The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: CC27 on October 26, 2015, 10:01:11 AM
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lapislzi (5,226 posts)
I made a racially insensitive remark at work
As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I realized what a complete idiot I am. How I could possibly have thought such a remark would not be perceived for exactly what it was: insulting. The person about whom I was speaking was understandably deeply offended and angry. I immediately apologized, verbally and in writing. She was having none of it. That is clearly her prerogative.
Naturally I was called into the CEO's office and presented with a written warning which will never, ever go away. Apparently I am lucky to still have a job, and it's only because the CEO chose not to comply with the offended person's demand that I be fired.
The fact that I have been with the company for almost two decades and am a "key player" makes not one bit of difference, nor should it. The fact that I've never said or done anything remotely like this before matters not at all. The fact that other offensive speech (of which there's quite a bit) in our office goes unchallenged, is of no consequence. I said it; I own it; and I will pay for it for the rest of my life. I have never wished more for a "rewind" button to pull those words back into my mouth. I'm not "that person" (even if for a moment I was). I've tried very hard to educate myself from a racist upbringing not to be "that person."
My question to DUers is: how, over time, can I demonstrate my goodwill and atone for my error? Is there anything at all that can be done, now or in the future, to make amends to this person (without seeming like a disgusting suck-up)? Obviously, "think before you open your big mouth" is at the top of that list. You can be sure I'll be hiding under a rock for the next million years, so my mere presence doesn't give offense.
If DU thinks I deserve further excoriation, then bring it. This is not about my comfort level, and never will be. I want to fix my behavior in demonstrable ways. I also want to improve the general tenor of the company so that sexist or or gay "jokes" will not go unchallenged in the future.
We're a smallish company without an HR director, so I'm kind of on my own here. How does, or should, the punishment fit the crime?
Someone? Anyone?
Signed, ashamed.
Oh the drama. You never said what the remark was in the first place.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10027288843
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If DU thinks I deserve further excoriation, then bring it.
You can print out the thread and show it to the CEO as proof of atonement for your sins. I'm sure that will make everything better. :rofl:
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I can only imagine what the "offensive" word was.
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Poor DUmmy. Probably something so insignificant, but technically a micro aggression.
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What a *****.
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What did he say?
Choose 1:
a) "Bless you" (after she sneezed)
b) "All lives matter"
c) "We're in the black for this quarter."
d) "Obama might not be right about X."
e) "I disagree."
f) Saying anything at all
g) Looking in her general direction
h) Existing
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What did he say?
Choose 1:
a) "Bless you" (after she sneezed)
b) "All lives matter"
c) "We're in the black for this quarter."
d) "Obama might not be right about X."
e) "I disagree."
f) Saying anything at all
g) Looking in her general direction
h) Existing
I'm gonna say that the above mentioned DUmmie was in the break room trying to decide between the blueberry muffin and the cheese danish and went "Eeenie...meenie...miney...moe" and that's all it took for the aggrieved party to yell "RACIST!!!!"
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lapislzi (5,229 posts)
8. It was intended to be a jokey compliment
But--I'd appropriated it from African American context, which is a clear no-no.
:whatever:
Which is worse, the cultural appropriation or the use of the word itself?
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Snow Leopard (306 posts)
17. Sounds like you are being
Railroaded to me. Sticks and stones and all that. Not saying a reprimand was wrong but it is only human nature to pick up on others speech and accents. If a large portion get away with saying things then it stands to reason those things will get picked up by others. Of course I believe people are waaaay to easily offended.
Response to Snow Leopard (Reply #17)
Mon Oct 26, 2015, 10:52 AM
Star Member marmar (68,425 posts)
23. Who appointed you arbiter of what people should or shouldn't be offended by?
lulz
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Ya know, maybe if more Progs got the vast over-reaction treatment society might lurch a little toward sanity. Or, at the least, those progs would be too afraid to say anything, a welcome silence.
Offend the perpetually and professionally aggrieved, and you're "branded":
:ownit:
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lapislzi (5,229 posts)
8. It was intended to be a jokey compliment
But--I'd appropriated it from African American context, which is a clear no-no.
I have $5 on "nigga, please" with that brushoff hand-wave thing.
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lapislzi (5,229 posts)
8. It was intended to be a jokey compliment
But--I'd appropriated it from African American context, which is a clear no-no.
Probably said "that was mighty white of you" to the wrong person.
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This is like a Catholic confessional. This person wants a "Do two our father's, three hail Mary's,..." type of answer. Good luck with that, nutso.
