The 2013 Darwin Awards Are Out!
Posted on August 20, 2013 by Jim G.
The 2013 Darwins Are Out!!!!
Yes, it’s that magical time of year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us.
Here Is The Glorious Winner:
1. When his .38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
And Now, The Honorable Mentions:
2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef’s claim was approved. Saint's note: I can see that happening.
3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her. Completely understandable, seeing the snowstorms we got lately.
This one is the best! 4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn’t discovered for 3 days.
The Daily Sheeple linked to a blog called My Underwood Typewriter for this one. (Vesta, no stories a bout typewriters, please!)
The other six are here: http://jdgroover.wordpress.com/2013/08/20/the-2013-darwin-awards-are-out/
Sometimes, all you can do is this: :thatsright: :mental:
Sorry about this but this brings to mind the story about how the typewriter was invented.
Check your keyboard, just like a typewriter, but who had designed the darn thing ?
Why a Q next to a W and the M next to the N ? Seems the original layout was much different and changed for a reason. I have searched high and low for a picture of the original lay out and why it was changed.
As for the story about the bus passengers spending 3 days in a mental hospital, I thought this was all too funny until I began to wonder if this happened to me, it would be months before I got home.
Blue State Saint brought this on himself by asking you not to.
The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef’s claim was approved.
I love the Darwin Awards.
I thought one had to be deceased to win a Darwin?
I was so pissed when the Mythbusters proved you couldn't fly a Camaro into a mountainside with JATO rockets. Made me suspect all the Darwins.
I thought one had to be deceased to win a Darwin?
Yeah, the sole criterion is to do something so incredibly stupid as to remove oneself from the gene pool. This can be achieved by death, or by removing the capacity to procreate.
I don't know if any Darwin Award winner won the thing after having had children, though. :confused:
Not that it matters -- there is no shortage of stupid people on the planet.
Sorry about this but this brings to mind the story about how the typewriter was invented.
Check your keyboard, just like a typewriter, but who had designed the darn thing ?
Why a Q next to a W and the M next to the N ? Seems the original layout was much different and changed for a reason. I have searched high and low for a picture of the original lay out and why it was changed.
As for the story about the bus passengers spending 3 days in a mental hospital, I thought this was all too funny until I began to wonder if this happened to me, it would be months before I got home.
(http://s1.thejournal.ie/media/2013/10/head-desk-bartlett.gif)
I wish to congratulate Vesta on making this thread win the Darwin Award.
She's dead, Jim.
It seems like story #4 (the bus driver with mental patients) gets around every year. I KNOW this is not the first time I've heard this...The ones that suffocated in the bus on the GW bridge because Christie personally stepped in front of traffic and jammed it into gridlock ?
I was so pissed when the Mythbusters proved you couldn't fly a Camaro into a mountainside with JATO rockets. Made me suspect all the Darwins.
She's dead, Jim.
No!The dead pool might hold the key.
Please tell me no!
She's dead, Jim.