For Most Mothers, Stay-at-Home Choice Isn’t a Luxury (ya hear that, Mrs. Romney?

[formerlurker]

alp227 

For Most Mothers, Stay-at-Home Choice Isn’t a Luxury (ya hear that, Mrs. Romney?)

Last edited Sun Apr 15, 2012, 04:12 PM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

 The layoff notice was not a complete surprise. At the shipping center in Denver where Jeanine Maez filled mail orders, the trend had been toward paperless transactions.
 
But how Mrs. Maez reacted to being unemployed in 2004 was a revelation, even to herself: she decided not to look for a new job in favor of staying home full time with her five children, the youngest of whom, a son, is 11.
 
“The years of ‘winging it’ with my husband in terms of taking care of the kids had been too hard, and I was tired,” she said. “And my youngest son, who is autistic, needed his mama.”
 
To make ends meet, Mrs. Maez, 44, sold her car, paid off her credit card debt, and disciplined herself to spend more modestly on clothes and household goods. Her husband, a private investigator, took a second job selling insurance. “Whatever it takes to make a buck,” she said. “My sweet honey struggles a lot to make it work for us.”
 
In multiple ways, Mrs. Maez is the face of modern stay-at-home motherhood in America, where 65 percent of married women who stay home with children under 18 years old live in households that earn less than $75,000 a year, according to the most recent data from the United States Census Bureau.
 
full: http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/16/us/politics/ann-romneys-choice-not-typical-of-stay-at-home-mothers.html

http://www.democraticunderground.com/101624512



Psssst - it was Obama who referred to it as a luxury...

[BEG]

Yawn...shut up you losers.

When I first started to stay at home I watched kids so I could afford to stay home with my children. Now we can affordthor me to stay home without bringing in extra income. My youngest child is 13, my oldest 23 (graduated college last year).  We have another graduating high school this year and starting college in the fall.

I will stay home until our youngest has graduated high school.  My husband and I felt it was better for our kids to have me home when they were home.  I may go back to school, get an office job or work at Hobby Lobby or something for the fun of it. I may donate my time instead or I may decide not to do anything.  If something drastic happens to our income and I need to go to work ASAP I will.  I also don't see a problem with women who have to work or want to work. Some women wouldn't be good stay at home mom's as some are better being working mom's. The difference is liberals (especially liberal women) have to tear apart women who want to be home with their children and either have to sacrifice to do so...or just choose to do so.  You demean it. You can deny it all you want, we have too many examples to prove the way liberal women think.

You people are not going to win this argument. Most people identify with the way the Romney's have raised their family (even if you think they are evil rich Mormons) than the way the Obama's have. This has nothing to do with how rich either family is, and both are, even if you will never admit that Obama is and was before he ran for President.

Most families don't have Reverand Wright as their pastor for 20 years (much less marry them and baptize their kids) or have associations with radical people. You can tell youself that they weren't radical but ask yourself why they felt the need to play down their associations?  Most people aren't like you people. Hell, even Omaha Steve is running away from who he is with his city council run.  I wonder why he isn't screaming his love of socialism and the other batshit craziness you people talk about on DU. Take a good look at his site, notice what is missing. Be honest with yourselves...you don't actually have to admit it in public.

After you take a look at his site, go over to the following site and compare...

www.electstevedawes.com 

[Freeper]

The thing is, more people have that "luxury" than they will admit, a lot of times neither parent wants to make the sacrifice to stay home with the kids and put off having expensive vacations or getting the newest IPAD every 2 years. If they make that choice that is their business, but it doesn't negate the fact that people can do it if they chose to do so.

[obumazombie]

The thing is, more people have that "luxury" than they will admit, a lot of times neither parent wants to make the sacrifice to stay home with the kids and put off having expensive vacations or getting the newest IPAD every 2 years. If they make that choice that is their business, but it doesn't negate the fact that people can do it if they chose to do so.

So true. If you look at the added expenses of putting the second spouse to work, it is almost always a wash at best compared to the extra income.

[thundley4]

The thing is, more people have that "luxury" than they will admit, a lot of times neither parent wants to make the sacrifice to stay home with the kids and put off having expensive vacations or getting the newest IPAD every 2 years. If they make that choice that is their business, but it doesn't negate the fact that people can do it if they chose to do so.

With the cost of gas in recent years, both parents working is wasted because it requires more gas, money for the sitters/preschool and other assorted costs of working.  It's not even a break even proposition sometimes.


That said, my mom worked, but her and my dad's were close and their schedules matched well enough for one car to work.  My sitters were all stay at home moms with children my age, so most of the time it was like extended play dates.

[BattleHymn]

With the cost of gas in recent years, both parents working is wasted because it requires more gas, money for the sitters/preschool and other assorted costs of working.  It's not even a break even proposition sometimes.

 

The above isn't the case for everyone, but when we get around to having a family, the spousal unit will be leaving her job, and staying at home.  We'll save more money that way. 

It would be impossible for a primitive to understand or calculate the above maths, since all of their attempts at calculating always utilize the Potato Theorem.

