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Author Topic: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words  (Read 1608 times)

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Offline GOBUCKS

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Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« on: April 06, 2010, 12:34:50 AM »
Just when you thought it was safe to return to the DUmp, the CalPig deposits another pile of words. So if you go over, watch where you step:
Quote
CaliforniaPeggy  (1000+ posts)        Mon Apr-05-10 11:22 PM
Original message
A little poem for tonight: Anticipation 
skin softening
pulse quickens
pupils darken

knowing what will
be

unafraid
to join

what life
is
when we are
in
full flood

© 2010 MLC

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A review from TLB:
Quote
Don't get me wrong - her poetry isn't bad.  It's awful.  It's the kind of thing that would blind God if He had to read it.  It's a collection of words that should be machine-gunned down, one by one, preferably out in the desert, with no witnesses, and a nice young girl who could be counted on to claim that she'd been shooting jackrabbits.  It's so bad, mirrors crack if anyone looking into a mirror while thinking of one of CP's poems runs the risk of permanent scarring, even blindness, while thinking of it as he peers into the mirror.

Her poetry needs immolation.  She needs to have all writing impletments and keyboards, paper, blank walls, toilet paper, paper towels, margins in newspapers, and even the blank part of framed works of art removed from her home until this idea that she's writing "poetry" passes.  Maybe medication will help.


A review from DUmmy NanceGreggs, who thinks Beth Ferrari is smart, and "Gigli" was a great movie:
Quote
NanceGreggs  (1000+ posts)        Tue Apr-06-10 01:20 AM
Response to Original message
15. Hmmmm ...
Sometimes your paring knife cuts too close to the bone - exposing that part of us we choose to keep hidden from view.

You are, as always, precise in your incisions - executed with the style and grace of one unafraid of having but one of their many aspects exposed for all to see.

You venture out undaunted - and that is part of your magic.

I think she uses her paring knife to butcher the English language.
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Offline Mike220

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #1 on: April 06, 2010, 01:17:07 AM »
After reading something that bad, now I'm afraid to go to sleep. I fear that my brain will shut down from the stupidity that just flowed from my screen if I do.
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Offline kenth

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #2 on: April 06, 2010, 04:57:35 AM »
Yep. CPeg is a literary knife wielding maniac, sending words into fits of terror at the thought of being her next victim.
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Offline littlelamb

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #3 on: April 06, 2010, 05:38:20 AM »
Can anyone say  :loser:
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Offline Chris_

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #4 on: April 06, 2010, 06:31:32 AM »
Priceless stuff!

Everytime I read one her "poems" I start hearing Beatnik music and thinking of some smokey club populated by a bunch of dirty hippies.  :-)
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Offline Karin

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #5 on: April 06, 2010, 07:19:20 AM »
Quote
skin softening
pulse quickens
pupils darken

Skin softening is not an involuntary physical reaction, so this makes no sense. 

Quote
when we are
in
full flood

CPig, you are constantly referencing drowning, flooding, and the like in your little messes.  Would you kindly finish going down for the third time? 

Even more execreble was the commentary by NanceGreggs.  Most of the time, I think the audience is pulling her leg to have a laugh, but I'm not so sure about Nance. 

What was gross from the other day, was some DUmmie told Cpig her erotica poetry had "put her in the mood." 
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Offline The Village Idiot

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #6 on: April 06, 2010, 07:34:05 AM »
I don't get it, is this about sex or menstruation or something?
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Offline Lord Undies

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #7 on: April 06, 2010, 07:39:05 AM »
And then the sun spit morning,
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Offline delilahmused

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #8 on: April 06, 2010, 10:29:48 AM »
Quote
what life
is
when we are
in
full flood

So is she into golden showers or something? (squirt, squirt, squirt, squirt)

Cindie
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Offline Red October

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #9 on: April 06, 2010, 10:36:19 AM »
My dog's

butthole's a-winkin'.


Let her

outside

to drop her payload.


Hey, I'm a poet!   :cheersmate:
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Offline DumbAss Tanker

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #10 on: April 06, 2010, 11:57:51 AM »
In the eternal words of Joseph Conrad, "The horror, the horror."

Words fail me.  If only they had failed her instead.

Quote
...
unafraid
to join

what life
is
when we are
in
full flood

I think flood season was over a long time ago for you, Peg.


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Offline bijou

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #11 on: April 06, 2010, 12:05:46 PM »
Quote from: DumbAss Tanker on April 06, 2010, 11:57:51 AM
In the eternal words of Joseph Conrad, "The horror, the horror."

Words fail me.  If only they had failed her instead.

I think flood season was over a long time ago for you, Peg.



They did fail her, they ran screaming from inclusion in another ode. Tragically however she was able to catch up with a few before they made their escape.
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Offline lastparker

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #12 on: April 06, 2010, 12:07:49 PM »
Quote from: FGL on April 06, 2010, 07:34:05 AM
I don't get it, is this about sex or menstruation or something?

I'm not sure, but if it is the latter, cramps are usually all that I need to figure it out.
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Offline dutch508

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #13 on: April 06, 2010, 12:12:15 PM »
Quote from: lastparker on April 06, 2010, 12:07:49 PM
I'm not sure, but if it is the latter, cramps are usually all that I need to figure it out.

Holy shit. CP is about old enough to be one of the original back-up singers for the Adam and Eve road show. You can't tell me her/his/it's sewer tubing isn't all dry and dusty by now.

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Offline Wineslob

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #14 on: April 06, 2010, 12:13:36 PM »
Quote
Would you kindly finish going down for the third time?  


She needs to make a few more circles around the bowl.
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Offline The Village Idiot

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #15 on: April 06, 2010, 12:15:31 PM »
Quote from: dutch508 on April 06, 2010, 12:12:15 PM
You can't tell me her/his/it's sewer tubing isn't all dry and dusty by now.

 :rotf: :rotf:
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Offline AllosaursRus

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Re: Not For The Squeamish - A Squishy Squirming Little Wad Of CalPig Words
« Reply #16 on: April 06, 2010, 12:24:45 PM »
Quote from: SarasotaRepub on April 06, 2010, 06:31:32 AM
Priceless stuff!

Everytime I read one her "poems" I start hearing Beatnik music and thinking of some smokey club populated by a bunch of dirty hippies.  :-)

Yep, what was his name, Maynard G. Krebs? She sounds just like some of the crap he threw out in jest. Problem is, she's series!
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