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I have $5 on "nigga, please" with that brushoff hand-wave thing.
Yes .... :cheersmate:
... and ...
Probably said "that was mighty white of you" to the wrong person.
Yes ... :cheersmate:
Well done. :lmao:
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I have $5 on "nigga, please" with that brushoff hand-wave thing.
While I would have preferred that one ( :lmao:) it appears "****** rigged" was the offending remark. http://www.democraticunderground.com/10027288843#post66
What did he say?
Choose 1:
a) "Bless you" (after she sneezed)
b) "All lives matter"
c) "We're in the black for this quarter."
d) "Obama might not be right about X."
e) "I disagree."
f) Saying anything at all
g) Looking in her general direction
h) Existing
:rotf:
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Upon being asked if she said "nigga":
lapislzi
66. That is not what I said.
I have never used "nigga" or any of its variations in my life, and I don't expect to start.
I said an asshole thing for a white person to say, even though it's been said about Morgan Freeman and the President, and by people like Spike Lee and Key and Peele, for whom it is presumably OK. I said it because she fixed the printer when nobody else could.
I think you get the idea.
She used the term "afro-engineered"? Really, I got no clue.
.
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Star Member Heddi (17,400 posts)
58. I'm taking that you said something like "Nigga Please"
? Correct
Yeah, that was a pretty asshole thing to do.
ONLY JERKS LIE IN THEIR ALERT MESSAGES. DON'T BE A JERK
Reply to this post
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Response to Heddi (Reply #58)Mon Oct 26, 2015, 01:20 PM
lapislzi (5,233 posts)
66. That is not what I said.
I have never used "nigga" or any of its variations in my life, and I don't expect to start.
I said an asshole thing for a white person to say, even though it's been said about Morgan Freeman and the President, and by people like Spike Lee and Key and Peele, for whom it is presumably OK. I said it because she fixed the printer when nobody else could.
I think you get the idea.
Hmmmmmm. S/h/it keeps hinting but I still have no idea, which says something about me as a conservative. I don't know these things because it would never, ever occur to me to say anything racial, regardless of context.
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I said an asshole thing for a white person to say, even though it's been said about ... the President, and by people like Spike Lee...
I said it because she fixed the printer when nobody else could.
Maybe she called her co-worker who fixed the printer the "black Jesus."
.
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While I would have preferred that one ( :lmao:) it appears "****** rigged" was the offending remark. http://www.democraticunderground.com/10027288843#post66
:rotf:
Hmm..That was my 2nd choice just before ****** rich.
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Star Member gollygee (18,904 posts)
21. You could
see if there's an organization in your area that does anti-racisim training, and then take their training, and give a copy of the certificate of completion to your employer to put in your file.
Maybe the organization gives out participation trophies that you could put on your wall.
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Self-flagellation in the 21st century.
These people are ridiculous.
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Somebody gets it . . .
alcibiades_mystery (32,601 posts)
75. "...for whom it is presumably OK..."
Your claims of contrition are consistently counterbalanced by these snide justifications.
You called somebody a "REDACTED" because they REDACTED. It's not even a correct use of the phrase, which is a literary phrase referring to a stock character in the white imagination. When it is used about Morgan Freeman and President Obama, it's generally being used critically, as a critique of the function of their characters or actions in the white imagination. Ditto the way Spike Lee and Key and Peele use it. They are critiquing a particular representation of blackness in white literary and filmic works.
Your usage of it was just ignorant, and, yes, ridiculously offensive.
Now, I don't know if you should get fired for something like that (probably not, in my view), but you are continuing to justify yourself throughout this thread, including in the OP.
Reasons for redactions: I don't want this coming up on some search and getting you in yet more trouble. You'd be wise to nix this whole thread.
. . . but I still don't. Can anyone clue me in?
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Hmmm... the plot, like NJCher's puke stew, thickens.
"Jungle fever"?
"Dark side of the moon"?
"I thought it would be bigger"?
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I'm tellin' ya it went something like this:
"Girlfriend, you be miraculously fixin' the printer. You is the black Jesus."
Dollars to doughnuts.
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I'm a little late to this party. Was going to suggest "******-rigged".
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Naturally I was called into the CEO's office and presented with a written warning which will never, ever go away.
You mean it will be part of your PERMANENT RECORD????
(http://cdn2.vox-cdn.com/imported_assets/2252589/onoz_omg2.gif)
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Oh the drama. You never said what the remark was in the first place.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10027288843
Probably like this:
[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z2u1bpXVGHE[/youtube]
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You mean it will be part of your PERMANENT RECORD????
