FREAKING HILARIOUS!!!!: How I became an Obama Supporter.

[asdf2231]

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3796574

BlueFireAnt (64 posts)      Thu Aug-14-08 12:10 PM
Original message
How I became an Obama Supporter.
 Advertisements [?]This happened a few months ago. I was already becoming apolitical as I was fed up with all the corruption from the republicans. Then this happened.

So, I'm taking a walk home from a costume party this past weekend. Me and my buddies went as the Village People. I was the cop. On my way back home I hear two men talking on the other side of the bushes. Being the nosey bastard I am, I kneel down behind the bushes to listen. Apparently, I have walked up on a pretty heated political debate. See, this guy in the neighborhood has the old GA state flag hanging on his porch. This is not uncommon in good old Turner County. A fellow from up north just happened to be riding by and noticed the flag. The homeowner was in the yard, so the passerby decided to stop and discuss a few things with the homeowner. At least that's what I gathered from the part of the conversation I heard.

This is where I picked up. The passerby was asking the homeowner if he had a problem with black people. The homeowner said no and wanted to know why he asked. Of course this is where the flag issue came up. The homeowner told the passerby that he had the flag up before GA changed the flag and since Gov. Roy Barnes didn't let the people vote on it, he still recognized it as his state flag. The passerby then asked if the homeowner supported Barrack Obama for president. The homeowner said, "You mean Hussein Obama?". The passerby said, "This is exactly what I'm talking about. You small town southerners fly your rebel flags and refuse to support Obama because of his skiin color. This is what is wrong with America today."

The homeowner said that his views on the flag and Obama have nothing to do with race and that the Hussein reference was just to get a rise from the passerby. he went on to explain that he doesn't support Obama because of his political differences. The passerby said all of the was bullshit and he can't expect any better from illiterate white trash.

I had heard enough. I jumped out of the bushes and asked the passerby just who in the hell did the think he was. He came into this man's yard and started an argument over a flag. He asked if it was normal for there to be cops in the bushes down here. I laughed and explained that I was not a cop. We all got a big laugh out of the look on his face when I jumped out. He took it in stride. He actually had a good sense of humor.

We all sat down on the homeowner's porch and had a cup of hot tea that the passerby made for us. He explained the hardships that blacks still have to this day because of what that flag represented. I had never took the time to actually research the facts of the Confederacy or the Civil War. I always just relied on the opinions of my father who is an admitted racist. It was like the world just became brighter that night. My eyes were opened or the first time. We were all in tears after hearing of the suffering of blakc people throughout history. I couldn't believe that my ancestors went in to Africa and stole those people from their native land. I has always been taught that other blacks sold the members of a conquered tribe as slaves. I should have known better. No black people would ever do that to their own people. They were all peaceful people until my evil ancestors taught them violence.

On the verge of an emotional breakdown, I sobbingly asked what could I do help the cause. The passerby told me that there is one thing I can do to at least start repairing the damage my people have done to blacks in the past. We have to look to the future while never forgetting to be guilty about the past. I told him I would pay any amount of money or donate any amount of time. He told me that it wouldn't be that hard.

So the homeowner and myself will be pulling that lever for black people everywhere come Nov 4th. Please vote for Obama.

And the rest is history.

 

[Texacon]

Uuuuhhhhmmmmm I think this was posted here first as a parody but I could be wrong.

KC

[USA4ME]

Uuuuhhhhmmmmm I think this was posted here first as a parody but I could be wrong.

KC

SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

.

[Texacon]

Uuuuhhhhmmmmm I think this was posted here first as a parody but I could be wrong.

KC

SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

.

Oops.  Sorry.   

KC

[Rebel Yell]

Since I never go to The Island of Misfit Toys anymore, I decided to take a suicide run.

BlueFireAnt (64 posts)      Thu Aug-14-08 12:10 PM
Original message
How I became an Obama Supporter.
 Advertisements [?]This happened a few months ago. I was already becoming apolitical as I was fed up with all the corruption from the republicans. Then this happened.

So, I'm taking a walk home from a costume party this past weekend. Me and my buddies went as the Village People. I was the cop. On my way back home I hear two men talking on the other side of the bushes. Being the nosey bastard I am, I kneel down behind the bushes to listen. Apparently, I have walked up on a pretty heated political debate. See, this guy in the neighborhood has the old GA state flag hanging on his porch. This is not uncommon in good old Turner County. A fellow from up north just happened to be riding by and noticed the flag. The homeowner was in the yard, so the passerby decided to stop and discuss a few things with the homeowner. At least that's what I gathered from the part of the conversation I heard.

