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Offline CC27

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An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« on: March 30, 2010, 08:30:11 AM »
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jmowreader (1000+ posts)  Journal Click to send private message to this author Click to view this author's profile Click to add this author to your buddy list Click to add this author to your Ignore list    Tue Mar-30-10 09:08 AM
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An open letter to the Tea Party activists
   
Dear Tea Party Activists:

As a political observer I am aware the Tea Party is against wasteful government spending and excessive deficits. I therefore propose this Ten Point Plan to solve America's wasteful government spending and excessive deficit problems. You should like all of these programs.

1. Abolish the Marine Corps.
The Marines' mission can be accomplished by the Army. Since the Marines are simply a duplication of effort, they should be eliminated at once. The Marines' historical artifacts will be turned over to the Smithsonian Institution for safekeeping, their bases will be closed and all their personnel will be released. The best Marines may find suitable employment in the remaining branches of service, and the rest will be forced to seek gainful private employment.

2. Give Marijuana the same legal status as Alcohol.
Marijuana is a relatively harmless drug. By legalizing it and releasing all the pot offenders currently rotting in jail, we can save a lot in law enforcement costs. By giving it the same status as booze, millions of private sector jobs will be created. Home Depot and Walmart will make billions selling bedding plants and special marijuana fertilizers, Philip Morris will be able to sell prerolled marijuana cigarettes, Anheuser-Busch will sell bags of weed next to the beer, and millions of smoke shops will open nationwide.

3. End the Iraq War.
Even Republicans are now saying going to war in Iraq was a bad idea. Since Republicans and Democrats agree it's a bad idea, and it costs a billion a day for no good reason, let's end it.

4. Drill Here, Drill Now.
You guys really want to drill for oil in the United States. I agree with you, we should drill in the United States. In fact, I notice by looking at this map there's a nice deposit of oil right under your toilet. Oh...I also checked your deed; you don't own the mineral rights, so no one's going to pay you for the oil well we're going to drill through your bathroom floor. Too bad.

5. Get rid of the Office of Faith Based National Initiatives

6. Eliminate tax deductions for charitable giving.
Almost all charitable giving is to churches. Most of that money is used to support the church itself; relatively little is used to support any outreach work. This makes churches similar to organizations like country clubs, which are joined for pleasurable purposes. The Internal Revenue Code does not allow people to deduct their golfing and drinking, so we have decided to also eliminate the deduction for praying.

7. Eliminate private military contractors by increasing the size of the Army
During the Vietnam War and Operation Desert Storm, the military's combat service support functions were handled by soldiers. In the Iraq and Afghanistan Wars, those same functions are handled by civilians that cost us twice as much as soldiers would have. By requiring those contractors to enlist in the Army and accept a standard military paycheck, we can save a LOT of money.

8. Privatize the roads and sell "Road Subscriptions."

Each driver will be required to pay a monthly "Road Subscription" fee to a Road Subscription Fee Authority. Any driver caught without a Road Subscription box will have his car confiscated and sold. Roads will be maintained by private companies, who will receive the road subscription revenues with the knowledge failing to maintain the roads in a condition acceptable to the government will result in prosecutions and jail time.

9. Take "Corporate Personhood" all the way
The Supreme Court says corporations have the same rights as individuals. Okay, that's fine...but as an individual I can't carry forward tax loss, stay out of prison if something I make kills someone, or rent a mailbox in Nassau to avoid paying income tax.

10. Eliminate tax deductions for churches
Since we eliminated the tax deduction for money given to your church, we also decided to eliminate your church's ability to announce it was exempt from taxes.

I am certain all of these simple suggestions will be pleasing to you.

Regards, a concerned Democrat.

Last but not least three threads on the same topic. I think they are scared with what happened to Cantor. Like shining a light on a cockroach.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x8050591

Offline blitzkrieg_17

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #1 on: March 30, 2010, 08:33:08 AM »
That amount of toxic stupidity ought to kill.
Caught somewhere in time

Offline Wineslob

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #2 on: March 30, 2010, 10:28:57 AM »
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jmowreader (1000+ posts)  Journal Click to send private message to this author Click to view this author's profile Click to add this author to your buddy list Click to add this author to your Ignore list    Tue Mar-30-10 09:08 AM
Original message
An open letter to the Tea Party activists
   
Dear Tea Party Activists:

As a political observer I am aware the Tea Party is against wasteful government spending and excessive deficits. I therefore propose this Ten Point Plan to solve America's wasteful government spending and excessive deficit problems. You should like all of these programs.

