picked up "whatever".

I may forget what I had for breakfast but I remember where I got everything and how much I paid for it. Once it gets into your system, it never goes away.

grasswire  (1000+ posts)      Thu Mar-19-09 02:08 AM
Response to Reply #2
 
4. you probably could make that determination now

Maybe you could find someone or some place to will the goodies where they would be admired, observed, cared for. Someone who is a true-hearted collector. Maybe someone who can't afford to collect. It might be possible to find someone who would listen to the stories and love the stuff. A young neighbor perhaps, or a shirt tail relative -- someone who shows an interest in old things.

Think how much like a Hallmark movie it would be for someone to be willed a treasure chest of old things. This has set me thinking about what to do with my 12,000 pieces of sheet music, thousands of postcards, and stuff. I do know a girl who has the eye and the interest in old things. I might "hire" her to come and help me sort for a couple of afternoons and see what her level of interest is.

The sparkling husband primitive:

Stinky The Clown  (1000+ posts)        Wed Mar-18-09 10:38 PM
Response to Original message
 
3. I share your dilemma

I have yet to unburden myself of anything.

A few years ago, Sparkly let go of something. Months later, she actually cried about it.

You never know. Yes, it is just 'stuff' ..... but it is your stuff and has your memories associated with it.

Keep it. You won't be sorry.

InvisibleTouch  (1000+ posts)     Thu Mar-19-09 09:13 PM
Response to Reply #3
 
5. I did actually sell most of a previous collection...

...with the exception of my favorite pieces, and have not regretted it. I needed the money and the space, and I realized that just getting rid of the objects didn't change my love for the concept or the good memories attached to it. This current set, though, has a lot more history and emotion wrapped up in it. So that's what makes it difficult.

If I knew for sure that I would never at any point in the future have display space for it, I would probably go ahead and sell it. What good is it to me in boxes? As it is, though, I keep hoping circumstances will change, so I'm still on the fence. Ah well.

sandnsea  (1000+ posts)      Thu Apr-02-09 03:52 AM
Response to Original message
 
6. Is it a mistake worth making

Which mistake will you be glad you made. Selling it and financing that new path. Or having the collection twenty years from now.

If the new path doesn't work out, will it be a mistake you're glad you made.

If you don't set out on that new path, will keeping the collection be a mistake you're glad you made in your old age.

That's how I try to make decisions. I've made lots of mistakes and lots of decisions that didn't work out over the years. But most of them are what I call "my life", and include wonderful people and opportunities that I'd have never engaged in otherwise. So now I'm okay with those mistakes.

Which mistake would you be more okay with?

KoKo  (1000+ posts)      Sat Apr-04-09 06:44 PM
Response to Reply #6
 
7. I don't know your age group...but things go in cycles...

What was yesterday's "trash" somehow becomes prized to a newer generation. With our new attitude of self-sufficiency in the coming years after The Crash it's hard to know what will come from whatever the market is for collectibles of the past.

It's hard to imagine a new generation wanting a beautiful sterling tea set to use...but maybe there will be other uses for that and other collectibles.

Maybe the lead and toxins in all the stuff from "Crate & Barrel" wedding gifts will be tossed in favor of real porcelain and pottery without toxic glazes from an earlier era. It's possible that even the furniture that you bring home and put together that emit toxic fumes will be abandoned for "remakes" of real wood storage pieces from years past because they are already "gassed out" of fumes from the paints and glues.

We don't know what a new Post Bush/Clinton era will be...but there are folks already thinking we need to go back to "basics" and while much from our past might seem worthless right now...we don't know if this might not be the "hottest thing" for future speculation.

Just saying...but watching the trends for many years...these cycles come and go. The "throw away..buy new from Crate & Barrel or Wall Mart years" of Bush and Clinton Second Term might just be an anomaly in what we as a civilization value.

We might need to hold on a little longer. Just like those of us who still have some bad stuff in our 401-K's if we were unfortunate enough to be forced to have one...for some things to sort out.

But, if one needs to get some money then it's like rearranging things. Financially if we need to "fire sale" some collectible to give us some room to breath...then it's probably worth it, circumstantially.