This is where I picked up. The passerby was asking the homeowner if he had a problem with black people. The homeowner said no and wanted to know why he asked. Of course this is where the flag issue came up. The homeowner told the passerby that he had the flag up before GA changed the flag and since Gov. Roy Barnes didn't let the people vote on it, he still recognized it as his state flag. The passerby then asked if the homeowner supported Barrack Obama for president. The homeowner said, "You mean Hussein Obama?". The passerby said, "This is exactly what I'm talking about. You small town southerners fly your rebel flags and refuse to support Obama because of his skiin color. This is what is wrong with America today."

The homeowner said that his views on the flag and Obama have nothing to do with race and that the Hussein reference was just to get a rise from the passerby. he went on to explain that he doesn't support Obama because of his political differences. The passerby said all of the was bullshit and he can't expect any better from illiterate white trash.

I had heard enough. I jumped out of the bushes and asked the passerby just who in the hell did the think he was. He came into this man's yard and started an argument over a flag. He asked if it was normal for there to be cops in the bushes down here. I laughed and explained that I was not a cop. We all got a big laugh out of the look on his face when I jumped out. He took it in stride. He actually had a good sense of humor.

We all sat down on the homeowner's porch and had a cup of hot tea that the passerby made for us. He explained the hardships that blacks still have to this day because of what that flag represented. I had never took the time to actually research the facts of the Confederacy or the Civil War. I always just relied on the opinions of my father who is an admitted racist. It was like the world just became brighter that night. My eyes were opened or the first time. We were all in tears after hearing of the suffering of blakc people throughout history. I couldn't believe that my ancestors went in to Africa and stole those people from their native land. I has always been taught that other blacks sold the members of a conquered tribe as slaves. I should have known better. No black people would ever do that to their own people. They were all peaceful people until my evil ancestors taught them violence.

On the verge of an emotional breakdown, I sobbingly asked what could I do help the cause. The passerby told me that there is one thing I can do to at least start repairing the damage my people have done to blacks in the past. We have to look to the future while never forgetting to be guilty about the past. I told him I would pay any amount of money or donate any amount of time. He told me that it wouldn't be that hard.

So the homeowner and myself will be pulling that lever for black people everywhere come Nov 4th. Please vote for Obama.

And the rest is history.

Some are skeptical.......

gaspee  (1000+ posts)      Thu Aug-14-08 12:14 PM
Response to Original message
1. Hmmm
 Your satire isn't very sophisticated.

 
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LWolf  (1000+ posts)       Thu Aug-14-08 12:16 PM
Response to Original message
2. What an interesting story.
 It reads like fiction with a really improbable plot .



 
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Since when has that mattered

then there's the attaboy...

Love Bug  (1000+ posts)       Thu Aug-14-08 12:17 PM
Response to Original message
3. Well, you were a passerby, too,
 but good for you for diffusing what could have gotten ugly. It sounds like the three of you had a good discussion that was needed. Symbols do matter and people need to understand what things really mean and shouldn't just go by tradition or because "we've always done it that way." 
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http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x3796574

[asdf2231]

beat ya to it!

[JakeStyle]

Pull that lever for the black folk.....Pull it!

[Rebel]

ben_meyers  (1000+ posts)
Thu Aug-14-08 02:46 PM

9. Well, it has everything. Cops, jumping out of bushes, so
   
And a tear stained ending. I give it an 4.5 out of ten, hardly worth burning a mole.

[Rebel Yell]

beat ya to it!

You must have been sittin gthere waiting to pounce when I, uh, I mean he posted it.

[Rebel Yell]

RainDog  (1000+ posts)      Thu Aug-14-08 02:54 PM
Response to Original message
10. Are you a troll? 
 this is the stupidest post I've ever read from someone who claims to be a democrat.

as history shows, yes, various black tribes sold their enemies into slavery, just as various tribal leaders in Afghanistan gave false information about their rivals who ended up in Gitmo getting tortured for being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Anyone who is not a total dolt knows that human misery doesn't have a color and that events of the past were not simply "black or white."

However, I do agree with the passerby who noted that Georgia and other southern states are full of a crass bunch of racists assholes and this nation would be better off if they would just stay home and **** their sisters, like always.

but obviously that's not what's happening.

Hey, news flash. The south lost. You got off easy during Reconstruction. IMO, the south should have had its ass nailed to the wall. If so, we wouldn't have to deal with so many assholes today.


 
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Wow!!!!!!! Fortunately BlueFireAnt won't be roped into a shouting match.  Stick and move, stick and move.

[Rebel]

Yeah RainDog, you ****ing idiot, damn us for wanting to govern ourselves. 

...and don't start that slavery bullshit. You idiots up north can't claim the high road when 3 of your OWN ****ing states were slave-holding states. 

...but, seems you want us to leave now, right? Coooohl. I'm game. I don't want to be part of your sorry asses either.

[Rebel Yell]

Yeah RainDog, you ****ing idiot, damn us for wanting to govern ourselves. 