1. Abolish the Marine Corps.
The Marines' mission can be accomplished by the Army. Since the Marines are simply a duplication of effort, they should be eliminated at once. The Marines' historical artifacts will be turned over to the Smithsonian Institution for safekeeping, their bases will be closed and all their personnel will be released. The best Marines may find suitable employment in the remaining branches of service, and the rest will be forced to seek gainful private employment.


Typical DUmbass response, that is, till we get nuked.

2. Give Marijuana the same legal status as Alcohol.
Marijuana is a relatively harmless drug. By legalizing it and releasing all the pot offenders currently rotting in jail, we can save a lot in law enforcement costs. By giving it the same status as booze, millions of private sector jobs will be created. Home Depot and Walmart will make billions selling bedding plants and special marijuana fertilizers, Philip Morris will be able to sell prerolled marijuana cigarettes, Anheuser-Busch will sell bags of weed next to the beer, and millions of smoke shops will open nationwide.


ONLY a stoner would think up shit like this.


3. End the Iraq War.
Even Republicans are now saying going to war in Iraq was a bad idea. Since Republicans and Democrats agree it's a bad idea, and it costs a billion a day for no good reason, let's end it.

But, but I thought "Dear Leader" was going to end this endless war? What happened?

4. Drill Here, Drill Now.
You guys really want to drill for oil in the United States. I agree with you, we should drill in the United States. In fact, I notice by looking at this map there's a nice deposit of oil right under your toilet. Oh...I also checked your deed; you don't own the mineral rights, so no one's going to pay you for the oil well we're going to drill through your bathroom floor. Too bad.

Now wait a minute, aren't you the same kind of dipshit that wants to end our reliance on foreign oil? So, what is it?

5. Get rid of the Office of Faith Based National Initiatives

How about we get rid of non-secular offices too? Turn about is fairplay..right?

6. Eliminate tax deductions for charitable giving.
Almost all charitable giving is to churches. Most of that money is used to support the church itself; relatively little is used to support any outreach work. This makes churches similar to organizations like country clubs, which are joined for pleasurable purposes. The Internal Revenue Code does not allow people to deduct their golfing and drinking, so we have decided to also eliminate the deduction for praying.

This is just too high on the stupid scale.

7. Eliminate private military contractors by increasing the size of the Army
During the Vietnam War and Operation Desert Storm, the military's combat service support functions were handled by soldiers. In the Iraq and Afghanistan Wars, those same functions are handled by civilians that cost us twice as much as soldiers would have. By requiring those contractors to enlist in the Army and accept a standard military paycheck, we can save a LOT of money.

Sooo, you want the Marines to re-enlist? Another stupid moment.

8. Privatize the roads and sell "Road Subscriptions."

Each driver will be required to pay a monthly "Road Subscription" fee to a Road Subscription Fee Authority. Any driver caught without a Road Subscription box will have his car confiscated and sold. Roads will be maintained by private companies, who will receive the road subscription revenues with the knowledge failing to maintain the roads in a condition acceptable to the government will result in prosecutions and jail time.

We already have toll roads. DUMBSHIT.

9. Take "Corporate Personhood" all the way
The Supreme Court says corporations have the same rights as individuals. Okay, that's fine...but as an individual I can't carry forward tax loss, stay out of prison if something I make kills someone, or rent a mailbox in Nassau to avoid paying income tax.


I think youv'e been working on item # 2 too much.

10. Eliminate tax deductions for churches
Since we eliminated the tax deduction for money given to your church, we also decided to eliminate your church's ability to announce it was exempt from taxes.

Another "too stupid to live", ahhh....   thought?

I am certain all of these simple suggestions will be pleasing to you.

Not really, but you do prove that habitual pot smoking is causing brain damage.

Regards, a stupid Democrat.
“The national budget must be balanced. The public debt must be reduced; the arrogance of the authorities must be moderated and controlled. Payments to foreign governments must be reduced, if the nation doesn't want to go bankrupt. People must again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance.”

