primitive describes worst dinner party of the year

[franksolich]

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018374238

Oh my.

trof (43,575 posts)   Thu Apr 25, 2013, 06:19 PM

Worst dinner party of the year starts in one hour. My house.

A very dear friend's daughter and family are visiting her for a week.

Six...mom. dad, 4 daughters age 2 - 13.

Two are twins.

I can't keep any of their names straight.

Mom and one daughter are vegans.

Two daughters are allergic to gluten.

Another is lactose intolerant.

Our close friend is allergic to garlic.

Gives her the runs.

This crew is very hard to cook for and they aren't much fun either.

Mom is a drama queen, living some kind of soap opera in her head.

It's a long story.

Dad is a very quiet introverted software engineer and does...not...talk.

Miz t., who excels in Cajun, Mexican, Italian, Asian, you-name-it, etc. cuisine, is hard pressed.

Roast chicken for the omnivores, a raft of roasted vegetables for the vegans.

The dinner is an obligation for an old and close friend, and I am very much looking for this evening to be over.
 
I think I'll go fix another Scotch.

Not a whole lot of interesting primitive comments at it.

dixiegrrrrl (30,366 posts)    Thu Apr 25, 2013, 06:30 PM

4. You have my deepest sympathy.

As Garrison Keillor says, ketchup is the mellowing agent.........perhaps a bottle or 2 would not be amiss.

Definitely a bottle of Scotch is needed.

trof (43,575 posts)    Thu Apr 25, 2013, 06:52 PM

8. Maybe I'll force feed kechup to the drama queen.

She sure needs 'mellowing'.

RILib (484 posts)    Thu Apr 25, 2013, 06:52 PM

9. stock up on Amy's frozen dinners and have at it

They have special dinners for everything under the sun.

RebelOne (26,635 posts)    Thu Apr 25, 2013, 07:04 PM

12. Amy's entrees are great for vegans and vegetarians.

I am vegetarian and buy them all the time.

Chan790 (13,571 posts)    Thu Apr 25, 2013, 08:44 PM

16. Serve them all boiled potatoes.

Really. I'm a 5-year vegetarian and intermittent vegan, allergic to a lot of things...and I do not alter my menu to suit other people's whims short of incontrovertible proof of anaphylactic allergy.
 
I'm making a nice dinner of my choosing...and boiled potatoes. You can choose which you'd prefer to eat. I cater for money and I'm not getting paid to cater to you.

alphafemale (13,148 posts)   Thu Apr 25, 2013, 10:37 PM

25. I like this. someone vocalizes an objection to food you have cooked?

Standard reply should be something along the line of "Oh that's too bad. Have some potatoes?"
 
Families that go to someone's house and expect you to cater to three or more dietary whims are the ultimate in rude.

distantearlywarning (4,176 posts)   Thu Apr 25, 2013, 09:19 PM         

20. I feel for you

I had to cook a Christmas Eve dinner like that once.

In my case, the vegan in question did not like any of the vegetables I suggested. It is still not clear to me exactly what she lives on, to be honest. How can you be a vegan and not like vegetables???

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trof (43,575 posts)    Thu Apr 25, 2013, 09:16 PM

18. It's over. Actually wasn't THAT bad.

Hell, who am I kidding?

Yeah it was.

Miz t. outdid herself in preparing foods each could eat.

Bland?

Oh hell yeah.

Bland as it could be.

But 'wholesome'.

Damn, I hate 'wholesome'.

Mixed fruit for 'dessert'.

yuck

And then "Susie can't eat pineapple. She's allergic. Mary 'doesn't' eat blueberries."
 
Anyway...IT'S OVER!

A last Scotch and off to bed.

Thanks for all the commiserations and sympathy.

I damn well deserved it.

[Skul]

Good grief. Just fix a bunch of different stuff.
Put it all on the counter, buffet style.
They can take or pass up whatever. Jeez, that isn't so hard.

[hillneck]

Talk about being a drama queen.   The way this DUmmie is whining and shiveling sounds alot like pot calling the kettle black. 

[IassaFTots]

How rude.  I always try to accommodate my guest's dietary restrictions or likes/dislikes.  I might not omit something completely from the menu, but I will make sure there is an equal substitute.  What's the point of having people over for dinner, and making them uncomfortable?

