The Conservative Cave
The Bar => The Lounge => Topic started by: The Hollywood NeoCon on March 14, 2011, 10:57:09 AM
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Like, this is the GR8TST thing that has EVR happened to moi!!!!!!
Lisa has given me permission to leave her and the kids in order to devote the rest of my life to becoming Jason Statham's total gay boitoi!!!!
Okay, enough nonsense...
Just finished watching all three Transporter movies (having never seen any of them before), and I gotta say it, Statham is the shit, and the candy-assed Bostonian sissy (aka Matt Damon) who weakly portrayed Bourne needs to take a big, honking whiff.
I can't believe he wasn't even ****ing considered to be Bond, but in all honesty, I certainly understand why Craig got the nod, given the uber-violence Statham happily dishes out, and the fact that Ian Fleming was a well-known poof.
Just have to say it, kids: If I didn't love the va-jay-jay as much as I do, I could easily see myself spending the next 5 years rubbing this bad-assed mofo's feet in exchange for close-combat fighting lessons (or his agent and trainer's phone numbers).
Say what you will, a conservative acknowledges excellence...only the libtard rewards projection.
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Like, this is the GR8TST thing that has EVR happened to moi!!!!!!
Lisa has given me permission to leave her and the kids in order to devote the rest of my life to becoming Jason Statham's total gay boitoi!!!!
Okay, enough nonsense...
Just finished watching all three Transporter movies (having never seen any of them before), and I gotta say it, Statham is the shit, and the candy-assed Bostonian sissy (aka Matt Damon) who weakly portrayed Bourne needs to take a big, honking whiff.
I can't believe he wasn't even ****ing considered to be Bond, but in all honesty, I certainly understand why Craig got the nod, given the uber-violence Statham happily dishes out.
Just have to say it, kids: If I didn't love the va-jay-jay as much as I do, I could easily see myself spending the next 5 years rubbing this bad-assed mofo's feet in exchange for close-combat fighting lessons (or his agent and trainer's phone numbers).
Say what you will, a conservative acknowledges excellence...only the libtard rewards projection.
Have I mentioned yet, that it's good to have you back, even if the time off has made you a bit fruity? :-) This place was damned boring without you, HNC. :cheers1:
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Have I mentioned yet, that it's good to have you back, even if the time off has made you a bit fruity? :-) This place was damned boring without you, HNC. :cheers1:
Fruity hell....don't EVER trust me around your women. :-) :cheersmate:
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Fruity hell....don't EVER trust me around your women. :-) :cheersmate:
You can't have him, Jason that is. Because he is already spoken for. :drool:
I have first dibs. I declared em a long time ago!
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Fruity hell....don't EVER trust me around your women. :-) :cheersmate:
Why?? You ain't all THAT!! :tongue:
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Why?? You ain't all THAT!! :tongue:
Bullshit.
Just ask Brunhilda why the **** she's still pissed at men after 2000 ****ing years. :lmao:
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Like, this is the GR8TST thing that has EVR happened to moi!!!!!!
Blaa Blaa Bla... total gay boitoi!!!!...blaa blaa blaa...
Crocs.
nuf' said.
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Crocs.
nuf' said.
Barbie Benton's Playboy centerfold and an old gym sock were witnesses at my first orgasm, you miserable old shit.
So there. :-) :cheersmate:
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Have I mentioned yet, that it's good to have you back, even if the time off has made you a bit fruity? :-) This place was damned boring without you, HNC. :cheers1:
Whaddya mean, "MADE HIM?" He wears ****ING CROCS, for Chrissakes.
Oh, and just to give you a little shower-nozzle masturbation material, HNC:
(http://i3.squidoocdn.com/resize/squidoo_images/590/draft_lens17344071module146190771photo_1294726028statham4.jpg)
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Say that to his face, smartasses...
[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vpwhSTjLHDY[/youtube]
:-)
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What, Kevin Pollak? He's a *****. And you're the one rubbing it out in the shower to Jason Statham, bro--not me.
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What, Kevin Pollak? He's a *****. And you're the one rubbing it out in the shower to Jason Statham, bro--not me.
No need for Lord Statham to make such a vulgar rebuttal, my East Coast friend.
If he doesn't command your respect, then perhaps you'd prefer seeing the Thames for yourself.
Under water.
