The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 09:21:54 AM

Title: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 09:21:54 AM
Should the primitives discuss sex--their observations of, and experiences with, hopping around in the sack--on Skins's island?

Apparently such discussions are verboten on Skins's island, but one's really surprised no primitive's ever seemed to object to banning one of their ostensibly--please notice the all-important word here, "ostensibly"--favorite recreational activities.

Now, usually decent and civilized people are rather reticent about sex--after all, some inhibitions are good--and so one doesn't expect to see such things on message boards dominated by decent and civilized people.

But these are primitives here.

The primitives go into great detail describing their lives, their habits, their conduct, their mental health, their prescriptions, their relatives, their jobs if they have one, their encounters with other people, and even their daily diets.

One gets a well-rounded view of the primitives, excepting the ball's got a big dent in it.

Sex is a pretty major activity, but the primitives never talk about that.

The "sexual revolution" was invented and fostered by the primitives; one supposes they're really proud of it.....and so reasonably expects they'd brag about it.

But the primitives don't; they remain mum.

<<<detects hypocrisy in the primitives' silence.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: JohnnyReb on May 23, 2014, 09:26:01 AM
Because they would discuss what color goat or dog they were going.......and that would be racist.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 09:27:47 AM
Because they would discuss what color goat or dog they were going.......and that would be racist.

Well, I'm getting the impression that, by the silence of the primitives, it all didn't turn out as great as they thought it would.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on May 23, 2014, 09:28:44 AM
Everything they do is ****ing stupid.

This would just be more of the same.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: sharkhawk on May 23, 2014, 09:33:05 AM
Because they would discuss what color goat or dog they were going.......and that would be racist.


Absolutely not.     Cal Pig  might write another poem about it.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: JohnnyReb on May 23, 2014, 09:34:36 AM
Well, I'm getting the impression that, by the silence of the primitives, it all didn't turn out as great as they thought it would.
Yeah, all that free love when they were young has now left them all alone, depressed and bitter. That's why they hate conservatives that limited their sex partners and are now able to grow old with a loving companion.

Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: USA4ME on May 23, 2014, 09:39:33 AM
No way!!

If I wanna see pigs in a blanket, I'll go to IHOP.

.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: Gina on May 23, 2014, 09:39:43 AM
I'm up for any sexual convo, but their's.  :panic:
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 09:40:00 AM
Everything they do is ****ing stupid.

This would just be more of the same.

But it could be interesting, resolving certain curiosities.

Curiosities based upon natural human curiosity, not prurient impulses.

For example, when sucking face, how does one deal with a partner with a large protuberance on her chin?  It seems to me that would get in the way, and even with my vivid imagination, I can't think of how it'd be done.

Or when doing that other thing, how does one deal with oversized jugs that prop one up into a nearly-standing position?  I mean yeah, I can figure out ways of getting around that, but none of them are exactly comfortable.

Or at what angle does one approach a beach-ball with short legs?

I'm starting to think the primitives don't have as much sex as they'd like us to believe; for example, Atman has a television in his bedroom.  He's supposed to be pleasing his wife in the bedroom, not watching the boob-tube.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 09:42:38 AM
Yeah, all that free love when they were young has now left them all alone, depressed and bitter. That's why they hate conservatives that limited their sex partners and are now able to grow old with a loving companion.

Uh huh.

I give you the.....windy primitive, the primitive with creases under her buttocks.

All that romping around with everything and anything that moved, and look at her now.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 09:45:07 AM
Uh huh.

I give you the.....windy primitive, the primitive with creases under her buttocks.

All that romping around with everything and anything that moved, and look at her now.

"from beauty to beast"
http://conservativecave.com/index.php?topic=95551.0
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: Gina on May 23, 2014, 09:46:02 AM
But it could be interesting, resolving certain curiosities.



Or at what angle does one approach a beach-ball with short legs?



Frank, you don't have a mini crush on gNads do you?  :naughty:
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: landofconfusion80 on May 23, 2014, 09:48:20 AM
I'm up for any sexual convo, but their's.  :panic:

....ok, gonna have to sit down somewhere for a bit.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 09:49:09 AM
Frank, you don't have a mini crush on gNads do you?  :naughty:

No, not at all.

