On the record, my old mole Fluke a Snooker tried to get Camel-toe Hairhumps to be the front-runner, and she may well be the candidate they come up with. Beto O'Rourke was going to parlay his big senate loss into a presidential run, but he's run into a snag. You see, the Democrats have finally figured out he's a white Irishman named Beto who resembles the Lucky Leprechaun more than the Frito Bandito / slash / MS-13 wannabe Beto, and you know the only thing worse than being Orange is being a white male.
If Camel-toe can keep her mouth shut except on stump speeches in Mendocino and Palo Alto, then she should easily be the nominee as she checks all the important checkboxes: black, Muslim, anti-capitalist, anti-energy, and especially, anti-American.
Meanwhile, my real-world BantheGOP mole, Alexandria ¡Ocasio!-Cortez, is moving along quite swimmingly.