Author Topic: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling  (Read 5358 times)

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Offline Wretched Excess

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Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« on: January 22, 2009, 05:33:39 AM »

The rest of the headline reads:

by his clinically depressed poodle

Former French president Jacques Chirac was rushed to hospital after being mauled by his own 'clinically depressed' pet dog.

The 76-year-old statesman was savaged by his white Maltese dog - which suffers from frenzied fits and is being treated with anti-depressants.

The animal, named Sumo, had become increasingly violent over the past years and was prone to making 'vicious, unprovoked attacks', Chirac's wife Bernadette said.

The former president, who ruled France for 12 years until 2007, was taken to hospital in Paris where he was treated as an outpatient and sent home, VSD magazine reported.


'Course, with a name like "Sumo," one would expect some sort of physicality . . . But this stuff just writes itself.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1126136/Former-French-President-Chirac-hospitalised-mauling-clinically-depressed-poodle.html

Sounds like the dog is looking for a "traumatic lead injection."  (Something the .30-30 could handle, right, Tantal?  :tongue: )

Oh--I got this courtesy of the Barking Moonbat Early Warning System.


**edited by WE for art**
« Last Edit: January 22, 2009, 08:08:54 AM by Wretched Excess »

Offline Sam Adams

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #1 on: January 22, 2009, 05:40:13 AM »
Yes, but it was a BIG poodle.

Offline formerlurker

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #2 on: January 22, 2009, 05:54:08 AM »
Not a fan of Chirac, but when I read the thread title I was concerned for him. 

Now after reading the article --  :whatever:, how in the hell does a dog become "clinically depressed?"


Offline formerlurker

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #3 on: January 22, 2009, 05:56:55 AM »


"Maul" from this thing?   

Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #4 on: January 22, 2009, 06:17:40 AM »
how in the hell does a dog become "clinically depressed?"

French socialism will do that to you.
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Offline mamacags

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #5 on: January 22, 2009, 07:25:04 AM »
More violent over the years!?!?!  What kind of idiot keeps a violent dog in their house?  Unless it is a trained attack dog, when they are violent you put them down.  DUH!!!!!!! :thatsright: :thatsright: :thatsright: :thatsright: :thatsright:
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Offline Eupher

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #6 on: January 22, 2009, 07:58:47 AM »
 :rotf: :lmao:

Damn, I always knew the French were pussies an' all, but to be hospitalized because of being attacked by a freakin' lap dog?

 :rotf:  :lmao:

Apparently, Chirac wasn't done surrendering!!!!!



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Offline jtyangel

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #7 on: January 22, 2009, 07:59:53 AM »
:rotf: :lmao:

Damn, I always knew the French were pussies an' all, but to be hospitalized because of being attacked by a freakin' lap dog?

 :rotf:  :lmao:

Apparently, Chirac wasn't done surrendering!!!!!





That was my reaction as well... :rotf:

and then I agree with mama, who would keep a damn dog with problems like this to begin with. Dumbasses

Offline jinxmchue

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #8 on: January 22, 2009, 09:29:17 AM »
That poor dog!  Imagine what biting an unwashed Frenchman would do to it!

Offline Toastedturningtidelegs

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #9 on: January 22, 2009, 09:35:14 AM »

The rest of the headline reads:

by his clinically depressed poodle

Former French president Jacques Chirac was rushed to hospital after being mauled by his own 'clinically depressed' pet dog.

The 76-year-old statesman was savaged by his white Maltese dog - which suffers from frenzied fits and is being treated with anti-depressants.

The animal, named Sumo, had become increasingly violent over the past years and was prone to making 'vicious, unprovoked attacks', Chirac's wife Bernadette said.

The former president, who ruled France for 12 years until 2007, was taken to hospital in Paris where he was treated as an outpatient and sent home, VSD magazine reported.


'Course, with a name like "Sumo," one would expect some sort of physicality . . . But this stuff just writes itself.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1126136/Former-French-President-Chirac-hospitalised-mauling-clinically-depressed-poodle.html

Sounds like the dog is looking for a "traumatic lead injection."  (Something the .30-30 could handle, right, Tantal?  :tongue: )
Oh--I got this courtesy of the Barking Moonbat Early Warning System.


**edited by WE for art**
Looking at that dog it looks like a BB gun could do the job! :-)
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Offline Wretched Excess

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #10 on: January 22, 2009, 10:45:14 AM »
Looking at that dog it looks like a BB gun could do the job! :-)

that isn't the actual dog, but it's the same breed.  reminds me of the killer bunny in monty pyton's in search of the holy grail;  "you could get a nasty infection".


Offline Toastedturningtidelegs

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #11 on: January 22, 2009, 10:52:59 AM »
that isn't the actual dog, but it's the same breed.  reminds me of the killer bunny in monty pyton's in search of the holy grail;  "you could get a nasty infection".


