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Author Topic: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!  (Read 3402 times)

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Offline Lord Undies

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Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« on: August 25, 2008, 06:35:14 PM »
So dinnertime's here.  How I love to cook dinner!  Tonight I am making fajitas!  Ole'!

So, I almost always use a poblano pepper in my fajitas.  They are not too hot, most of the time, and they do add some spice. 

So, I was in the kitchen de-ribbing and seeding a poblano pepper when I got an urgent call from nature.  Yes, I had to tinkle-dink BAD.

So, I finish my pepper preparation and hit a fast stride (for me, anyway) to the hallway powder bath.  On the way, I rub my itchy right eye.

So, after exiting the hallway powder bath and making my way back to the kitchen....boom!  My right eye is on fire!  Great Caesar's Ghost it burned.  I bent over the sink and started washing my eye with soap....that's how bad it burned.  Soap felt better.

So, while I was bent over the sink...TINGLE!  My my tinky-dinker started feeling odd down there in my shorts....and then BOOM!


So, the moral to this story is:  Always wash your hands after handling peppers, especially if you have itchy eyes and a urgent need to go tinkle-dink.

THE END.

(We coulda had hot dogs)
« Last Edit: August 25, 2008, 06:44:45 PM by Lord Undies »
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Offline Chris_

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #1 on: August 25, 2008, 06:39:35 PM »
At your age you didn't know the result of capsaicin  + privates?

Color me surprised (really!)

Ladies, I suspect it such an interaction would be worse.
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Offline Lord Undies

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #2 on: August 25, 2008, 06:43:16 PM »
Quote from: freedumb2003 on August 25, 2008, 06:39:35 PM
At your age you didn't know the result of capsaicin  + privates?

Color me surprised (really!)

Ladies, I suspect it such an interaction would be worse.


Let's call it a momentary lapse of judgement. 
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Offline BEG

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #3 on: August 25, 2008, 06:43:49 PM »
Sounds like something I would do....that is if I had a penis.
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Offline DixieBelle

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #4 on: August 25, 2008, 06:45:53 PM »
Thank goodness you weren't using habaneros. I'm still not over that little episode.
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No, my friends, there’s only one really progressive idea. And that is the idea of legally limiting the power of the government. That one genuinely liberal, genuinely progressive idea — the Why in 1776, the How in 1787 — is what needs to be conserved. We need to conserve that fundamentally liberal idea. That is why we are conservatives. --Bill Whittle

Offline Schadenfreude

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #5 on: August 25, 2008, 06:45:58 PM »
Quote from: BEG on August 25, 2008, 06:43:49 PM
Sounds like something I would do....that is if I had a penis.

no comment!  :uhsure:
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Offline dutch508

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #6 on: August 25, 2008, 06:47:03 PM »
Quote from: BEG on August 25, 2008, 06:43:49 PM
Sounds like something I would do....that is if I had a penis.

You can borrow mine. I'm not using it right at the moment.

 :naughty:
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Offline Lord Undies

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #7 on: August 25, 2008, 06:48:30 PM »
Quote from: DixieBelle on August 25, 2008, 06:45:53 PM
Thank goodness you weren't using habaneros. I'm still not over that little episode.

I would have been wearing gloves and that would have reminded me of the pending wiener roast.
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Offline Lord Undies

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #8 on: August 25, 2008, 06:49:42 PM »
Quote from: dutch508 on August 25, 2008, 06:47:03 PM
Quote from: BEG on August 25, 2008, 06:43:49 PM
Sounds like something I would do....that is if I had a penis.

You can borrow mine. I'm not using it right at the moment.

 :naughty:

"Do you ever use it right?"   :rimshot:
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Offline Schadenfreude

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #9 on: August 25, 2008, 06:50:16 PM »
Oh Undies, I am laughing through tears.  :lmao:
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Offline DixieBelle

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #10 on: August 25, 2008, 06:50:41 PM »
Quote from: Lord Undies on August 25, 2008, 06:48:30 PM
Quote from: DixieBelle on August 25, 2008, 06:45:53 PM
Thank goodness you weren't using habaneros. I'm still not over that little episode.

I would have been wearing gloves and that would have reminded me of the pending wiener roast.
well, live and learn. :-) Did you know that stuff has hang time? I made the mistake of touching the chair I was sitting in and it stayed in the fabric. I touched it again days later and rubbed my eye and nearly died all over again. Them's the debil peppers.
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I can see November 2 from my house!!!

Spread my work ethic, not my wealth.

Forget change, bring back common sense.
-------------------------------------------------

No, my friends, there’s only one really progressive idea. And that is the idea of legally limiting the power of the government. That one genuinely liberal, genuinely progressive idea — the Why in 1776, the How in 1787 — is what needs to be conserved. We need to conserve that fundamentally liberal idea. That is why we are conservatives. --Bill Whittle

Offline bijou

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #11 on: August 25, 2008, 07:16:29 PM »
Haha.  Sorry to hear about that Undies.   But good to know that CCers can make our own weird news, when are you moving to Florida?  :rotf:
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Offline Lord Undies

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #12 on: August 25, 2008, 09:06:59 PM »
OK.  It finally quit burning.   :beer:
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Offline jinxmchue

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #13 on: August 25, 2008, 10:58:37 PM »
Oh, man.  And I thought getting soap up yer Urethra Franklin was bad.
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Offline Tantal

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #14 on: August 25, 2008, 11:03:38 PM »
I had the same thing happen when I was a rookie. Drunken bar fight....everybody hosed down with OC (oleoresin capsicum) gas. Fight continues, and my hands are covered in it. Get suspects to jail for booking. Once the adrenaline wore off, my back teeth were floatin'. So, I'm about halfway through an Austin Powers whizz when it suddenly feels like someone's holding a butane torch under the twig n' berries. For the record, OC gas lasts for about an hour......then fires up again when you take a shower.
« Last Edit: August 26, 2008, 08:37:00 AM by Tantal »
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Offline Lord Undies

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #15 on: August 25, 2008, 11:10:53 PM »
Quote from: Tantal on August 25, 2008, 11:03:38 PM
I had the same thing happen when I was a rookie. Drunken bar fight....everybody hosed down with OC (oleoresin capsicum) gas. Fight continues, and my hands are covered in it. Get suspects to jail for booking. Once the adrenaline wore off, my back teeth were floatin'. So, I'm about halfway through and Austin Powers whizz when it suddenly feels like someone's holding a butane torch under the twig n' berries. For the record, OC gas lasts for about an hour......then fires up again when you take a shower.

You're lucky you have just twigs and berries.  It was REALLY painful for a guy like me.   :-)
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Offline RobJohnson

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Re: Calling Bijou! Today's Penis Story!
« Reply #16 on: August 26, 2008, 12:28:31 AM »
A few years ago I did not realize that I had an exposure to posion oak, until after I had urinated. I woke up the next morning in alot of pain.

I blew a whole week of vacation time healing...had it all over my arms, legs, face and groin.

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