I just got back from the big big city, and the face, neck, and shoulders look as if I've crawled through a barbed wire fence, but God is good, and such heals quickly.
I was getting ready to head out this morning, when the neighbor dropped by, and insisted we go in his pick-up truck, as he wanted to buy some fencing in the big big city. I reminded him the big city has fencing too, and there was no reason to go all this distance; he said fencing was cheaper in the big big city.
"But you have to figure in time and expense," I reminded him; "diesel at $4.15 a gallon, a pick-up truck with not the best mileage, and an hour-and-a-half going to, and and another hour-and-a-half getting back--that fencing would have to be half the cost in the big big city, that it is in the big city, to make up for it."
The neighbor's forte is mathematics, not economics, and so off we went.
Most of the trip involved talking about women; what makes them tick, what makes them not tick.
We got to the office of the dermatologist--usually I see him in the big city, but this was compelling enough that I made an appointment with the main office--and learned everything had been delayed by an hour. I decided it would be a good idea if the neighbor just went off and bought his goods, and came back to pick me up.
The neighbor asked the receptionist an approximate time I would be done; she couldn't tell him.
Then I suggested he could call while out-and-about; he has a cellular telephone.
The receptionist said I would have to sign a "release" then, for protection and confidentiality purposes.
Then I asked, "Well, what if you were to call him, when I'm done?"
The receptionist said that wouldn't be a problem, and no need for a "release."
So the neighbor left, and I made myself at home in the waiting room. Most people resent having to sit and twiddle their thumbs for long times, but it's something I'm used to. Efficiency experts long ago determined that when deaf people work, they work only 40% of the time, the other 60% of the time just waiting..... (But since their "output" matches that of hearing people, that means we do more work in three and a half hours, than hearing people do in eight hours.)
I've always been used to waiting, all my life, a talent that helped me get through the socialist paradises of the workers and peasants with free medical care for all, such as standing outside of a store (no place to sit down; one had to stand) in -20 F temperatures, for four or five hours, for the opportunity to buy a couple of liters of milk. I'm a professional at waiting; I can wait with aplomb and grace and nonchalance.
I engaged in a conversation with an elderly lady sitting next to me. I of course could not hear her, and alas she was responsive but unexpressive, so I have no idea what we were talking about. It's one of those cases where one person is talking about painting submarines while the other person is talking about the cultivation of tulips.
After a while, I noticed there was some guy, about my own age, maybe a little younger, eyeglassesed and bearded, watching with avid interest. He was watching me, not the old lady, and I got nervous about it.
When the old lady was summoned and left, the guy came over and introduced himself; some sort of professor of audiology at the University of Iowa (his wife was being treated). Then before I could get a word in, he commented, "You're deaf, I'm taking it--but you're speaking the most precise and correct English even a hearing person can speak. How did you learn how to do that?"
Whoa.
In truth, the voice is much like the Platte River, along where I spent my childhood--broad and flat and slow. The voice doesn't bother decent and civilized people, such as "fundies" or little old ladies or rednecks or military people or farmers or ranchers or blue-collars or physicians or dentists or felons or those for whom English is a second language (or no language at all) or conservatives or Republicans (of any ideological stripe), but ever since I acquired it, I've noticed it always has a jarring, disturbing effect on Democrats, liberals, and primitives.
It really bothers Democrats, liberals, and primitives. Some, it even drives nuts.
I have no idea why this is, but there you have it.
Anyway, so we chitchatted about that for a while; I didn't speak intelligible English until I took speech therapy when in college, and was 21 years old; the "voice" is the result of successful attempts to eliminate stammering and stuttering. As I haven't stammered or stuttered since I was 22 years old, whatever is negative about the "voice" is a small price to have paid. I'd rather have the "voice" than stammer and stutter.
When I was summoned, he gave me his card. If the card is accurate, he was what he said he was.
I endured all the stuff involved with significant skin removal, and then the receptionist telephoned my neighbor, saying I was ready to go, and he arrived there ten minutes later.
On our way back here, we talked about women; possible reasons women are the way they are.