[Toastedturningtidelegs]

How rude.  I always try to accommodate my guest's dietary restrictions or likes/dislikes.  I might not omit something completely from the menu, but I will make sure there is an equal substitute.  What's the point of having people over for dinner, and making them uncomfortable?

Ugh! This crew sounds like a real pain in the ass though!

[Big Dog]

Real men don't have "dinner parties", but real men with wives or girlfriends tolerate them for our wimminz' sake.

My parties are designed to weed out DUmmies, militant vegans, and pearl clutchers (but I repeat myself). All it takes is one smoked whole pig with a smoked whole chicken in its mouth to clear a room of lefties.

[67 Rover]

Real men don't have "dinner parties", but real men with wives or girlfriends tolerate them for our wimminz' sake.

My parties are designed to weed out DUmmies, militant vegans, and pearl clutchers (but I repeat myself). All it takes is one smoked whole pig with a smoked whole chicken in its mouth to clear a room of lefties.

Don't forget to add the Hush Puppies! YUM

[jtyangel]

Ugh! This crew sounds like a real pain in the ass though!

Surprised they don't need the peanut dust scoured off the walls in case any found its way there from the kitchen lol

[USA4ME]

I'm along the lines of "Eat what's in front of you or go without" myself. Typically if we've had people over who have special diets, they'll bring their own food, which is fine.

.

[Big Dog]

Don't forget to add the Hush Puppies! YUM

Yeah! Tell 'em they're made from real puppies.

[GOBUCKS]

Well, this thread is all bouncy fiction, but if such a crew existed they would never be invited into my house.

[Splashdown]

Real men don't have "dinner parties", but real men with wives or girlfriends tolerate them for our wimminz' sake.

My parties are designed to weed out DUmmies, militant vegans, and pearl clutchers (but I repeat myself). All it takes is one smoked whole pig with a smoked whole chicken in its mouth to clear a room of lefties.

*Patiently waiting for an invite...*

 

[Big Dog]

*Patiently waiting for an invite...*

 

My invites say "barbecue gun mandatory". Are you cool with that?

[vesta111]

My invites say "barbecue gun mandatory". Are you cool with that?

Whoever this poor person is, they have my regards and best wishes.  In their position I would have my lawyer call the invited to say I was in need of medical help and taken to Brazil for treatment.  Sorry, the party is off.

My worse dinner party was actually a hoot. Never forger my Dad in a Tux  doing the chicken dance. 

Second worse  was the big flings at the O Club on base.      Darn I had more fun at the Chiefs club and much better food. 

  The people were real, none of this behavior to get a husband boosted up the ladder. once a man became a Chief, it did help if he had a wife that volunteered and worked with the comunity.     If He didn't  his wife like it or not  found thenselves  into the MRS, CHIEF, I have a problem. 

[Ogre]

What a DUmbass, if this is how she treats the child of a "dear friend" I can't imagine what her hospitality is like when dealing with strangers.

[Ballygrl]

Ugh! This crew sounds like a real pain in the ass though!

Why the heck invite a group over that have so many issues with food?

[I_B_Perky]

Why the heck invite a group over that have so many issues with food?

That was my question, BG. Go to a restaurant somewhere. Feed them all salad or something. Tell them to bring their own damned food. Tell them to stay home.

Do any dummies and their families not have any problems?

[Toastedturningtidelegs]

Surprised they don't need the peanut dust scoured off the walls in case any found its way there from the kitchen lol

I think I would just order some 5 dollar pizzas,a couple of 2 liters and a twelve pack and call it done! lol!

[Ballygrl]

I think I would just order some 5 dollar pizzas,a couple of 2 liters and a twelve pack and call it done! lol!

You can't do that because 1 person is lactose intolerant and 1 person needs to eat gluten free LOL.

[jtyangel]

You can't do that because 1 person is lactose intolerant and 1 person needs to eat gluten free LOL.
[/quote


There is two liters and beer for those folks lol

[Firekrakka]

I think I would just order some 5 dollar pizzas,a couple of 2 liters and a twelve pack and call it done! lol!

Amen! I get so tired of petty complaints.

[BattleHymn]

That was my question, BG. Go to a restaurant somewhere.

I've been to a restaurant with people like that before.  I was embarrassed to even be seen at the same table.

I'm with GOBUCKS on this one.  The best offense in this situation is a good defense.  Just avoid the situation altogether.