The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: franksolich on July 13, 2014, 05:04:29 PM
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http://www.democraticunderground.com/115743676
Oh my.
LaydeeBug (5,929 posts) Sun Jul 13, 2014, 12:44 AM
So, does anybody have any tips on starting a charcoal grill/smoker?
I bought a wee one for my tiny side porch, and wanted to try my hand at it. My first few times, I dried out some chicken breasts. (I put them on too early)
Now, that is so wrong.
Dried-out chicken breasts are great.....and safe to eat too.
Because they're dried out, it means they're done, and no grease in them.
Major Nikon (14,879 posts) Sun Jul 13, 2014, 01:11 AM
1. There's plenty of stuff on the youtubes
But the basic process is pretty simple. You pile up the charcoal like a pyramid, set it on fire, and let it burn until coals are formed (about 15 minutes or so). Once you have a good set of coals going, spread them out over one side of the grill, leaving the other side bare. This gives you a direct heating side and an indirect heating side. Brown your vittles on the direct heating side (about 3 minutes each side) and then move them over to the indirect heating side to finish until the internal temperature hits your desired doneness level.
JayhawkSD (1,238 posts) Sun Jul 13, 2014, 01:27 AM
2. Use the chimney starter.
Using a starter fluid can leave a residue of gasoline smell. A "chimney" starter is better, expecially for a small grill. It looks like a large tin can with the top and bottom cut out, and you can get one at Lowes or Home Depot. Or you can make your own from one of those large commercial tin cans.
You set it on the charcoal grate of your grill and put tightly wadded newspaper in the bottom and pile the charcoal on top. Light the newspaper from the bottom and let it burn. Thet will start the charcoal. Leave it in the chimney until it is mostly gray and than simply lift the chimney away from it, using an oven mitt, and letting the charcoal fall out.
Spread it as Major Nikon suggests.
The charcoal gets going faster in the chimney than it does in a loose pile, and it eliminates the use of flammable liquids.
trof (45,279 posts) Sun Jul 13, 2014, 09:04 AM
3. Try old fashioned 'lump' charcoal.
I don't like the 'binding' chemicals in briquets and the lump lights easier.
I think you can find "Cowboy Charcoal" at Lowes.
Major Nikon (14,879 posts) Sun Jul 13, 2014, 10:44 AM
6. Possibly the reason why they were dry was because they were overcooked
It's very easy to overcook things on the grill. I suggest getting an instant read thermometer and cooking chicken breasts to 165º F.
Another trick is to brine or marinade inject your chicken breasts before cooking, or you can just do a salt rub about 4-8 hours before you cook them.
^^^the primitive has no concern, no concern at all, for food safety.
Warpy (77,401 posts) Sun Jul 13, 2014, 11:06 AM
7. The easiest way is with a charcoal chimney
Stuff the bottom with newspaper, fill the top with charcoal, set into the grill and light the paper. Coals are good when they're showing white ash over most of the surface. Put on an oven mitt and pour the coals out of the chimney into the grill.
I did my best grilling on a little hibachi. No, it wouldn't feed a crowd, but it fit on a fire escape or metal table on a balcony. My favorite thing to grill was fresh sea scallops brushed with a little garlicky Italian dressing and skewered with onions and mushrooms. Extra points if I'd bought them off the boat and shucked them myself.
The points above about cowboy charcoal and investing in a meat thermometer are good ones, especially the latter. Finding bloody and/or translucent chicken next to a bone is the worst.
Nac Mac Feegle (63 posts) Sun Jul 13, 2014, 03:46 PM
8. Pro tip: Testing the done-ness of piece of meat.
Hold your left hand with the palm facing you.
Touch each of the tips of your fingers to the tip of your thumb in turn.
Feel the pad at the base of the thumb as you touch each finger in turn. Notice the difference in firmness between each finger.
The firmness of the pad for each different finger is the same firmness for each stage of done-ness for a piece of meat. From the index finger to the little finger; rare, medium rare, medium, medium well.
Poke the meat with your finger, and compare to the appropriate finger of done-ness. Do not poke holes in your meat, that will let the juices out.
Always let a piece of meat rest after cooking to let the heat and juices distribute through the whole piece.
"Letting the juices out" is what one wants, unless one has a perverse desire to clog the arteries, or to commit suicide by dining on raw germ-infested bacteria-infested food.
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On the matter of lighting charcoal, I've done it, but so rarely, usually by laying down newspapers and small pieces of really dry wood, and dumping charcoal on top of it, and then lighting the paper.
In my younger days, a few times I poured on Everclear 180 proof grain alcohol; that worked too.
There's two "charcoal" grills here, both of them very large. One's permanently in the front yard, the other's in the back yard and is sometimes moved down by the river for the use of people camping there.
But nearly all the time, we just use plain old wood. Contrary to popular misconception, Nebraska has trees, tons and tons of trees, and they inevitably come crashing down from the winds. People other than myself know what's the best wood, and that's cut up for this purpose.
It works.
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"Letting the juices out" is what one wants, unless one has a perverse desire to clog the arteries, or to commit suicide by dining on raw germ-infested bacteria-infested food.
Coach'll have a cool-center rare slab of well-marbled steak with a half-dozen pieces of sashimi.
Just typing that made me hungry.
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At this point in time, DUmmyland really needs a true expert on charcoal grilling with a Hibachi. Technology being what it is these days.
But where is such an expert to be found?
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Nac Mac Feegle
Poke the meat with your finger
Great advice, DUmmy.
No, wait, that's terrible advice. That piece of meat is hot. The coals under the meat are hotter.
On second thought, a Dummy should check the temperature of meat on the grill with its nose. Press your nose against that steak, DUmmy. The nose knows!
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DUmmies--use about a quart of gasoline as a lighter fluid. :fuelfire: :whistling:
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Nac Mac Feegle (63 posts)
Sun Jul 13, 2014, 03:46 PM
Poke the meat with your finger.
At the DUmp, that's foreplay.