As many of you know, during the last presidential election it was implied that everyone would get a unicorn if The Changer was elected. Unfortunately, before any of the unicorns could be delivered they all tragically died in a fire caused by The Changer's teleprompter. I thought that was the end of the unicorn saga, but it seems as if I was mistaken.
Due to the closeness of the polls and psychic cries from DU, I have word that The Changer's people are talking about bringing back the unicorns for this election. I know. You're all wondering how they can even talk about the unicorns if they all died in the fire. Well, apparently they were able to recover some unicorn DNA from the body and are doing some cloning.
The problem is that the recovered DNA was badly damaged in the fire. In an attempt to correct the damaged DNA they have spliced in DNA from two sources. I suppose somewhat like was done in Jurassic Park.
One thing that I believe is a mistake on their part is that I've heard that they are using scientists who are unemployed global warming advocates instead of scientists that specialize in DNA.
No photos were allowed to be taken of the original unicorns, and naturally they are not allowing any photos to be taken of this new cloned breed. I, however, have been able to obtain a hastily drawn rendition of both from a fictional spirit-guide friend who is on assignment on site.
The first is one of the original unicorns. The second is the clone. With the clone it appears that at least one, and possibly both, of the sources used for the spliced DNA were Jackasses.
Original unicorn
Cloned unicon?
