Subject: : APHORISM: A SHORT, POINTED SENTENCE
EXPRESSING A WISE OR CLEVER OBSERVATION
OR A GENERAL TRUTH.
1. The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow.
2. Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will
make him wag his tail.
3. If you don't have a sense of humor, you
probably don't have any sense at all.
4. Seat belts are not as
confining as wheelchairs.
5. A good time to keep your mouth shut
is when you're in deep water.
6. How come it takes so little time
for a child who is afraid of the dark to become a
teenager who wants to stay out all night?
7. Business conventions are important
because they demonstrate how many people a company
can operate without.
8. Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger
than everyone else looks?
9. Scratch a cat and you will have a
permanent job.
10. No one has more driving ambition than the boy
who wants to buy a car.
11. There are no new sins; the old ones
just get more publicity.
12. There are worse things than getting
a call for a wrong number at 4 AM. It could be a right
number..
13. No one ever says 'It's only a game.' when their team
is winning.
14. I've reached the age where the happy hour is a
nap.
15. Be careful reading the fine print. There's no way you're
going to like it.
16. The trouble with bucket seats is that not
everybody has the same size bucket.
17. Do you realize that in
about 40 years, we'll have thousands of old ladies
running around with tattoos?
(And rap music will be the Golden Oldies!)
18. Money
can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable
to cry in a Corvette than in a Yugo.
19. After 50, IF you don't wake up
aching in every joint, you are probably dead!!
20. Always be yourself
because the people that matter don't mind, and the
ones who mind, don't matter!