It's just that the "mechanics" of things, any things, interest me.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: Carl on May 23, 2014, 10:04:24 AM
I suspect if many of them discussed their sexual activities it would result in arrests and prosecutions.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 10:07:28 AM
I suspect if many of them discussed their sexual activities it would result in arrests and prosecutions.

Well, for the once-hippies-now-primitives, sex was the greatest thing since the invention of sliced bread.

So why not tell us about it?

I suspect the primitives, by their silence on the matter, are depriving the world of substantial anthropological insight.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: BlueStateSaint on May 23, 2014, 10:18:37 AM

Absolutely not.     Cal Pig  might write another poem about it.

:runaway: :runaway: :runaway:
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: Chris_ on May 23, 2014, 10:22:19 AM
No, not at all.

It's just that the "mechanics" of things, any things, interest me.
Are you aware of the phrase "too fat to ****"?

I voted 'Yes', because I enjoy a good trainwreck as much as anybody.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: DumbAss Tanker on May 23, 2014, 10:35:18 AM
I had to go with 'Not sure.' 

On the one hand, there would be tremendous fights between the 'Rape culture' harridans and the heterosexuals, probably leading to massive bannage and any sexual posts being de facto limited to the muff diverettes debating shaved vs. natural as the feminazis relentlessly slap their 'Victim' card on the table, so there would be a lot of entertainment potential. 

But, on the other hand, we'd have to read a lot of disgusting things gay dudes do to each other while looking for mockery-worthy DU posts, as if they weren't oversharing 'way too much already.

I do have to say that I have always found it anomalous that a site which is supposedly for the edgiest members of the most-libertine political party has such prudish rules on this topic.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 10:44:46 AM
.....I have always found it anomalous that a site which is supposedly for the edgiest members of the most-libertine political party has such prudish rules on this topic.

That's it, that was my purpose in posting on this rather, uh, delicate subject.

These are the people who said "let it all hang out," "if it feels good, do it," "anything goes," "it's just a clump of cells easily removed," &c., &c., &c.

The primitives, in their younger days as hippies, invented "free love".

So how come they don't talk about it?

Maybe it didn't work out like they thought it would?  Maybe?
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: landofconfusion80 on May 23, 2014, 10:53:11 AM
That's it, that was my purpose in posting on this rather, uh, delicate subject.

These are the people who said "let it all hang out," "if it feels good, do it," "anything goes," "it's just a clump of cells easily removed," &c., &c., &c.

The primitives, in their younger days as hippies, invented "free love".

So how come they don't talk about it?

Maybe it didn't work out like they thought it would?  Maybe?

Too many experiences with being the ugliest/ shortest person at the orgy probably has a lasting effect.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: DumbAss Tanker on May 23, 2014, 10:55:07 AM
Maybe it didn't work out like they thought it would?  Maybe?

What, just because they all ended up miserable, ill-used, broke, and alone?  Surely not!

Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: Chris_ on May 23, 2014, 10:59:53 AM
What, just because they all ended up miserable, ill-used, broke, and alone?  Surely not!
But they were, like, totally destroying the patriarchal power structure by doing so, man.   :whatever:
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: Bad Dog on May 23, 2014, 11:20:53 AM
Back in the "Nam" when mentioning things one would rather not contemplate, we would say "everyone knows there is sex amongst water buffalo but, no one gives a s**t".   I'm in favor of applying that principle to the subject at hand.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: dutch508 on May 23, 2014, 12:06:33 PM
**** no.

Calpeg sex thread. Need I say more?
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: njpines on May 23, 2014, 12:14:52 PM
**** no.

Calpeg sex thread. Need I say more?

NO!
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: GOBUCKS on May 23, 2014, 12:42:00 PM
Yes, absolutely they should.

It makes for some of their funniest threads.

The DUmp would be a much lesser place without the classic "Aching Seed", or Pam Dawson's anniversary morning-after report.

Just think of the threads grasswipe Judy could start. Or Sarah Imaboobi. Or Horse With No Brain and her slutty daughter.

Gold medal material.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: landofconfusion80 on May 23, 2014, 12:44:54 PM
If we really want the DOTY nominations to take off.... absolutely! 