Quote
That rabbits DYNAMITE!
:rotf:
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Offline BlueStateSaint

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #12 on: January 22, 2009, 11:15:32 AM »
:rotf: :lmao:

Damn, I always knew the French were pussies an' all, but to be hospitalized because of being attacked by a freakin' lap dog?

 :rotf:  :lmao:

Apparently, Chirac wasn't done surrendering!!!!!





H5!

Thank you, WE, for the assist on the pic.  If it was a full-sized, standard Poodle, I could see that, as those dogs can be big.
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Offline MarshallLaw

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #13 on: January 22, 2009, 03:03:43 PM »
You know, if it had been a German Shepard, maybe it would have been a little more understandable.


If not inevitable.





Either way, it's still funny.

Offline formerlurker

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #14 on: January 22, 2009, 03:31:23 PM »



I may have to make this dog my avatar. 

Offline Chris_

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #15 on: January 22, 2009, 03:41:06 PM »
Are you sure you can handle an avatar that vicious?   :rotf:
If you want to worship an orange pile of garbage with a reckless disregard for everything, get on down to Arbys & try our loaded curly fries.

Offline Bluesuiter-Retired

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #16 on: January 23, 2009, 11:56:06 AM »
Call me sick, but maybe the dog wasn't in to doing it "doggie style" with chirac.

You do know why clinton's dog buddy got run over.  He was running away from bill after he saw him approaching with his trousers draped around his ankles and decided,  NO WAY PAL.
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Offline Bluesuiter-Retired

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #17 on: January 23, 2009, 11:57:21 AM »
Remember Jimmy "the peanut farmer" Karter and the attack rabbit.  There must be something about liberals which bring out the "ANIMAL" in others.
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Offline dilloduck

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #18 on: January 23, 2009, 07:17:35 PM »
To be fair I think it was a nutria that jumped in his boat   :-)

Offline Wretched Excess

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #19 on: January 23, 2009, 07:31:58 PM »
Remember Jimmy "the peanut farmer" Karter and the attack rabbit.  There must be something about liberals which bring out the "ANIMAL" in others.
 :lmao:

they banned you at milnet again, didn't they? :whatever: :-)

Offline Bluesuiter-Retired

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #20 on: January 23, 2009, 09:48:35 PM »
they banned you at milnet again, didn't they? :whatever: :-)

You could say that, however, I prefer that I purposely committed suicide by moderator [omaha-ha-ha-ha] who kept reading something into a post about obama which was not there.

If omaha-ha-ha-ha is that narrow-minded and read something into a threat which wasn't there, that is his problem and he had the power. 

Its like the bull$hit the dims/libs spew about -- if you don't support obama you are a racist. 

Currently watching the History Channel show about Tom Cruise's new movie about the attempt to assassinate Hitler.  Those who supported Hitler viewed those as not supporting hitler were traitors.

What is really scary about the History Channel program, is there are A LOT of similarities between Germany under the Nazi and the U.S. under obama.
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Offline Wretched Excess

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #21 on: January 23, 2009, 10:16:05 PM »
You could say that, however, I prefer that I purposely committed suicide by moderator [omaha-ha-ha-ha] who kept reading something into a post about obama which was not there.

If omaha-ha-ha-ha is that narrow-minded and read something into a threat which wasn't there, that is his problem and he had the power. 

Its like the bull$hit the dims/libs spew about -- if you don't support obama you are a racist. 

Currently watching the History Channel show about Tom Cruise's new movie about the attempt to assassinate Hitler.  Those who supported Hitler viewed those as not supporting hitler were traitors.

What is really scary about the History Channel program, is there are A LOT of similarities between Germany under the Nazi and the U.S. under obama.


no, what is really scary is that you come over here after they ban you.

you will gain nothing by coming here.


Offline Wretched Excess

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #22 on: January 23, 2009, 10:19:24 PM »
You could say that, however, I prefer that I purposely committed suicide by moderator [omaha-ha-ha-ha] who kept reading something into a post about obama which was not there.

If omaha-ha-ha-ha is that narrow-minded and read something into a threat which wasn't there, that is his problem and he had the power. 

Its like the bull$hit the dims/libs spew about -- if you don't support obama you are a racist. 

Currently watching the History Channel show about Tom Cruise's new movie about the attempt to assassinate Hitler.  Those who supported Hitler viewed those as not supporting hitler were traitors.

What is really scary about the History Channel program, is there are A LOT of similarities between Germany under the Nazi and the U.S. under obama.


generally speaking, if you are banned at our sister site, then you are banned here.


Offline LC EFA

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Re: Former French President Chirac hospitalised after mauling
« Reply #23 on: January 24, 2009, 12:11:29 AM »
You know, if it had been a German Shepard, maybe it would have been a little more understandable.


If not inevitable.





Either way, it's still funny.

Heh. That was good.