Oh, where the hell is that YouTube video of the 400lb woman at an anti-war protest screaming her head off about how, "WE GOTTA EAT!!!"
And yeah, the Net is a START for some jobs, but certainly not the end-all, be-all. Bottom line, you gotta network and pick up a damned phone, not to mention put out a resume TARGETED to your employer, not just a, "I wanna get PAID!" three-line POS resume (which I've seen, sadly.)