(http://cdn2.vox-cdn.com/imported_assets/2252589/onoz_omg2.gif)
:lmao: I had a friend in high school who stayed scared of getting in any trouble because it would go on his permanent record.
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You mean it will be part of your PERMANENT RECORD????
(http://cdn2.vox-cdn.com/imported_assets/2252589/onoz_omg2.gif)
Yet they don't worry about supporting the murder of innocent babies which really goes on their Permanent Record.
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Something about swinging by an address or going out into the field, maybe. It was enough to drive Vester Lee Flanagan to murder.
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Response to cwydro (Reply #83)Mon Oct 26, 2015, 05:55 PM
Star Member Heddi (17,403 posts)
95. He called a coworker a "magic negro"
because they fixed the xerox machine. IT was posted in the original version of post 75,then redacted.
you can see the original version here, if you scroll to the bottom of the screen
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=7289598
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:nelson:
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I wonder if David Ehrenstein had to report to HR. Probably not, since the LA Times published his story anyway.
http://www.latimes.com/la-oe-ehrenstein19mar19-story.html
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I would look up the student but lap is being such a tool in her thread:
Response to JayhawkSD (Reply #6)Mon Oct 26, 2015, 10:13 AM
lapislzi (5,238 posts)
10. I am aware. I mentioned that I grew up in a racist background
I have worked to educate myself and detach myself from the attitudes I grew up with. This is a process, and obviously I have more work to do.
That's one part. Most of my life has been spent being a wiseass, and that doesn't always go well. Obviously I have more work to do. Not every action requires a snarky comment. Sometimes just "thank you" will do.
And, sometimes, we learn the hard way. Thank you for commenting.
South Africa.
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Liberals wake up in the morning looking for a reason to be offended. Betcha it was a fellow lib that took exception.
Liberals disgust me.
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"Magic negro" wasn't the best choice of words. Should have gone with "black Jesus".
Next time she'll know better.
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Liberals wake up in the morning looking for a reason to be offended. Betcha it was a fellow lib that took exception.
Liberals disgust me.
It sucks to be one.
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This is sort of like the extreme opposite of a bouncy...
"I'm so wrong, DU.. forgive me, what kind of things can I do to show how sorry I am?"
Attention whore is all.. probably didn't even happen.
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(http://i237.photobucket.com/albums/ff68/kayaktn/DUmmies/naggers_zpstmwsrwet.jpg)
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"Magic Negro"?
What a terrible bouncy. The phrase doesn't fit the context.
I suspect the DUmbshit is lying.
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I wonder if David Ehrenstein had to report to HR. Probably not, since the LA Times published his story anyway.
http://www.latimes.com/la-oe-ehrenstein19mar19-story.html
He probably just blamed it on Rush like everyone else did.
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I have $5 on "nigga, please" with that brushoff hand-wave thing.
(http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c387/rsoh2k4/NIGER-PLEASE.jpg)
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(http://i31.photobucket.com/albums/c387/rsoh2k4/NIGER-PLEASE.jpg)
:muahaha: :ohsnap:
And, there's poor Niger Innis, pleased victim beneficiary of his parents' name choice. No wonder he became a Democrat Republican!
:coffee:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Niger_Innis
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I swear any and all words are considered racists to those trying to create problems.
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:muahaha: :ohsnap:
And, there's poor Niger Innis, pleased victim beneficiary of his parents' name choice. No wonder he became a Democrat Republican!
:coffee:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Niger_Innis
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v675/thundley4/******innis_zpswwayoftg.jpg)
http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/outrage/innis.asp
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(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v675/thundley4/******innis_zpswwayoftg.jpg)
http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/outrage/innis.asp
OMG! Gracious of Mr. Innis to accept the apology. Perhaps the lackwitted dummie outing itself for making some stupid micro aggressive comment to a perpetually outraged co-worker fellow waste of good oxygen, should reconsider its pig ****ingly blind adherence to the party of tolerance, ya know, the same critters who were so understanding of good manners and a vocabulary that presumes more than an ESL skill level, howled and threw poop until that poor professor resigned over using niggardly (CORRECTLY) in a context that had nothing to do with magic anyones!
How niggardly all of this political correctness shit will seem when the Muzzie marauders show up at the express invitation of these genital challenged dimmies and commence to MACRO AGGRESS all over their idiotic carcasses.
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What a *****.
Give that man a cheroot. My sentiments exactly.