Assault Pressure Cooker Ban

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Received in an email:

A congressional investigative committee proposed a ban on 4 quart or greater pressure cookers, and limits their purchase to one per person per year, but only to those who show a PCOID (Pressure Cooker Owners Identification Card).

Such card would be issued only after successful background checks from the Department of Homeland Security, the Border Patrol, Martha Stewart Online, and the Food Network.

Notably, politicians chimed in with comments:

"We have to protect people from the risks of mentally ill persons carrying high capacity pressure cookers," said Diane Feinstein.

"No one needs an assault pressure cooker," said Senator Harry Reid ( D- NV ).

California Representative Nancy Pelosi sponsored the legislation with the comment "I will include legislation that anyone possessing a pressure cooker within 200 yards of a school, government building, bank, Wal-Mart, Starbucks or Jack-in-the-Box will be subject to double the regular criminal penalty, and be incarcerated in a for-profit prison in California or even darkest Utah ."

2016 presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton said, "No real sportsman needs a large capacity pressure cooker. Real men do just fine with small cap cookers, sauce pans or even crock pots".

President Barak Obama said, " Me too, I was just going to say that. I told Michelle, I told Joe Biden, I told anyone who would listen, I will set up a committee. I will go on TV. I will make speeches, I will get angry and whine on live broadcast news shows on MSNBC. I am not allowed by law to have direct contact with my PAC but I hope they pick up on this issue and run ads in support of this too. Anyone caught using Pressure Cookers illegally will have crossed a red line and it will become a game changer. However, let me be perfectly clear, we must not rush to judgment of Muslims who regularly use pressure cookers in preparation of their food under 'hall' dietary rules, and we must not under any circumstances accuse such peaceful followers of Islam of acts of, er, uh, civil disorder or workplace violence without thorough investigation of the facts and whether or not there was a video tape mocking Mohammed, or some other provocation causing them to react. At the same time let me assure the American people that the full weight and force of my government will take all measures to find anyone who commits a crime using pressure cookers and bring them to justice, no matter how long it takes or how much it costs or how many times I have to fly around the country, use people as props, or go on TV and talk about it, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah........................"