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Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #3 on: March 30, 2010, 11:06:34 AM »
Fewer steps.....

No welfare
No foodstamps
No section 8 housing
No government housing
No SS or SSDI
No medicaid or medicare
Flat tax.

Just saved over half the annual budget and laid off over half the federal employee's.

Now that's saving money.





“The American people will never knowingly adopt socialism. But, under the name of ‘liberalism’, they will adopt every fragment of the socialist program, until one day America will be a socialist nation, without knowing how it happened.” - Norman Thomas, U.S. Socialist Party presidential candidate 1940, 1944 and 1948

"America is like a healthy body and its resistance is threefold: its patriotism, its morality, and its spiritual life. If we can undermine these three areas, America will collapse from within."  Stalin

Offline seabelle

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #4 on: March 30, 2010, 11:21:14 AM »
Fewer steps.....

No welfare
No foodstamps
No section 8 housing
No government housing
No SS or SSDI
No medicaid or medicare
Flat tax.

Just saved over half the annual budget and laid off over half the federal employee's.

Now that's saving money

.....and you kept us safe too  :-)

Offline delilahmused

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #5 on: March 30, 2010, 11:25:01 AM »
The fact that this idiot thinks the Marines and the Army are the same shows he's too stupid to have an opinion.

Cindie
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Online SSG Snuggle Bunny

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #6 on: March 30, 2010, 11:30:21 AM »
And the winner of the 2010 Oxygen Deprivation contest is...
According to the Bible, "know" means "yes."

Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #7 on: March 30, 2010, 11:50:36 AM »
Most of those would not work to lower anything or are not nearly as bad as they sound. 

Eliminate the Marines?  Fat chance, they have more PR power than Hollywood, and in the real world the Army and the Marines do not, in fact, do the same thing, though there is a significant overlap...from which both services learn and improve in their own mission envelopes during war.  Besides, who would us doggies have to make fun of, the Air Force and Navy are just too easy.  I might add that this idea doesn't save a damned cent, it just moves all the slots and MTOE from one service to another, which is purely an accounting change that doesn't affect the bottom line. 

Eliminate military contractors and increase the size of the Army to compensate?  A stupid idea because the benefits tail that goes with lower-level contract workers replaced by military (With families) is staggeringly more expensive and less flexible.  At the other end of the spectrum, the contractors we hire as subject matter experts or technicians cannot be replaced by any number of first-term conscripts, and growing them within the military (I.e. having field-grade officers and senior NCOs do this) means planning to have them and their families around for an entire career plus retirement, which is incredibly expensive as opposed to hiring contractors for a few years when you actually need them.   

Road subscriptions?  Well, if it means doing away with the fuel taxes that fulfill that function now, there really isn't a lot of difference.

Eliminate tax exemption for churches and eliminate tax deduction for charitable giving?  Since the churches' operating expenses are all 'Above the line' on their nonprofit org tax returns, all you're talking about is taking away the money they would have otherwise used for 'Good works,' so the net effect of both ideas is to punish the poor, not the churches.

 
Go and tell the Spartans, O traveler passing by
That here, obedient to their law, we lie.

Anything worth shooting once is worth shooting at least twice.

Offline docstew

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #8 on: March 30, 2010, 12:08:32 PM »
Most of those would not work to lower anything or are not nearly as bad as they sound. 

Eliminate the Marines?  Fat chance, they have more PR power than Hollywood, and in the real world the Army and the Marines do not, in fact, do the same thing, though there is a significant overlap...from which both services learn and improve in their own mission envelopes during war.  Besides, who would us doggies have to make fun of, the Air Force and Navy are just too easy.  I might add that this idea doesn't save a damned cent, it just moves all the slots and MTOE from one service to another, which is purely an accounting change that doesn't affect the bottom line. 

Eliminate military contractors and increase the size of the Army to compensate?  A stupid idea because the benefits tail that goes with lower-level contract workers replaced by military (With families) is staggeringly more expensive and less flexible.  At the other end of the spectrum, the contractors we hire as subject matter experts or technicians cannot be replaced by any number of first-term conscripts, and growing them within the military (I.e. having field-grade officers and senior NCOs do this) means planning to have them and their families around for an entire career plus retirement, which is incredibly expensive as opposed to hiring contractors for a few years when you actually need them.   