These are hard times to know how to maneuver... Sometimes better to hold, sometimes better to foldand sometimes better to back away and wait.

The AdBot primitive disappointed me; when I came to the end of the bonfire, I was expecting to see an advertisement for psychotherapy services treating compulsive-possessive disorder.

[happy1ga]

Collectors, or horders?

[thundley4]

Why did none of them mention what their collections were, are they ashamed of them?  I guess those bong collections and empty Cheetos wrapper have more sentimental value than real value.

[USA4ME]

Why did none of them mention what their collections were, are they ashamed of them?  I guess those bong collections and empty Cheetos wrapper have more sentimental value than real value.

 

I was gong to say that the InvisibleTouch touch primitive collects rolling papers, but your answer is probably more accurate.

.

[BannedFromDU]

Collectors, or horders?

     Once in a while you get a glimpse into how these people live, and it's disgusting. This guy is describing a mental illness, not a "collection." Stuff you keep in a display box is called a "collection." Stuff you keep in boxes stacked floor to ceiling is called "shit." I can just see his hovel now...shit everywhere, cluttering every room, windows blocked, lights burned out, stacks of old newspapers everywhere, a landscape of dirty glasses and fast food cups on every flat surface...ugh. Sick.

[delilahmused]

     Once in a while you get a glimpse into how these people live, and it's disgusting. This guy is describing a mental illness, not a "collection." Stuff you keep in a display box is called a "collection." Stuff you keep in boxes stacked floor to ceiling is called "shit." I can just see his hovel now...shit everywhere, cluttering every room, windows blocked, lights burned out, stacks of old newspapers everywhere, a landscape of dirty glasses and fast food cups on every flat surface...ugh. Sick.

Well that depends. Before I had kids I had a beautiful collection of antique dolls (the kind with porcelain heads). Then I had boys. The velocity with which a baseball can sail through porcelain is simply breathtaking. After I lost a few to various sporting equipment, casualties of wrestling (silly me I used to think all wrestling occurred on the floor well away from delicate things), Karate kicks, and boys simply breathing in a room with breakable things, I put them away. I have them back out on display now, though.

Cindie

[BlueStateSaint]

Well that depends. Before I had kids I had a beautiful collection of antique dolls (the kind with porcelain heads). Then I had boys. The velocity with which a baseball can sail through porcelain is simply breathtaking. After I lost a few to various sporting equipment, casualties of wrestling (silly me I used to think all wrestling occurred on the floor well away from delicate things), Karate kicks, and boys simply breathing in a room with breakable things, I put them away. I have them back out on display now, though.

Cindie

And now, one of those boys is breaking things for a living, in the US Marines . . .  

[franksolich]

The one primitive I know in real life, a primitive in Omaha but who posts on Skins's island as if she lives in California, is a real piece of work when it comes to hoarding things.

She's in her late 30s, about 250 pounds, and subsists on social security "disability" due to "depression."  Single, had two cats.  The last time I saw her, so as to be kind to the cats, I changed the litter box, which obviously hadn't been changed for weeks.

I'm a nice guy.

This was about four years ago; the cats have since gone away.

Anyway, she lives in a subsidized apartment crammed floor-to-rafters with "things;" there's a couch and some chairs in the living room, but one can't use them because they're piled with things.  There's a table and chairs in the kitchen, but one can use them because they're piled with things.  She lives in her bedroom, on a waterbed, with telephone and television and computer within arm's-reach.  The bedroom has more things in it, than air.

The only time she ventures out is the day her check is deposited into the bank; then she gussies up, and heads right for Wal-Mart, and spends it all on more things.

[happy1ga]

I remember about 10 yrs ago I saw a special on Discovery about horders. I had never even heard of people like this. They were saving crap like used bandaids, hairballs from the shower drain, used food wrappers, etc. Some were not quite as weird in their collection items, but all of them were past the edge of normality. I am like Cindie, a regular collector.I collect Hollie Hobbie items from the 70's. I had a ton from my childhood, and then decided I would buy a few things, and it grew into a collection. The difference is, it is no longer a collection, but a mental illness when you can't move around your house for all the shit everywhere. I did think it was odd no one over there mentioned even once exactly what it was they collected. Used soap,perhaps?