Author Topic: Drunken Santas Storm Midtown (Read 5677 times)

USA4ME · « **on:** December 16, 2008, 02:13:58 PM »

Quote from:

NEW YORK -- Nearly 1,000 Santa impersonators descended on Midtown Saturday, causing holiday chaos. For several years now, in cities across the country, dozens of booze-hungry folks have donned their Santa gear and embarked on the epic bar crawl known as Santacon. On Saturday at 10:00 a.m., Santas assembled in New York City â€“ the location is kept secret until 12 hours beforehand -- for "a frantic 15 to 48 hour life cycle, gorging on booze, fornicating, and spreading an overwhelming stench of cheer." All are welcome and the rules are simple. Proper apparel is mandatory, and you must maintain an appropriately Santa-like jollity and eschew press coverage. Perhaps the most important rule is Santa doesn't get arrested. To that end, participants are told to not mess with kids, cops, security or Santa. This year, it only took an hour for police to show up. Cops were called at about 11 a.m. when the drunk and unruly Kris -- and Kristine â€“ Kringles started to tie up traffic. The gathering was part of a nationwide call to dress up like Santa -- and just have a good time. Be careful out there.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28211859

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Wretched Excess · « **Reply #1 on:** December 16, 2008, 03:07:16 PM »

drunk santas at christmas? what could go wrong?

Miss Mia · « **Reply #2 on:** December 16, 2008, 03:08:30 PM »

Quote from: Wretched Excess on December 16, 2008, 03:07:16 PM

drunk santas at christmas? what could go wrong?

Wretched Excess · « **Reply #3 on:** December 16, 2008, 03:13:19 PM »

this santacon thing is actually a pretty big event, from the sound of it . . .

Sweet Dee · « **Reply #4 on:** December 16, 2008, 03:15:07 PM »

Quote from: Wretched Excess on December 16, 2008, 03:13:19 PM

this santacon thing is actually a pretty big event, from the sound of it . . .

I kinda want to get in on that action myself! hehe

Wretched Excess · « **Reply #5 on:** December 16, 2008, 03:17:14 PM »

they have rules. figures.

Quote

Santa's Rules:

* Santa looks like Santa. HOLIDAY APPAREL IS MANDATORY. A Santa hat is not enough. Get a Santa suit. Buy a Santa suit. Make a Santa suit. Steal a Santa suit. Get creative: be a Secret Santa, a Santasaurus, Candy-cane, a Reindeer, a Chanukah Chicken, a ******* latke, Stewardess Santa, Knight Rider Santa, Crusty Peace Punk Santa, the occasional Legless Reindeer, Chanukah Squirrel, Emo-Elf, or the Santichrist.
Just don't wear your ****ing jeans.
* Santa acts like Santa. Be jolly. Belly-laugh. Let people sit on your lap. Give out gifts.
* Santa doesn't seek media attention. "Ho-ho-ho" is good. "Publicity ho" is lame.
* Santa doesn't get arrested. Please remember the FOUR ****S:
1. Don't **** with kids.
2. Don't **** with cops.
3. Don't **** with security.
4. Don't **** with Santa. (it's okay to **** a Santa)

Santa's Guidelines:

* IT'S A LONG DAY, SO BE PREPARED. Here's some tips to keep your sleigh running. Eat something.
Santa is responsible for his own feeding! This is New York City -- if reindeer can figure it out, so can you.
* Stay hydrated & pace yourself.
Try some water in between your milk and cookies.
* Bring a MetroCard.
Santa doesn't like waiting while hundreds of drunks attempt to use the machines.
* Santa is responsible for his own inebriation.
SantaCon is not a bar crawl, it's a convention. There will be bar stops, but they will be crowded. Santa does not advocate breaking open container laws! Santa's just sayin'...
* Pay your own damn bar tab and tip bartenders well for putting up with Santa.
* Dress warm.
Wear layers so you'll be comfortable anywhere from the North Pole to the strippers' pole.
* Stay with the group.
Santa is not texting. Santa is not updating his location. If a Santa drunkenly wanders off or misses the 10am start, he will have to know a friendly Santa to call and help them.
* Don't be "that" Santa.
Your friends want to have fun, not scrape the puke outta your beard or prevent your wasted ass from wandering into traffic.
* Santa does not make children cry (unless they whine, snivel, or otherwise deserve it).
Really - If you see kids, give them nice toys, candy, or something pleasant. Feel free to urinate on the parents. Tourists fall somewhere in between the two -- adjust depending on their attitude.

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