The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: JakeStyle on July 14, 2014, 09:24:19 PM
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http://www.discussionist.com/10222984
It's a pretty boring thread about how restaurant wait staff are getting stiffed due to all the a-hole customers who really only want a place to park their ass and gobble up free wifi, rather than just eating and GTFO. It's a snoozfest until certifiable idiot Frostlight (don't know his DU name, but I'm sure he has one) chimes in with an good old fashioned bouncy tale.
Response to R2D42 (Original post)
Frostlight (565 posts) Mon Jul 14, 2014, 02:29 AM
3. I was in a local fast food joint just a few nights ago.
There were two guys making the food and two young women running around taking orders from the drive through AND the counter while trying to put orders together and get everyone served. The place was packed and I could see there were cars in the drive through because they were lined up all around the building.
This one asshole who ordered his food right before I did was handed his take out bag and by my watch he waited just under 7 minutes.
"Some 'fast food'", he said as he started walking out.
The girl behind the counter stopped and looked at him in disbelief for a moment before going right into her next task.
"That was pretty fast, I agree with you, Sir.", I said. (I'm paraphrasing from this point)
He stopped with his hand on the door. "Do you know how long I waited? That was ridiculous!"
"You waited 7 minutes for fresh food because 4 people are handling dozens of customers besides yourself. But because you're a 'conservative', it's all about you. Also, as a 'conservative', you can't actually assess the complex dynamic that the people serving you are dealing with, because it's all about how YOU feel and not about recognizing what these people are going through to get you your food despite ALL the other people putting demands on them."
"What?!? I .... *muttering nonsense*"
"Yeah, isn't it funny how I know you watch Fox 'News'? Your profile fits the kind of person that can only think about themselves and never put themselves in the position of people who have to suffer assholes like you."
"You're just some crazy person!"
"Yeah, but I'm right about you being a conservative... aren't I."
"You liberals! Blah blah blah", as he walks out the door.
It was one of the more rewarding moments of my life. The look the one young lady gave me, the smile, that was worth it. I don't go there often, but they always treat me well
Instead of the attaboys that he'd have gotten at the DUmp, he gets laughed at, and he has yet to return to the thread.
Response to Frostlight (Reply #3)
USNRET1988 (565 posts) Mon Jul 14, 2014, 03:43 AM
4. A really good bouncy includes a cop jumping out of the bushes, OR an instant conversion of the
antagonist, OR a round of applause by the onlookers OR a combination.
I do give you points for the the admission that it was paraphrased recounting of the "tale", most bouncy spinners aren't honest and appear to have eidetic memories.
Response to Frostlight (Reply #3)
Butchie_T (300 posts) Mon Jul 14, 2014, 04:27 AM
5. Very cool story, thanks!
:sarcasm:
Response to Frostlight (Reply #3)
Mon Jul 14, 2014, 08:07 AM
Bohannan (100 posts)
7. Hillarious
"You waited 7 minutes for fresh food because 4 people are handling dozens of customers besides yourself. But because you're a 'conservative', it's all about you. Also, as a 'conservative', you can't actually assess the complex dynamic that the people serving you are dealing with, because it's all about how YOU feel and not about recognizing what these people are going through to get you your food despite ALL the other people putting demands on them."
(http://uproxx.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/alwaysunny-coolstory.gif)
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A clever parody of bouncies is wasted on the numbskulls at DULite.
Anyway, nice job, Frostlight.
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"Yeah, isn't it funny how I know you watch Fox 'News'? Your profile fits the kind of person that can only think about themselves and never put themselves in the position of people who have to suffer assholes like you."
"You're just some crazy person!"
"Yeah, but I'm right about you being a conservative... aren't I."
"You liberals! Blah blah blah", as he walks out the door.
Jesus H. keeeryst......Fox News...really? How infantile can you get?
It was one of the more rewarding moments of my life. :rotf: :rotf: The look the one young lady gave me, the smile, that was worth it. I don't go there often, but they always treat me well
::) ::) ::) ::) ::)
:bouncy: :diebouncy: I take back the previous question.
EDIT:
Oh, a Discussionist bouncy. Yeah, you'll get actually slammed over there because we are there.
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Frostlight... excellent.
Approaching the in-your-face level that Ban used to do. Brilliant!
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Frostlight... excellent.
Approaching the in-your-face level that Ban used to do. Brilliant!
Hmmm . . . :confused:
:tongue:
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That was embarrassing. :rotf:
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Frostlight (565 posts) Mon Jul 14, 2014, 02:29 AM
3. It was one of the more rewarding moments of my life.
WOW, If being a smatass in a fast food joint is one of the rewarding moments in your life, you are leading a pretty worthless existance.
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I cannot believe that even here DUmmy Frostlight's parody is sailing right over people's heads.
But if you have to explain a joke it's ruined.
Sad.
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I cannot believe that even here DUmmy Frostlight's parody is sailing right over people's heads.
But if you have to explain a joke it's ruined.
Sad.
In all fairness, the regular primitive lives a life in the absurd on a daily basis so it's often hard to destinguish between that and fiction.
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7 minutes....hell, DUmmie could have put that time to good use.....and smoked a joint.
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If it was a parody, it wasn't particularly well done. Dreamer Tatum, now HE can make a good parody. Even got nominated.
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If it was a parody, it wasn't particularly well done. Dreamer Tatum, now HE can make a good parody. Even got nominated.
Dreamer Tatum is good, but Frostlight doesn't have enough history to judge.
Judging from this effort he could be a contender.
He could even be Dreamer Tatum.