Road subscriptions?  Well, if it means doing away with the fuel taxes that fulfill that function now, there really isn't a lot of difference.

Eliminate tax exemption for churches and eliminate tax deduction for charitable giving?  Since the churches' operating expenses are all 'Above the line' on their nonprofit org tax returns, all you're talking about is taking away the money they would have otherwise used for 'Good works,' so the net effect of both ideas is to punish the poor, not the churches.

 

Upon publication of the picture of the flag on Iwo Jima, the Secretary of the Navy remarked "that photograph guarantees the existence of the Marine Corps for the next 100 years"

Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #9 on: March 30, 2010, 12:16:34 PM »
He wasn't wrong, and that's not a bad thing.  God bless their rockheaded li'l hearts!   :cheersmate:
Go and tell the Spartans, O traveler passing by
That here, obedient to their law, we lie.

Anything worth shooting once is worth shooting at least twice.

Offline mamacags

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #10 on: March 30, 2010, 12:28:32 PM »
Do they not even know what the marines do? Of course they don't. If we want a diplomats house decorated we can send in the Army. If we need a city burned to the ground we send in the marines.* dumbasses









*Please don't kill me Army guys.  I just dated more Marines in my past life.
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Offline jinxmchue

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #11 on: March 30, 2010, 01:14:32 PM »
That amount of toxic stupidity ought to kill.

Well, DUmmies have been acclimated to it for quite a while, so it doesn't affect them.

Offline jinxmchue

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #12 on: March 30, 2010, 01:15:27 PM »
The fact that this idiot thinks the Marines and the Army are the same shows he's too stupid to have an opinion.

Cindie

To a liberal, the armed forces are all the same show.

Offline Ralph Wiggum

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #13 on: March 30, 2010, 01:43:48 PM »
An open letter to DUmmy jmowreader:

You are a complete DUmbass. :mental:
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Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #14 on: March 30, 2010, 01:48:52 PM »
Do they not even know what the marines do? Of course they don't. If we want a diplomats house decorated we can send in the Army. If we need a city burned to the ground we send in the marines.* dumbasses









*Please don't kill me Army guys.  I just dated more Marines in my past life.

Actually the diplomats are the responsibility of the Marines.  They probably lied to you about some other stuff as well.

 :evillaugh:
Go and tell the Spartans, O traveler passing by
That here, obedient to their law, we lie.

Anything worth shooting once is worth shooting at least twice.

Offline Karin

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #15 on: March 30, 2010, 01:59:27 PM »
JohnnyReb:

And no Dept. of Education
No EPA
No 6-fig czars
No govt employees with titles like "Deputy Executive Outreach Director for Community Activities and Organizations, Northeast Division, Section III, Article II." 

Hey DUmbass jmowreader or whoever, I didn't read your stupid long open letter any more than 3 seconds worth. 

Offline Chris

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #16 on: March 31, 2010, 03:06:27 AM »
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2. Give Marijuana the same legal status as Alcohol.

I stopped reading here after I quit laughing about "let the Army take over for the Marine Corps".

I'll try to read the rest of the thread, but I'm not making any promises.
This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate.

Offline Chris

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #17 on: March 31, 2010, 03:43:36 AM »
But wait, there's more...
Quote
  jmowreader  (1000+ posts) 
Tue Mar-30-10 01:24 PM

6. I posit the private sector is FAR less efficient than the government.  Properly managed, a government agency can be VERY efficient. See, the government doesn't worry about profit and loss. so they can take care of their customers properly without a manager running around trying to squeeze every last nickel out of everything. Okay, that seldom happens, but it can.

Contrast that to the "efficient private sector business" Home Depot I tried to buy a lathe at. Went in to buy lathe...

Followed by a stupid story from someone who obviously smokes pot trying to buy a lathe.
This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate.

Offline NHSparky

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Re: An open letter to the Tea Party activists
« Reply #18 on: March 31, 2010, 04:27:15 AM »
Yes, because everyone knows FedEx, DHL, and UPS could never turn a profit without government subsidies.  And the only reason Amtrak exists is because GOVERNMENT rail travel is so much cheaper and convenient than, say, flying.
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