"Dear DU.... It was a cold dreary night in the coffee shop.  His words kept saying "EWWWWWW, NO!!! GOD HELP ME! GET AWAY FROM ME!" but his body was saying something completely different..."
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 12:46:14 PM
If we really want the DOTY nominations to take off.... absolutely!

That's what I was thinking, as an unintended but delightful consequence.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: BlueStateSaint on May 23, 2014, 01:07:14 PM
Again, I post my advisory:

:runaway: :runaway: :runaway: :runaway: :runaway:
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: Karin on May 23, 2014, 01:53:14 PM
I said absolutely not, because there's not enough brain bleach supply.  Anyway, they're all so hideous, I doubt anybody's getting anything. 

Anyone remember the incident with Pam's anniversary report?  I remember it was highly uncomfortable and hilarious, but I can't remember the particulars. 
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 02:12:11 PM
I said absolutely not, because there's not enough brain bleach supply.  Anyway, they're all so hideous, I doubt anybody's getting anything.

Well, they probably really aren't, but as they invented this "sexual liberation," the primitives need to account for what consequently happened.  Did it turn out a good thing?  Did it turn out a bad thing, all this promiscuity?

The primitives are being less than honest if they're not willing to describe their intimate encounters.  After all, they were the ones who brought it out of the bedroom into the open.

I think the primitives secretly think it was a mistake, all this hopping around in the sack with anything that moved, but they're too proud to admit it.

It still freaks me that Atman would rather watch television than please his wife.

What kind of husband is that?
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: landofconfusion80 on May 23, 2014, 02:17:36 PM

What kind of husband is that?

Well, look what he's working with... can you really blame him?
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 02:20:06 PM
Again, I post my advisory:

:runaway: :runaway: :runaway: :runaway: :runaway:

Uh huh.

Try to imagine antics in the bedroom between these two:

(http://i1100.photobucket.com/albums/g419/Eferrari/memorialday/hips2_zps9156bc9d.jpg) (http://s1100.photobucket.com/user/Eferrari/media/memorialday/hips2_zps9156bc9d.jpg.html)

I can't, and I have a vivid imagination.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 02:23:32 PM
Well, look what he's working with... can you really blame him?

Well, I'm rather more of the opinion that she's got the harder job.

Remember my gallantry towards women; if they're on the non-lithe, non-svelte side, I tend to "subtract" a hundred pounds or so in the mind*, so they end up "looking" aesthetic.

*the cousin excepted.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: BlueStateSaint on May 23, 2014, 02:25:16 PM

:puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke:

It's really too bad I can't make those damned emoticons puke in sequence, rather than all at the same time.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: DumbAss Tanker on May 23, 2014, 10:16:46 PM
Well, I'm rather more of the opinion that she's got the harder job.

Remember my gallantry towards women; if they're on the non-lithe, non-svelte side, I tend to "subtract" a hundred pounds or so in the mind*, so they end up "looking" aesthetic.

*the cousin excepted.

Of course, knocking a hundred pounds off 'Nads would still leave her far into the red zone on the hogometer.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: jb2u11 on May 23, 2014, 10:29:49 PM
I admit it would be amusing to read.  But anything that gives them ideas about procreation should be banned.  Then again if one gets pregnant they would likely just abort it anyway.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: Dori on May 23, 2014, 10:41:28 PM
I said absolutely not, because there's not enough brain bleach supply. 

That's what I was thinking too.

PhDD did write about having sex once, I think it included a lot of margaritas.

Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 23, 2014, 10:44:09 PM
That's what I was thinking too.

PhDD did write about having sex once, I think it included a lot of margaritas.

I missed that, and for the sake of anthropological illumination, it'd be nice to know that when she was laying on her back, did the guy have to flop them up over her shoulders or off to the sides?

For anthropological insight, remember.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: BlondeMoment on May 23, 2014, 10:49:23 PM
:backs slowly out of thread:

lol Now look what you've done. Oh my. Oh DEAR!

oh crap
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: obumazombie on May 24, 2014, 12:29:16 AM
Well, I'm getting the impression that, by the silence of the primitives, it all didn't turn out as great as they thought it would.
Can they, in this instance be referred to as lambs ?
You are missing an option for an answer.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: vesta111 on May 24, 2014, 07:43:02 AM
:backs slowly out of thread:

lol Now look what you've done. Oh my. Oh DEAR!

oh crap

One thing not discussed in sex education class is how to have sex with a pregnant woman.  We still live in a world of prudes even in medical schools.

