[quotejunior college (299 posts)
I signed up for Ashley Madison
After 21 years of marriage, I discovered my wife was cheating on me. I was devastated. It turns out she was menopausal and not taking any estrogen replacement. She was mean to me when I confronted her with it and didn't show any emotion. I came to her in tears and she was non-responsive. I was scared and I was worried she was going to walk out on me and leave me alone in the world without my two young boys. I was wrong about that but I was an emotional wreck and nothing seemed out of the realm of possibility. In desperation, I decided to try Match.com so I could at least meet a friend so if my wife were to leave me I would at least have someone that I could meet and possibly turn to so I wouldn't be alone. My wife has been my life-long companion and I didn't think I could survive unless I had someone to be with. If you've ever been in a major break-up or relationship issue, you may know how I felt. The problem is that married guys probably don't meet too many people on Match.com, so I signed up for Ashley Madison instead, hoping to meet a friend. After four days I felt uncomfortable being on there and I paid $19.00 for a full delete. I regularly pay with credit cards online. Amazon, Alaska Air, the plumbing supply company that has the part I can't find anywhere else, etc. I didn't think giving them my credit card info was any different and I didn't provide any information about myself in my profile including the email I used which I created specifically for the site and have since forgotten. The only way to tie me to the site is from the credit card info I gave them.
My wife is not seeing him anymore and we are getting along well now and she is on estrogen replacement and everything was going great until last weeks data dump. Now I fear I will be labeled for life as an adulterer. Will parents still bring their children over for play dates? Will I be allowed to chaperone kids on field trips, etc? I can only imagine the lifelong problems I will face because I am labeled as the neighborhood adulterer. My wife feels horrible about this and she blames herself for me signing up for the site. I don't blame her because it was me who signed up, not her. I have many texts she wrote the person she was seeing and a record of when I deleted my AM account. I have yet to find a data dump search site that will show my name, address and profile information but in a way, I want one to go online and stay there because if you look at my user profile, you will see that the only thing it says is that I was looking for a friend and that I was a member for a total of four days and that I didn't communicate with a single user on that site.
I felt compelled to share my story after reading a few threads on DU that turned into Ashley user bash festivals with people saying that Ashley users are all rotten dirtbags that deserve everything they get and more. I felt horrible all day and still do after reading those threads. I'm not looking for sympathy. I just want people to know that not everyone that signed up for that site is a rotten person that deserves to be castigated and shamed for life.[/quote]
No wonder this knucklehead stayed with her, he couldn't even work up the nerve to cheat on a cheating @#$%! of a wife. Not only that, he made excuses for her. I have no sympathy for him, he's made his bed, now he has to sleep in it.