Please come live with me so I can get rid of my cheating wife

[Wretched Excess]

EPIC FAIL.

 

$325 EAST VILLAGE- Controlled and large 3 bed (East Village) (map)

-Wow…I can’t believe I am doing this..But I am looking for someone to rent my rent controlled apartment. The monthly rent is extremely cheap and would be a dream for many people in this city. It is in the east village close to A and 3rd. I caught my wife in bed with our neighbor who is almost 20 years younger than her. She is refusing to move out and still seeing him when I am at work, on my bed…I need someone to move in and help me get her out. Man or woman. My plan is to act like we are a couple until she can’t take it anymore. I have done everything possible to try and get her out..But she is a scumbag….So we need to create some type of plan that would get her out..i would charge you very cheap and all you would have to do is act like we are dating. We might have to kiss if front her and make fake sounds when we are in the bedroom. Please respond with a detailed description of your plan to get her out and a little about your self. You could live there after she is out and unless we fall in love we don’t have to do anything else.

Link

[DumbAss Tanker]

+5 for innovation.

-7 for plausibility.

-10 for probability of recruiting what he's looking for.

+8 chance of finding an even bigger scammer than himself, to his eventual regret.

[Miss Mia]

 

[Wretched Excess]

+5 for innovation.

-7 for plausibility.

-10 for probability of recruiting what he's looking for.

+8 chance of finding an even bigger scammer than himself, to his eventual regret.

I dunno.  it's so off the wall that it almost has to be true.  besides, it is perfectly consistent in one major way;  only a loser this huge could have an idea this incredibly stupid.

[Zeus]

I dunno.  it's so off the wall that it almost has to be true.  besides, it is perfectly consistent in one major way;  only a loser this huge could have an idea this incredibly stupid.

I think it all stems from neither party wants to part with a $325/month rent controlled apt. Said Apt outside of rent control probably runs about $1500 - $2000/mo.

[Red October]

Sounds like the plot-line to some romantic comedy 

[Wretched Excess]

I think it all stems from neither party wants to part with a $325/month rent controlled apt. Said Apt outside of rent control probably runs about $1500 - $2000/mo.

if he had any marbles at all, he would have run an ad for a hit man.

[JohnnyReb]

if he had any marbles at all, he would have run an ad for a hit man.

If he lived in Texas, he could have done it hinself when he caught them in bed. The only drawback is you have to kill them both.....costs twice as much for the  rounds......but in the end, it's worth it.

[Wretched Excess]

If he lived in Texas, he could have done it hinself when he caught them in bed. The only drawback is you have to kill them both.....costs twice as much for the  rounds......but in the end, it's worth it.

if you use a large enough caliber, it's possible to get them both with the same shot.  it would be a damn good shot, but it's possible.

[debk]

If he lived in Texas, he could have done it hinself when he caught them in bed. The only drawback is you have to kill them both.....costs twice as much for the  rounds......but in the end, it's worth it.

Apparently you can do it here in TN too.

Guy only had to serve 90 days for killing his wife's 18yo high school senior lover. The kid was not even in the house when he was killed.

The wife however was just sentenced to 95 days in jail for not allowing the husband to have his visitation with his kids. (they are divorced) The family court judge sentenced her. He's a d**khead. He was the judge for my divorce trial too.

[Wretched Excess]

Apparently you can do it here in TN too.

Guy only had to serve 90 days for killing his wife's 18yo high school senior lover. The kid was not even in the house when he was killed.

The wife however was just sentenced to 95 days in jail for not allowing the husband to have his visitation with his kids. (they are divorced) The family court judge sentenced her. He's a d**khead. He was the judge for my divorce trial too.

you could have left this part out, I think.

[debk]

you could have left this part out, I think.

kinda obvious, huh? 

[Wretched Excess]

kinda obvious, huh? 

I'm thinking so.   if the cheating didn't do the trick, the murder almost certainly would have.

[debk]

I'm thinking so.   if the cheating didn't do the trick, the murder almost certainly would have.

My other half wondered why he didn't just shoot the wife....have to admit I wondered the same thing. She was his teacher.

[Chris_]

Sounds like the plot-line to some romantic comedy  :mental:

At least it would be more original than making a movie from another 60s or 70s TV show or a remake of classic Sci Fi movie.

[Wretched Excess]

My other half wondered why he didn't just shoot the wife....have to admit I wondered the same thing. She was his teacher.

because shooting chicks is rude.

oh.  hey, I think I remember this story now.  didn't it make national news?

[debk]

because shooting chicks is rude.

oh.  hey, I think I remember this story now.  didn't it make national news?

yep.

another one of the teacher/student affairs.....

I do feel very sorry for the kid's family.....he was just a typical high school guy...thinking with his hormones instead of his brain.

The fact that the husband only got 90 days in jail, is just wrong.

[Wretched Excess]

yep.

another one of the teacher/student affairs.....

I do feel very sorry for the kid's family.....he was just a typical high school guy...thinking with his hormones instead of his brain.

The fact that the husband only got 90 days in jail, is just wrong.

right?

[debk]

right?

yes.

[BlueStateSaint]

I dunno.  it's so off the wall that it almost has to be true.  besides, it is perfectly consistent in one major way;  only a loser this huge could have an idea this incredibly stupid.

 

I'm shocked that no one has asked this question--what's this loser's DU name?