[seahorse513]

If a family cann afford it , that is great. Sometimes it can be iffy...
For example, my eldest niece, has two little ones(3 and 1 1/2) If she was to put both girls in daycare, get a job(gas, car wear and tear) For them it wouldn't be worth it. She also takes care of two other little girls (3 & 4) Another friend of theirs takes care of her two (1 1/2 and 4) and another little boy. Neither girl charges an arm and a leg to take care of other children, so it is a win-win all around.

[jukin]

Well yeah but not everyone can be a welfare mother.

[obumazombie]

Well yeah but not everyone can be a welfare mother.

Especially male lesbians. The bigots.

[AllosaursRus]

The thing is, more people have that "luxury" than they will admit, a lot of times neither parent wants to make the sacrifice to stay home with the kids and put off having expensive vacations or getting the newest IPAD every 2 years. If they make that choice that is their business, but it doesn't negate the fact that people can do it if they chose to do so.

Not to mention the Libs that actually "kill" their families thru abortion! Pretty easy to make that choice when you continually murder your children so you never have to confront it! DipShits!

[Zeus]

The thing is, more people have that "luxury" than they will admit, a lot of times neither parent wants to make the sacrifice to stay home with the kids and put off having expensive vacations or getting the newest IPAD every 2 years. If they make that choice that is their business, but it doesn't negate the fact that people can do it if they chose to do so.

That is so true. Lots of folks problem isn't a lack of income it's what they choose to do with that income. If more folks would simply Prioritize and employ a little fiscal constraint they'd be amazed what they could accomplish.

In The Millionaire Next Door, read by Cotter Smith, Stanley (Marketing to the Affluent) and Danko (marketing, SUNY at Albany) summarize findings from their research into the key characteristics that explain how the elite club of millionaires have become "wealthy." Focusing on those with a net worth of at least $1 million, their surprising results reveal fundamental qualities of this group that are diametrically opposed to today's earn-and-consume culture, including living below their means, allocating funds efficiently in ways that build wealth, ignoring conspicuous consumption, being proficient in targeting marketing opportunities, and choosing the "right" occupation. It's evident that anyone can accumulate wealth, if they are disciplined enough, determined to persevere, and have the merest of luck. In The Millionaire Mind, an excellent follow-up to the highly successful first analysis of how ordinary folks can accumulate wealth, Stanley interviews many more participants in a much more comprehensive study of the characteristics of those in this economic situation. The author structures these deeper details into categories that include the key success factors that define this group, the relationship of education to their success, their approach to balancing risk, how they located themselves in their work, their choice of spouse, how they live their daily lives, and the significant differences in the truth about this group vs. the misplaced image of high spenders.

[obumazombie]

That was a great read of a book Zeus. I can't remember if I read the sequel. It's just amazing how fiscal literacy, business thinking, and the right vehicle can make all the difference. The biggest problem is, to get to the goal you have to sacrifice in a disciplined way. And you may have to sacrifice in areas that are a stretch out of most peoples comfort zones. Thanks for posting !

[Zeus]

That was a great read of a book Zeus. I can't remember if I read the sequel. It's just amazing how fiscal literacy, business thinking, and the right vehicle can make all the difference. The biggest problem is, to get to the goal you have to sacrifice in a disciplined way. And you may have to sacrifice in areas that are a stretch out of most peoples comfort zones. Thanks for posting !

Don't necessarily even have to sacrifice, prioritize yes. Making up for the wrong choices(priority) might require some sacrifice,of course to me sacrificing means doing without a needed something temporarily.

[jukin]

Don't necessarily even have to sacrifice, prioritize yes. Making up for the wrong choices(priority) might require some sacrifice,of course to me sacrificing means doing without a needed something temporarily.

Requires only a modicum of self discipline. I put myself through school but never went on a vacation, I worked. Rarely went out drinking at the clubs and ate on the cheap. None of these qualities are present in today's college students. Most do not even have a summer job but with the 0conomy that's not all their fault. They go on two week out of country vacos and refuse to be seen 'caught dead" in any car older than 5 years. I have many young adults of friends that are this way. Rare to see a self starter. This my friend is what getting "FREE money" for going to school does and why they come out owing what a house costs....in 0bama's housing market. 

[Zeus]

Requires only a modicum of self discipline. I put myself through school but never went on a vacation, I worked. Rarely went out drinking at the clubs and ate on the cheap. None of these qualities are present in today's college students. Most do not even have a summer job but with the 0conomy that's not all their fault. They go on two week out of country vacos and refuse to be seen 'caught dead" in any car older than 5 years. I have many young adults of friends that are this way. Rare to see a self starter. This my friend is what getting "FREE money" for going to school does and why they come out owing what a house costs....in 0bama's housing market.  

My son works full time and goes to school full time. He received Dual scholarships for school and is set to graduate next fall with no debt and in the neighborhood of 20 grand saved. He plans on using that money for pursuing his masters if he doesn't acquire scholarships(or whatever they call them for that level) .

I have to constrain myself from calling him a professional student because he does have a job.