My thinking is the missionary position was encouraged by the  the sex workers so they got more business from their married customers.   

The Churches encouraged this practice as they had more guilty men trying to save their souls by giving more money in the collection plate.

Wives loved it as they had a few months each year of not having a sweaty, smelly husband all over them.

Discussions about sex are no different then talking about what other physical actions one is doing, eating, sleeping, constarpation, an ingrown toe nail.

 It is the Liberals that keep the keep the subject Taboo, so we will except gay life and not think too much about it.   :fuelfire:

Bring it on Libs, I learn more about life from them and it is not pretty.     
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: franksolich on May 24, 2014, 08:02:07 AM
Discussions about sex are no different then talking about what other physical actions one is doing.....

I wouldn't go that far, vesta dear; as originally mentioned, some inhibitions, some self-restraints, are good.

Quote
It is the liberals that keep the subject taboo.....

Which illustrates their hypocrisy, and the purpose of this inquiry.  They brought on this "sexual liberation" stuff, this "sexual revolution," bringing it out into the open from behind closed doors.....so why in this aftermath of unlimited promiscuity, aren't they talking about it?

I mean, come on, if it was so great, they should be boasting about their participation in it.

And it seems to me the Lounge on Skins's island is the perfect venue for such discussions and descriptions.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: Ptarmigan on May 24, 2014, 11:26:50 AM
If they do, I am going to need a lot of industrial strength mind bleach and they are expensive.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: JohnnyReb on May 24, 2014, 11:49:40 AM
One thing not discussed in sex education class is how to have sex with a pregnant woman.  We still live in a world of prudes even in medical schools.

My thinking is the missionary position was encouraged by the  the sex workers so they got more business from their married customers.   

The Churches encouraged this practice as they had more guilty men trying to save their souls by giving more money in the collection plate.

Wives loved it as they had a few months each year of not having a sweaty, smelly husband all over them.

Discussions about sex are no different then talking about what other physical actions one is doing, eating, sleeping, constarpation, an ingrown toe nail.

 It is the Liberals that keep the keep the subject Taboo, so we will except gay life and not think too much about it.   :fuelfire:

Bring it on Libs, I learn more about life from them and it is not pretty.   

I prefer tying her to the ceiling fan. Round and round she goes, where she stops nobody knows.  :-)

Now excuse me, I have to replace the ceiling in the bedroom.
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: Dori on May 24, 2014, 01:47:44 PM
One thing not discussed in sex education class is how to have sex with a pregnant woman.......

BAWHAHAHAHAH......... :lmao:

why do I feel like I get whip lash from reading Vesta's posts?




Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: BattleHymn on May 24, 2014, 01:58:32 PM
I voted yes. 

One of the pillars of primitivity is sticking things where they don't belong.  As uncomfortable as it may be to read, it deserves equal merit in study.   
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: I_B_Perky on May 24, 2014, 07:19:03 PM
Not only no but HELL NO!!!!! Who wants to read about two fat unwashed lizzies licking split? Or two queers packing fudge? Not me!!!!
Title: Re: poll: should the primitives discuss sex?
Post by: vesta111 on May 25, 2014, 07:08:40 AM
Not only no but HELL NO!!!!! Who wants to read about two fat unwashed lizzies licking split? Or two queers packing fudge? Not me!!!!

 :lol: :lol: :lol:    Just skip over those pages and go on to the next subject, Erotic Strangulation for example.

So many interesting life styles out there, I found this out as a kid reading the NGO mags. and looking for pictures of naked Africans.

Sex is interesting and can be very funny at times, what on Earth turns one person on and another off is a mystery to me.     

My biggest bitch about the subject is the authors that insist in destroying their storys with sex scenes so their work is unsutiable for youngsters to read. Jaws for instance, would be a classic  for the ages had the sex scene not been included.   

My kids loved to read adventure storys and I debated with myself about censoring that few pages,  what the heck I waited a few years and took them to the movie.