Tied to a stack of bricks, you impudent whelp! :-) :cheersmate: :fuelfire: :tongue:
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Been to London, wasn't all that impressed, thanks very much.
You know the food sucks when you find yourself at the Hard Rock TWICE in the same week.
ETA: I may reside on the East Coast now, but I'm a very rare individual, one you'll not likely encounter in your travels about town...a NATIVE Californian.
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ETA: I may reside on the East Coast now, but I'm a very rare individual, one you'll not likely encounter in your travels about town...a NATIVE Californian.
Sparky, I hope you already know that I hold you in that high a regard. You're my homie, Spark! :-) :cheersmate: :cheersmate: :cheersmate: :cheersmate:
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Sparky, I hope you already know that I hold you in that high a regard. You're my homie, Spark! :-) :cheersmate: :cheersmate: :cheersmate: :cheersmate:
Can we dispense with the on-line blowjobs? Twice in the same thread? Statham and now Sparky?
Damn. Get a room, already.
:-)
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This thread is going to end up in the short bus before long. :o
This is going to require a martini to go with my :popcorn:
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You all can bite my fat Jason Statham obsessed ass. I have seen EVERY movie he has ever made including Revolver and In The Name of the King. Now that is dedication and love because believe me those were two of the worst movies ever in the history of all mankind. I saw Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels when it was released on VHS. That is all it took. My hubby knows my obsession. He feels the same about that big boobied Selma girl. I will fight you all to the death for a chance to smell his fromunda cheese!
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You all can bite my fat Jason Statham obsessed ass. I have seen EVERY movie he has ever made including Revolver and In The Name of the King. Now that is dedication and love because believe me those were two of the worst movies ever in the history of all mankind. I saw Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels when it was released on VHS. That is all it took. My hubby knows my obsession. He feels the same about that big boobied Selma girl. I will fight you all to the death for a chance to smell his fromunda cheese!
Uh......Mama? I ain't gonna fight you for any of that there cheese, because I don't intend to get close to it to begin with. You'll have to go toe to toe with Gina, because I'm quite sure she'd put the gloves on for a whiff of that stuff.
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Gina would be like stepping on an ant. I am a super evil conservative republican gun owning tea party supporter in the North. It takes so much at this point to even phase me she would be dead before I even woke from my nap.
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Gina would be like stepping on an ant. I am a super evil conservative republican gun owning tea party supporter in the North. It takes so much at this point to even phase me she would be dead before I even woke from my nap.
Gina? Looks to me like the gauntlet just got throwed, and it bitchslapped you right in the chops.
Whatchoo gonna do about it? :popcorn:
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She knows Eupher. She may bring it a little with nasty pictures she steals off the internet but when it all boils down to ass hair and sweat she runs like a hippie runs from a shower.
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She knows Eupher. She may bring it a little with nasty pictures she steals off the internet but when it all boils down to ass hair and sweat she runs like a hippie runs from a shower.
Ass hair? Sweat?
Aren't we back to fromunda cheese?
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You all can bite my fat Jason Statham obsessed ass. I have seen EVERY movie he has ever made including Revolver and In The Name of the King. Now that is dedication and love because believe me those were two of the worst movies ever in the history of all mankind. I saw Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels when it was released on VHS. That is all it took. My hubby knows my obsession. He feels the same about that big boobied Selma girl. I will fight you all to the death for a chance to smell his fromunda cheese!
But did you see Dungeon Siege????
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But did you see Dungeon Siege????
The full title is In The Name of The King: A Dungeon Siege Tale. So yes. I saw it. The whole thing. I didn't even burn my DVD player after it was done. I win.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0460780/
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The full title is In The Name of The King: A Dungeon Siege Tale. So yes. I saw it. The whole thing. I didn't even burn my DVD player after it was done. I win.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0460780/
I own it. :-)
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I do too. I own almost all of his movies. Favorite besides Snatch and LSATSB is Mean Machine.
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Gina would be like stepping on an ant. I am a super evil conservative republican gun owning tea party supporter in the North. It takes so much at this point to even phase me she would be dead before I even woke from my nap.
Yo, dig it....
This is MY ****ing thread, so no hijacking alllowed.
Mama, tell your hubby I've got his chores covered for the next 30 friggin years.
You deserve to spend the next 50 years in a state of perpetual arousal. Nuff said.
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This thread is all kinds of :lmao:
Carry on.
