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Author Topic: Somali Cruises  (Read 1907 times)

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Offline Chris

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Somali Cruises
« on: June 26, 2009, 06:30:17 PM »
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Safari" is the Swahili word for adventure and that's just what we have in store for you.

We guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by pirates or we will refund half your money back, including gun rental charges and any unused ammo (mini gun charges not included). How can we guarantee you will experience a hijacking? We operate at 5 knots within 12 miles of the coast of Somalia. If an attempted hijacking does not occur, we will turn the boat around and cruise by at 4 knots. We will repeat this for up to 8 days making three passes a day along the entire length of Somalia. At night the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot off at intervals and loud disco music beamed shore side to attract attention.

Cabin space is limited so respond quickly. Reserve your package before June 29 and get 100 rounds of free tracer ammo in the caliber of your choice.

http://www.somalicruises.com/

The rental rates seem reasonable.  And they have snacks!
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Offline The Village Idiot

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Re: Somali Cruises
« Reply #1 on: June 26, 2009, 06:42:57 PM »
lol

pirate hunting as tourism?
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Offline The Village Idiot

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Re: Somali Cruises
« Reply #2 on: June 26, 2009, 06:45:25 PM »
Quote from: Chris on June 26, 2009, 06:30:17 PM
The rental rates seem reasonable.  And they have snacks!

This could be a big advertiser for the Bunny News Network
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Offline Chris

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Re: Somali Cruises
« Reply #3 on: June 26, 2009, 06:45:52 PM »
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Luxury yachts in Russia are offering pirate hunting cruises in the dangerous waters off the coast of Somalia with the hope of being attacked.

Passengers pay about $5,000 to patrol and can pay an extra $7.50 a day to receive an AK-47 machine gun for protection and about $10 for 100 rounds of ammo.

The yachts travel from Djibouti to Mombasa in Kenya and deliberately cruise close to the coast at a speed of about five nautical miles hoping to attract pirates.

http://www.bartlesvillelive.com/content/weirdnews/story/Pirate-hunting-cruises-offered/lqymQFfLH0aF9FWGkopflw.cspx
http://www.asylum.com/2009/06/26/luxury-yacht-company-offers-pirate-hunting-cruises/
Hmmm... I wonder why that site doesn't have any contact information on it.  Or I wasn't able to find any.
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Offline thundley4

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Re: Somali Cruises
« Reply #4 on: June 26, 2009, 07:23:33 PM »
Quote from: Chris on June 26, 2009, 06:30:17 PM
The rental rates seem reasonable.  And they have snacks!

How can you go wrong with these testimonials?
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Testimonials
"I got three confirmed kills on my last trip. I'll never hunt big game in Africa again. I felt like the Komandant in Schindlers list!" -- Lars , Hamburg Germany

"Six attacks in 4 days was more than I expected. I bagged three pirates and my 12yr old son sank two rowboats with the minigun. PIRATES: 0 - PASSENGERS: 32! Well worth the trip. Just make sure your spotter speaks English" -- Donald, Salt Lake city Utah USA

"I haven't had this much fun since flying choppers in NAM . Don't worry about getting shot by pirates as they never even got close to the ship with those weapons they use and their shitty aim--reminds me of a drunken'juicer' door gunner we picked up from the motor pool back in Nam" -- 'chopper' Dan, Toledo USA.

"Like ducks in a barrel. They turned the ship around and we saw them cry in the water like little girls. Saw one wounded pirate eaten by sharks--what a laugh riot! This is a must do." -- Zeke, Springs Kentucky USA
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Offline djones520

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Re: Somali Cruises
« Reply #5 on: June 26, 2009, 09:31:27 PM »
A friend of mine and I actually had this idea.   :cheersmate:

Would be fun to try.
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Offline The Village Idiot

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Re: Somali Cruises
« Reply #6 on: June 26, 2009, 10:23:36 PM »
Thats weird. when I linked it to my facebook, nearly 200 images were found...?? They just kept coming.. something weird with it
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Offline Chris_

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Re: Somali Cruises
« Reply #7 on: July 04, 2009, 07:19:23 AM »
That would be so cool, but, taxidermy would probably be out of the question :(
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Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: Somali Cruises
« Reply #8 on: July 04, 2009, 09:24:05 AM »
Quote from: Big Don on July 04, 2009, 07:19:23 AM
That would be so cool, but, taxidermy would probably be out of the question :(

I'd rather go for the shoot and release program.
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Offline Chris_

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Re: Somali Cruises
« Reply #9 on: July 04, 2009, 02:09:45 PM »
Quote from: JohnnyReb on July 04, 2009, 09:24:05 AM
I'd rather go for the shoot and release program.
Have the trophy's leg hacked off, add a wooden peg, an eye patch and a stylish tricorner hat... wouldn't that look awesome in the corner of your living room?
imagine the fun of staggering in the door half drunk, to be confronted by a stuffed Somali pirate...
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Offline JohnnyReb

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Re: Somali Cruises
« Reply #10 on: July 04, 2009, 03:47:30 PM »
Quote from: Big Don on July 04, 2009, 02:09:45 PM
Have the trophy's leg hacked off, add a wooden peg, an eye patch and a stylish tricorner hat... wouldn't that look awesome in the corner of your living room?
imagine the fun of staggering in the door half drunk, to be confronted by a stuffed Somali pirate...


Well....maybe.....if they can do something about the smell.
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"America is like a healthy body and its resistance is threefold: its patriotism, its morality, and its spiritual life. If we can undermine these three areas, America will collapse from within."  Stalin

Offline Chris_

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Re: Somali Cruises
« Reply #11 on: July 04, 2009, 08:35:25 PM »
Quote from: JohnnyReb on July 04, 2009, 03:47:30 PM
Well....maybe.....if they can do something about the smell.

Taxidermy doesn't smell, once they're done.
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