Yeah? Well an ellipsis has 3 periods, not 4, ...teach.
Heh! My Mom, the English teacher creature for the last 50 years, who by the way teaches in a private school so she can teach the way she likes, would eat this DumpMonkie a new ass.
Some of my favorites:
Dogs go mad, people get angry. When did you become a canine?
Food gets done, people get finished. I knew you were ignorant, but I never thought you were a vegetable. Perhaps I am mistaken.
Profanity is a sign of ignorance. If you cannot converse with me using proper English, then you are ignorant and I do not desire to waste my time with an ignorant person.
Ain't is not a word. (I got a big Websters unabridged dictionary thrown at me when I looked up "ain't" in Websters one day, back when I was in my teens, and pointed out to her that it was in Webster's. It was always Websters. If it wasn't in there, then it was not a word. That book hurt too! Left a big bruise on my behind.

)
Don't EVER ask her if she can do something if you want the task completed. She will respond in the affirmative and leave it at that. When it doesn't get completed, and you ask her about why it wasn't completed, she will very properly inform you that you never asked her if she WOULD do it, you asked her if she "can" do it.
I send her an email and it comes back corrected in red.
I hate English teachers.