Well, if paid journalists can make pre-season predictions on college football, I think we unpaid journalists can feel free to predict the Top DUmmies of 2013, eighty days before nominations even start (Thanksgiving Eve).
It's a no-brainer that cousin nadin currently is running far ahead of the pack for the top spot, although one's hoping that perennially-high-ranking Taverner has it in him to give her a run for the money.
Given recent events on Skins's island, the brain-damaged primitive is surely destined for at least the third spot.....and besides winning a Top DUmmie, one's sure he's going to win the Steven Dawes award, the "Steve," in a landslide this year. (The "Steve" is awarded the primitive who showed himself his own worst enemy.)
Those'll probably be the top three.
And given other goings-on, the convenience store primitive, the lady from Missouri, might make it into the top ten, but I speculate only the bottom half of the top ten, maybe seventh or eighth or ninth. However, she seems assured of the Robyn McGrath award, the "Rob," the laughingstock award.
And maybe Ugly, the defrocked warped primitive, Warpy, might get up in there, in eighth or ninth or tenth, solely upon her recent allegation that it's "okay" if a pregnant woman uses dangerous drugs, because the infant after being born can be "weaned" off them with no disastrous long-term effects.
Yeah, right.
The rest of the twenty slots for Top DUmmies are pretty much up for grabs.
One's been disheartened by the performance of the sparkling old dude this year; in case one isn't aware, no primitive has shown up in the Top DUmmies more times than our pal Stinky. He's probably inevitable for the bottom half of the top twenty, but he has a chance to catch up--eighty days--and rank in the top ten.
He's got to do it; he's got to end up in the top ten again, damn it.
There's been signs of strong marital discord in the domestic affairs of the sparkling household, and so he just may make it again.
But the biggest (in more ways than one) disappointment by far has been in my fellow Nebraskan, the big guy from Bellevue, Omaha Steve; after shining so brightly the past two years, one doubts he'll even crack the lowest of the top twenty.
