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The Bar => The Lounge => Topic started by: bijou on June 07, 2010, 10:50:32 AM

Title: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: bijou on June 07, 2010, 10:50:32 AM
Quote
Authorities in Wenatchee, Washington, were surprised to find that the man had managed to sneak a cigarette lighter, cigarette papers, a bag of tobacco the size of a golf-ball, a bottle of tattoo ink, eight tattoo needles, a small baggie of what was thought to be marijuana, and an inch-long smoking pipe into jail by hiding them up himself.

The man was booked into the jail last Wednesday on a disorderly conduct charge, said Chelan County Regional Justice Center administrator Phil Stanley, and nothing was discovered when he was initially strip searched. ...
link (http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/829679-police-astonished-by-rectal-capacity-of-prison-smuggler)

Yet another smuggler with a capacious orifice.  :-)
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: debk on June 07, 2010, 11:58:17 AM
Holy ....crap!   :o



Seriously....not only is it shocking that it would fit....but "he ain't right in the haid" to shove all that stuff up inside. I'm surprised he didn't damage or rip anything apart....


Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: BlueStateSaint on June 07, 2010, 12:46:58 PM
Holy ....crap!   :o



Seriously....not only is it shocking that it would fit....but "he ain't right in the haid" to shove all that stuff up inside. I'm surprised he didn't damage or rip anything apart....




One might speculate on just why he was able to crowd in so much. :o
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: DumbAss Tanker on June 07, 2010, 01:34:12 PM
Well, he should, umm, 'Fit' right in with the jail population... 
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: soleil on June 07, 2010, 05:56:44 PM
Where do you get these stories? ICK!!!!

And really, it must get a work out is all I'm sayin'.
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: Lord Undies on June 07, 2010, 06:01:22 PM
That ain't an anus.  That's a hatchback.
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: debk on June 07, 2010, 06:03:15 PM
That ain't an anus.  That's a hatchback.

 :lmao:

Specialized U-Haul....
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: Boudicca on June 07, 2010, 06:21:38 PM
Well, he should, umm, 'Fit' right in with the jail population... 

Well, we know he's gonna end up someone's bitch and not vice versa, don't we?
Ick.  Don't people know stuff is supposed to go OUT of that orifice, not IN? :puke:
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: The Village Idiot on June 07, 2010, 06:33:18 PM
They were really shocked when a DUmmie pulled a VW bug out!
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: chitownchica on June 07, 2010, 07:37:53 PM
Yikes- reminds me of those pics on rotten.com of various things stuck up there... baby food jar and potato are the only things I can remember, but that's enough.
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: soleil on June 07, 2010, 08:37:44 PM
Yikes- reminds me of those pics on rotten.com of various things stuck up there... baby food jar and potato are the only things I can remember, but that's enough.

This gyno I know was called into surgery to help remove a glass mustard jar from this guy's rectum. He and his wife were getting "freaky". It almost killed him. He had to have a lot of his colon removed to get the thing out. Yikes. Can't imagine why they thought that was a good idea.
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: thundley4 on June 07, 2010, 09:18:52 PM
This gyno I know was called into surgery to help remove a glass mustard jar from this guy's rectum. He and his wife were getting "freaky". It almost killed him. He had to have a lot of his colon removed to get the thing out. Yikes. Can't imagine why they thought that was a good idea.

So it didn't kill him, it just rectum?
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: debk on June 07, 2010, 09:20:40 PM
So it didn't kill him, it just rectum?


grooooaaaaaaaaaaan.  :-)
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: soleil on June 07, 2010, 09:50:02 PM
So it didn't kill him, it just rectum?
[/quote

Rectum damn near killed him!  :o
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: chitownchica on June 08, 2010, 02:12:31 AM
This gyno I know was called into surgery to help remove a glass mustard jar from this guy's rectum. He and his wife were getting "freaky". It almost killed him. He had to have a lot of his colon removed to get the thing out. Yikes. Can't imagine why they thought that was a good idea.

Oh my gosh Soleil- your poor friend! Whatever consenting adults want to do behind closed doors is fine with me, but I reserve the right to laugh and point at those people who get caught up in freakytime :rotf:
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: Toastedturningtidelegs on June 08, 2010, 06:16:49 AM
This gyno I know was called into surgery to help remove a glass mustard jar from this guy's rectum. He and his wife were getting "freaky". It almost killed him. He had to have a lot of his colon removed to get the thing out. Yikes. Can't imagine why they thought that was a good idea.
There was a video online of a guy putting a mason jar in his butt.......It didn't end well! :o :puke:
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: BlueStateSaint on June 08, 2010, 07:21:47 AM
I seem to remember a pic on rotten.com of a woman who was inserting a Coke bottle--the 1 liter variety--into her vagina.  Coke threatened to sue if the pic wasn't removed.  At first, rotten.com just blurred the logo on the bottle, but kept the pic.  Don't know if they ever completely removed the pic.
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: Toastedturningtidelegs on June 08, 2010, 08:09:25 AM
I seem to remember a pic on rotten.com of a woman who was inserting a Coke bottle--the 1 liter variety--into her vagina.  Coke threatened to sue if the pic wasn't removed.  At first, rotten.com just blurred the logo on the bottle, but kept the pic.  Don't know if they ever completely removed the pic.
Have a Coke and a smile! :-)
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: Lord Undies on June 08, 2010, 08:14:11 AM
Have a Coke and a smile! :-)

"I'd like to teach the world to fist"
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: Toastedturningtidelegs on June 08, 2010, 09:24:21 AM
"I'd like to teach the world to fist"
"In perfect harmony"? :-)
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: JohnnyReb on June 08, 2010, 11:11:45 AM
That's one big ass criminal......
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: AllosaursRus on June 08, 2010, 11:54:06 AM
Oh my gosh Soleil- your poor friend! Whatever consenting adults want to do behind closed doors is fine with me, but I reserve the right to laugh and point at those people who get caught up in freakytime :rotf:

I recall a few years ago a Femme had to have a lizard removed from her kitty kat! I thought that was bizarre! This is just.............

Booked for disorderly conduct? Sounds like he planned this! Must be a "small" businessman! Wonder what his "profit" margin is?
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: BlueStateSaint on June 08, 2010, 12:26:03 PM
That's one big ass criminal......

 :thatsright:
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: chitownchica on June 08, 2010, 09:50:39 PM
I recall a few years ago a Femme had to have a lizard removed from her kitty kat! I thought that was bizarre! This is just.............

Booked for disorderly conduct? Sounds like he planned this! Must be a "small" businessman! Wonder what his "profit" margin is?

Wonder if that was Subway Kitty? :rotf:
Title: Re: Police astonished by rectal capacity of prison smuggler
Post by: vesta111 on June 09, 2010, 05:51:21 AM
I seem to remember a pic on rotten.com of a woman who was inserting a Coke bottle--the 1 liter variety--into her vagina.  Coke threatened to sue if the pic wasn't removed.  At first, rotten.com just blurred the logo on the bottle, but kept the pic.  Don't know if they ever completely removed the pic.

OK OK, some where down the line I was told that Hookers overseas douche with Coke, or did at one time.  So perhaps the woman had an extra busy night and needed all that coke.