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This thread is all kinds of :lmao:
Carry on.
If all yer gonna do is giggle on the sidelines, then just stay there, Revolution, you moderator you...
As for me, I intend to get mamacags to cop to peeing on the couch out of laughter as quickly as possible. :-)
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If all yer gonna do is giggle on the sidelines, then just stay there, Revolution, you moderator you...
As for me, I intend to get mamacags to cop to peeing on the couch out of laughter as quickly as possible. :-)
And then I will SNATCH Jason away from the both of ya!
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^ :clap
And I will continue to laugh until Mountain Dew spurts out my nose, TYVM, HNC. :tongue:
I personally would have to think LONG, and HARD about my favorite male actors being good enough for what you describe to take place on my end...
I'm drawing a blank.
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The full title is In The Name of The King: A Dungeon Siege Tale. So yes. I saw it. The whole thing. I didn't even burn my DVD player after it was done. I win.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0460780/
They lit the orcs on fire and then flung them out of catapults.
The weather and lighting during the fight scene kept changing.
The chicks in trees...no explanation, no backstory, just chicks in trees.
Should I go on?
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The entire thing was one big huge WTF. I learned about that Uwe Boll then. It had some huge names in it too. What a total shitfest!
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The entire thing was one big huge WTF. I learned about that Uwe Boll then. It had some huge names in it too. What a total shitfest!
What really sucked is I loved to play the game. I thought it was gonna be cool. I thought wrong. I still own it though. :lmao:
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Yo, dig it....
This is MY ****ing thread, so no hijacking alllowed.
Mama, tell your hubby I've got his chores covered for the next 30 friggin years.
You deserve to spend the next 50 years in a state of perpetual arousal. Nuff said.
Bitch Please. There isn't a thread alive that I won't hijack!
If I told him that you would have a huge foul tempered Italian hunting you. He does NOT like to even think about sharing. However, I will tell him that I deserve to spend the next 50 years like that. That will be entertaining.
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Bitch Please. There isn't a thread alive that I won't hijack!
If I told him that you would have a huge foul tempered Italian hunting you. He does NOT like to even think about sharing. However, I will tell him that I deserve to spend the next 50 years like that. That will be entertaining.
Well, yeah, but didja pee on the couch? Inquiring minds want to know!
This thread is doing a serious mojo dangle.
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I'd hit it over and over and over and over again. I loved him in Crank. :drool:
(http://popbytes.com/img/FP_4299227_TRB_Statham_Jason_010210.jpg)
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Okay I think I would hit that. Hard!
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I'd hit it over and over and over and over again. I loved him in Crank. :drool:
Crank 2 sucked.
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Okay I think I would hit that. Hard!
I'd bounce all over that like a basketball at the Final Four :lmao:
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:rofl: Funny!!!
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Been to London, wasn't all that impressed, thanks very much.
You know the food sucks when you find yourself at the Hard Rock TWICE in the same week.
ETA: I may reside on the East Coast now, but I'm a very rare individual, one you'll not likely encounter in your travels about town...a NATIVE Californian.
I absolutely ****in' adore London, of course I don't go there for FOOD. I've been three times, first was for my honeymoon. If you stick to fish and chips and beer at one of the pubs, it's all good.
IMO the museums, churches and cathedrals and The Tower make up for food.
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Okay I think I would hit that. Hard!
Meh. I see more ripped, much handsomer guys on the covers of half my paranormal romance novels. Even the vampires. :tongue:
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Meh. I see more ripped, much handsomer guys on the covers of half my paranormal romance novels. Even the vampires. :tongue:
Whateves.....I just LOVE him! :hyper:
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Jeezus, this thread is dripping with va-jay-jay juices.
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Little risque, right?
Why the hell don't women ever talk openly like this about decent looking guys like me? Always has to be celebs, huh...? HMPH!!
:p :tongue:
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I haven't seen these movies yet but the Crank movies were pretty good. I've wanted to see them but I am so lazy I just wait for whatever comes on cable. Well, that, and I pay for it so...I'm always so happy when something finally comes on I actually want to watch.
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Jeezus, this thread is dripping with va-jay-jay juices.
And most of it's coming from HNC!!!!!!!!!!! Yikes!!!!!!! :o
Hey, HNC?? I think that you've been in Californication far too long......
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Whateves.....I just LOVE him! :hyper:
:tongue: :-)