For the geeks among us...
A default Sans Serif font walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve your type here!"
Great one. LOL I thought you were in bed. (it's not innuendo if I stop here)
I see you were all anxious to get rid of me too. Now I know why women slap you. 
You got me all wrong. But I can't respond properly in an "innuendo free" thread. I've tied my hands.
Perfect!
Here is another funny....
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his cell phone and calls emergency services.
He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator in a calm, soothing voice replies: "Take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard.
Back on the phone, the hunter says, "OK, now what?"
HA!!
Reminds me of the hunter who brought tennis shoes on his hunting trip. His buddy says, "Why tennis shoes on a hunting trip?" The hunter says, "In case of bears". Buddy says, "You can't outrun a bear". The hunter replies, "i know, but with these on I can outrun you"
