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Author Topic: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman  (Read 1370 times)

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Offline Skul

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The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« on: July 08, 2012, 01:38:55 PM »
A DUmmie with a sense of humor.  :rotf:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018149720
Quote
Sun Jul 8, 2012, 01:08 PM
 zappaman (5,195 posts)

 Holding in the fart makes it smell worse.
Farts are perhaps the internet’s favorite thing after cats. Be it videos of all sorts of animals farting to websites which contain hundreds of fart sounds, we enjoy farts. The composition and the science behind a fart is fairly simple but the humor associated with it is timeless. It is perhaps the sounds it makes or the fact that it can be used in various pranks. However, in high society, farts are considered ill mannered and only the past time of the uncouth. Consequently, a lot of people try to hold them in when in the company of a stranger or someone you respect or are trying to impress.

Though there are many theories concerning holding in farts. One says that you could fill yourself up with all that un-discharged gas and spontaneously combust. On a more serious note, however, holding in gas causes a set of problems. One being that the fart will get smellier by the minute the longer you hold it in. Farts consist of a number of gases like Oxygen, Hydrogen, Nitrogen, Methane etc. Most of these gases can be absorbed in the blood stream but nitrogen does not. The longer you hold a fart, the more nitrogen will collect in the fart and this makes it smellier. Besides this, doctors believe that holding in farts does not cause any problem besides a stomach ache.

http://www.whattheffacts.com/smell-of-fart/
I'm waiting for Gnads to show up and argue.  :whatever:

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Response to zappaman (Original post)
Sun Jul 8, 2012, 01:40 PM
 Turbineguy (15,021 posts)
5. So it's a good idea to hold it
in until you are inside the elevator and the doors have closed.
Only if Gnads is in there with you.
Then again, would anyone notice the odor of the patoot?
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Then-Chief Justice John Marshall observed, “Between a balanced republic and a democracy, the difference is like that between order and chaos.”

John Adams warned in a letter, “Remember democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet, that did not commit suicide.”

Offline Bad Dog

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #1 on: July 08, 2012, 01:43:44 PM »
Quote from: Skul on July 08, 2012, 01:38:55 PM
A DUmmie with a sense of humor.  :rotf:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018149720I'm waiting for Gnads to show up and argue.  :whatever:
Only if Gnads is in there with you.
Then again, would anyone notice the odor of the patoot?

Huh?  I wonder if this could be Beaner Parsnips problem.
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Offline Big Dog

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #2 on: July 08, 2012, 02:27:04 PM »
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Response to zappaman (Original post)
Sun Jul 8, 2012, 01:40 PM
 Turbineguy (15,021 posts)
5. So it's a good idea to hold it
in until you are inside the elevator and the doors have closed.

But what if there's a midget on the elevator?
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Government is the negation of liberty.
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CAVE FVROREM PATIENTIS.

Offline Skul

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #3 on: July 08, 2012, 03:04:59 PM »
Quote from: Big Dog on July 08, 2012, 02:27:04 PM
But what if there's a midget on the elevator?
Ahem....
Quote
Only if Gnads is in there with you.
Then again, would anyone notice the odor of the patoot?
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Then-Chief Justice John Marshall observed, “Between a balanced republic and a democracy, the difference is like that between order and chaos.”

John Adams warned in a letter, “Remember democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet, that did not commit suicide.”

Offline Big Dog

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #4 on: July 08, 2012, 03:29:10 PM »
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Government is the negation of liberty.
  -Ludwig von Mises

CAVE FVROREM PATIENTIS.

Offline Skul

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #5 on: July 09, 2012, 08:16:56 AM »
Quote from: Big Dog on July 08, 2012, 03:29:10 PM
:thatsright:

Roger, out.
:lmao:

Quote
Response to zappaman (Original post)
Sun Jul 8, 2012, 02:45 PM
 BlueJazz (16,559 posts)
13. I'd put my dog up against anyone . ...Even the other dogs in the neighborhod think "He smells funny"
Gnads will accept that challenge.
« Last Edit: July 09, 2012, 08:19:40 AM by Skul »
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Then-Chief Justice John Marshall observed, “Between a balanced republic and a democracy, the difference is like that between order and chaos.”

John Adams warned in a letter, “Remember democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet, that did not commit suicide.”

Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #6 on: July 09, 2012, 08:29:00 AM »
Pickled boiled eggs and beer...nuff said if you've ever been trapped in a car with a drunk the day after the night before.
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Offline Ballygrl

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #7 on: July 09, 2012, 11:40:06 AM »
I refuse to call zappaman absolutely adorable on an open board.
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Offline Big Dog

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #8 on: July 09, 2012, 06:03:01 PM »
Quote
Response to zappaman (Original post)
Sun Jul 8, 2012, 02:45 PM
 BlueJazz (16,559 posts)
13. I'd put my dog up against anyone . ...Even the other dogs in the neighborhod think "He smells funny"

I used to have a black-and-tan Doberman Pinscher named Zeus. I adopted him from a family who had him cropped, but raised him as the family dog and children's chewtoy. That dog could do exactly one thing well...pass gas, which is why the family was so eager to give him away.

I bought a sheriff's star for his collar, and he rode with me at work. I had to drive with the windows down even in the winter, snow blowing in the open windows of my patrol car because he smelled so bad.

I called him, "Zeus the Farting Dog". In his whole life, that dog only bit one person- me- and that was as I carried him out of my house when it was on fire. I forgave him for that.

Damn, I loved that stinky old bastard.
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Government is the negation of liberty.
  -Ludwig von Mises

CAVE FVROREM PATIENTIS.

Offline Skul

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #9 on: July 09, 2012, 06:13:53 PM »
Blew one in the car one day.
Had to pull over and get out.
Car was a convertible, and the top was down.
It was nasty.
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Then-Chief Justice John Marshall observed, “Between a balanced republic and a democracy, the difference is like that between order and chaos.”

John Adams warned in a letter, “Remember democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet, that did not commit suicide.”

Offline SSG Snuggle Bunny

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #10 on: July 09, 2012, 09:51:43 PM »
[youtube=425,350]74AzD2wfu-g[/youtube]
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Offline Skul

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #11 on: July 10, 2012, 08:56:47 AM »
Quote from: SGT Snuggle Bunny on July 09, 2012, 09:51:43 PM
[youtube=425,350]74AzD2wfu-g[/youtube]
I just watched that here at work.
Kind of wish I had the sound turned down.

No I don't. :lmao:
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Then-Chief Justice John Marshall observed, “Between a balanced republic and a democracy, the difference is like that between order and chaos.”

John Adams warned in a letter, “Remember democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet, that did not commit suicide.”

Offline Jasonw560

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #12 on: July 10, 2012, 09:25:32 AM »
After I eat sauerkraut, my family has to send a canary into the room (like miners used to do) to see if it would die or not. We've spent a small fortune on canaries.
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Offline BlueStateSaint

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #13 on: July 10, 2012, 10:12:31 AM »
When I was a kid, I remember feeding our Siberian Husky some sauerkraut that had been on pork chops.  The next morning was lethal in the kitchen and family room.
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Offline Skul

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #14 on: July 10, 2012, 05:58:46 PM »
No way was I going to pass this up.  :lmao:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1166383
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ellisonz (19,941 posts)    Wed May 9, 2012, 01:15 AM

 Hitler Used Cocaine and Had Fart Problem, Medical Records Show
Rossella Lorenzi, Discovery News
Date: 06 May 2012 Time: 07:10 PM ET

Adolf Hitler farted uncontrollably, used cocaine to clear his sinuses, ingested some 28 drugs at a time and received injections of bull testicle extracts to bolster his libido.

The startling revelations come from Hiltler's medical records, now up for auction at Alexander Historical Auctions of Stamford, Conn. (full catalogues here and here).

Bidding for the documents -- which include ten X-rays of various views of the dictactor's skull, the results of several electroencephalogram (EEG) tests and sketches of the inside of his nose -- ends Tuesday and Wednesday.

The cache consists of a 47-page account compiled by his six chief physicians, each specializing in different areas of treatment, and of a 178-page report dated June 12, 1945, which was compiled by Dr. Erwin Giesing, while he was interned by American forces.

More: http://www.livescience.com/20118-adolf-hitler-medical-records.html1
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Then-Chief Justice John Marshall observed, “Between a balanced republic and a democracy, the difference is like that between order and chaos.”

John Adams warned in a letter, “Remember democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet, that did not commit suicide.”

Offline J. M. Pyne

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Re: The proof is in the poot.....Zappaman
« Reply #15 on: July 11, 2012, 09:32:23 AM »
I think Zappaman has changed.  He doesn't seem to be quick with a NADS response.  Did he change to get on MIRT or did MIRT change him?
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