...and don't start that slavery bullshit. You idiots up north can't claim the high road when 3 of your OWN ****ing states were slave-holding states. 

...but, seems you want us to leave now, right? Coooohl. I'm game. I don't want to be part of your sorry asses either.

Correct me if I'm wrong, since I'm not a history expert, but weren't we trying to leave when Lincoln decided to burn my great state to the ground?

[Rebel]

Correct me if I'm wrong, since I'm not a history expert, but weren't we trying to leave when Lincoln decided to burn my great state to the ground?

We were trying to leave a couple of years before that. We wanted no part of the United States government. We didn't want Washington, nor anything else above the Mason-Dixon line.

Also, Georgia wasn't the only place f'ed up by Sherman. It started in my home state:

http://www.jackpedia.com/index.php/wiki/Chimneyville/

[Rebel Yell]

Correct me if I'm wrong, since I'm not a history expert, but weren't we trying to leave when Lincoln decided to burn my great state to the ground?

We were trying to leave a couple of years before that. We wanted no part of the United States government. We didn't want Washington, nor anything else above the Mason-Dixon line.

Also, Georgia wasn't the only place f'ed up by Sherman. It started in my home state:

http://www.jackpedia.com/index.php/wiki/Chimneyville/

Still don't, in a perfect world.

[Rebel]

Just found something out while reading. You know, going from a word or phrase and using google and all. Kinda like a 6 degrees of separation thing.

The phrase at Jackpedia:

One of the Confederate Generals defending Jackson was former United States Vice President John C. Breckenridge.

Ok, Breckinridge, VP to James Buchanan.

James Buchanan:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Buchanan

Apparently never married, but "may" have had a relationship with a long-time live-in "friend" of the male type. From a letter by him:

"I am now 'solitary and alone,' having no companion in the house with me. I have gone a wooing to several gentlemen, but have not succeeded with any one of them. I feel that it is not good for man to be alone; and should not be astonished to find myself married to some old maid who can nurse me when I am sick, provide good dinners for me when I am well, and not expect from me any very ardent or romantic affection."

The letter was written after his male "friend" left for France. The male friend:

William Rufus King.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_R._King

King County, Washington (Seattle) was named after him.

King's tomb is located at the Live Oak Cemetery in Selma, Alabama and is accompanied by a historical marker.

In honor of his inauguration as Vice President, the newly formed Washington Territory named King County for him, as well as Pierce County after President Pierce, in hopes of gaining speedy admission to the Union by currying favor with the new administration. Though Washington did not become a state until 1889, Pierce and King counties still exist.

However, when you go to King County's page on Wiki:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_County,_Washington

It looks completely different.

On February 24, 1986, the King County Council passed Council Motion 6461, "setting forth the historical basis for the 'renaming' of King County in honor of Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.". Because only the state can charter counties, this change was not made official until April 19, 2005, when Washington Governor Christine Gregoire signed Senate Bill 5332 into law. Due primarily to the advocacy of councilmember Larry Gossett, the County Council voted on February 27, 2006 to change the county's logo from a royal crown to an image of King's face.[5] On March 12, 2007, the new logo was unveiled.

Can you say, "liberals, ya just pwned yourselves, idiots. 

[Vagabond]

Yeah RainDog, you ******* idiot, damn us for wanting to govern ourselves. 

...and don't start that slavery bullshit. You idiots up north can't claim the high road when 3 of your OWN ******* states were slave-holding states. 

...but, seems you want us to leave now, right? Coooohl. I'm game. I don't want to be part of your sorry asses either.

Yankees won't leave. They like to have something to bitch about too much.  If they are forced to stand on their own, they wouldn't be able to bitch about us.

[Chris_]

Yeah RainDog, you ****ing idiot, damn us for wanting to govern ourselves.  :whatever:

...and don't start that slavery bullshit. You idiots up north can't claim the high road when 3 of your OWN ****ing states were slave-holding states.  ::)

...but, seems you want us to leave now, right? Coooohl. I'm game. I don't want to be part of your sorry asses either.

Correct me if I'm wrong, since I'm not a history expert, but weren't we trying to leave when Lincoln decided to burn my great state to the ground?

Yeah, things would be so much better with an emaciated jr. america watering down the USA/

[Chris_]

Yeah RainDog, you ******* idiot, damn us for wanting to govern ourselves.  :whatever:

...and don't start that slavery bullshit. You idiots up north can't claim the high road when 3 of your OWN ******* states were slave-holding states.  ::)

...but, seems you want us to leave now, right? Coooohl. I'm game. I don't want to be part of your sorry asses either.

Yankees won't leave. They like to have something to bitch about too much.  If they are forced to stand on their own, they wouldn't be able to bitch about us.

That explains who won the Civil War.  Northern Inability.