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Author Topic: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home  (Read 4249 times)

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Offline bijou

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Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« on: February 09, 2009, 11:52:06 AM »
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Australians have renamed a street "Dildo Boulevard" after 30 sex toys were found lying in front of a house on Friday morning.

Robert Johns and Laurelle Bates sex toys on the way to work in the morning.

"It's a real mystery. We have no idea where they came from," Ms Bates told The Northern Territory News.

"I know they aren't new. They look used."

Mr Johns said some of the dildos had disappeared over the day.

"Yeah, some of the bigger ones are gone," he said. ...
link
This is so wrong in so many ways. :puke:
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Offline Wretched Excess

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #1 on: February 09, 2009, 11:57:28 AM »

the only thing that surprises me about this story is that it didn't happen in florida.



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Offline jtyangel

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #2 on: February 09, 2009, 11:58:46 AM »
Doesn't the 'don't touch, you don't know where that's been rule' mean anything to anybody?  :thatsright:
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Offline Wineslob

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #3 on: February 09, 2009, 12:15:36 PM »
Quote
Yeah, some of the bigger ones are gone," he said. ...







 :rotf:
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Offline asdf2231

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #4 on: February 09, 2009, 12:18:07 PM »
We can always count on Bijou to cram a stimulating topic into the lounge every day! :-)
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Offline thundley4

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #5 on: February 09, 2009, 12:18:53 PM »
And they appeared USED.
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Offline Chris_

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #6 on: February 09, 2009, 12:25:41 PM »
Quote from: thundley4 on February 09, 2009, 12:18:53 PM
And they appeared USED.
We really don't need the specifics.   Ewwwww.
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Offline Splashdown

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #7 on: February 09, 2009, 12:32:21 PM »
A lady of obvious culture walks rather shyly into a sex toys store to buy something for her self.

"How much is that one there?" She asks?

"10 bucks," the clerk says.

"How about that huge one there?" she inquires.

"That's 25 dollars," the clerk responds.

"Ooooooooooooooh. How much for that giant plaid one right there on the counter?" She asks breathlessly.

"That one? It's fifty dollars," The clerk says.

"I'll take it!"

A short time later, the manager walks in and asks the clerk how sales are going that day.

"Pretty slow," he said, "But I DID sell my thermos to a lady for 50 bucks."

As I had no good puns, I figured a sex toy joke would work instead.
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Offline Miss Mia

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #8 on: February 09, 2009, 12:38:02 PM »
Quote from: jtyangel on February 09, 2009, 11:58:46 AM
Doesn't the 'don't touch, you don't know where that's been rule' mean anything to anybody?  :thatsright:

Especially since it "appeared most were used."  Ewww. 
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Offline Miss Mia

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #9 on: February 09, 2009, 12:38:16 PM »
Quote from: Splashdown on February 09, 2009, 12:32:21 PM
A lady of obvious culture walks rather shyly into a sex toys store to buy something for her self.

"How much is that one there?" She asks?

"10 bucks," the clerk says.

"How about that huge one there?" she inquires.

"That's 25 dollars," the clerk responds.

"Ooooooooooooooh. How much for that giant plaid one right there on the counter?" She asks breathlessly.

"That one? It's fifty dollars," The clerk says.

"I'll take it!"

A short time later, the manager walks in and asks the clerk how sales are going that day.

"Pretty slow," he said, "But I DID sell my thermos to a lady for 50 bucks."

As I had no good puns, I figured a sex toy joke would work instead.


LOL!
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Stink Eye
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Offline thundley4

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #10 on: February 09, 2009, 12:40:41 PM »
Since this was was Australia, would this be considered a sex toy?


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Offline Chris_

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #11 on: February 09, 2009, 12:43:00 PM »
Quote from: thundley4 on February 09, 2009, 12:40:41 PM
Since this was was Australia, would this be considered a sex toy?



Only for a perv from Florida...in his car.
 :-)
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Offline bijou

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #12 on: February 09, 2009, 01:28:05 PM »
Quote from: asdf2231 on February 09, 2009, 12:18:07 PM
We can always count on Bijou to cram a stimulating topic into the lounge every day! :-)
I like to do my bit to ensure the Lounge is buzzing.  :-)
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Offline Wineslob

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #13 on: February 09, 2009, 02:13:32 PM »
I wonder if they have the problem in hand yet?
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“The national budget must be balanced. The public debt must be reduced; the arrogance of the authorities must be moderated and controlled. Payments to foreign governments must be reduced, if the nation doesn't want to go bankrupt. People must again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance.”

        -- Marcus Tullius Cicero, 55 BC (106-43 BC)

The unobtainable is unknown at Zombo.com



"Practice random violence and senseless acts of brutality"

If you want a gender neutral bathroom, go pee in the forest.

Offline asdf2231

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #14 on: February 09, 2009, 02:17:54 PM »
Quote from: bijou on February 09, 2009, 01:28:05 PM
I like to do my bit to ensure the Lounge is buzzing.  :-)

You definitely do your part to fill the gaps.

Some of your posts are a little dry and turged sometimes but once they get going they move pretty slick.

Sometimes a little ribbing from the crowd helps things out.

:-)
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Offline bijou

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #15 on: February 09, 2009, 02:20:04 PM »
Quote from: asdf2231 on February 09, 2009, 02:17:54 PM
You definitely do your part to fill the gaps.

Some of your posts are a little dry and turged sometimes but once they get going they move pretty slick.

Sometimes a little ribbing from the crowd helps things out.

:-)
With all the talk of stimulus these days, I thought you guys could do with some relief.
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Offline asdf2231

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #16 on: February 09, 2009, 02:44:58 PM »
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Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #17 on: February 09, 2009, 02:55:52 PM »
Nothing like some girth and merriment to shorten the day.
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Offline Wretched Excess

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #18 on: February 09, 2009, 02:57:30 PM »

I am still mulling over the phrase "plague of mystery dildos" . . . those three words just don't belong in the same sentence. :-)

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Offline debk

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #19 on: February 09, 2009, 03:55:24 PM »
No longer needed.....EB was seen lounging down at the corner pub.....

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Offline asdf2231

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #20 on: February 09, 2009, 06:49:27 PM »
Quote from: Wretched Excess on February 09, 2009, 02:57:30 PM
I am still mulling over the phrase "plague of mystery dildos" . . . those three words just don't belong in the same sentence. :-)



They've not been seen together in a news story since the waning years of the Clinton administration.
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Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life...

Offline Wretched Excess

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #21 on: February 09, 2009, 08:23:56 PM »
Quote from: asdf2231 on February 09, 2009, 06:49:27 PM
They've not been seen together in a news story since the waning years of the Clinton administration.

ah, but those weren't "mystery" dildos, they were merely unclaimed.  but everyone knew that they were bill's   :bolt:


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Offline Chris

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #22 on: February 09, 2009, 08:43:21 PM »
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Australians have renamed a street "Dildo Boulevard" after 30 sex toys were found lying in front of a house on Friday morning.

Obviously a Tupperware party gone wrong.
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Offline Airwolf

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #23 on: February 09, 2009, 09:13:44 PM »
Quote from: thundley4 on February 09, 2009, 12:40:41 PM
Since this was was Australia, would this be considered a sex toy?




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Offline Miss Mia

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Re: Plague of mystery dildos found outside home
« Reply #24 on: February 09, 2009, 09:36:25 PM »
Quote from: Wretched Excess on February 09, 2009, 08:23:56 PM
ah, but those weren't "mystery" dildos, they were merely unclaimed.  but everyone knew that they were bill's   :bolt:





LOL!
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