The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: BattleHymn on April 18, 2014, 12:06:44 PM
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http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018606945
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 11:58 AM
Star Member a kennedy (8,220 posts)
I'm terribly embarrassed, but I need grammar help on this little poem please.......
It's for my husband's anniversary card....can someone please correct anything wrong in the grammar department....and thank you.
As in the essence of the Opal......
The ups and downs,
The positives and negatives,
The happy’s the sad’s,
The laughs the cries....
All facets of our 34 years.....
Together, I’ll love you forever.
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 12:01 PM
Star Member arcane1 (22,604 posts)
1. I'd lose the apostrophes in "happy's" and "sad's", but otherwise I like it :)
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 12:05 PM
Star Member CaliforniaPeggy (108,511 posts)
3. Happy Anniversary!
I think he'll love it!
And I agree about the apostrophes.
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 12:20 PM
Star Member onehandle (40,407 posts)
5. Poetry and emotion does not have to be subject to grammar.
This isn't a cover letter for a job application.
Rsmithnumbers has that department covered.
Fri Apr 18, 2014, 01:05 PM
Ino (1,456 posts)
7. Add commas after happys and laughs
and lose the apostrophes in happys and sads
Beautiful poem!
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It's so easy to see through the Dummy's real intent.
She didn't want help with her grammar, she wanted them to read her poem and go gaga over it.
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More cowbell.....or, at least a little aching seed.
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What does an Opal have to do with any of that? :???:
It sounds more like a roller coaster ride through a funhouse.
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It's so easy to see through the Dummy's real intent.
She didn't want help with her grammar, she wanted them to read her poem and go gaga over it.
B-i-n-g-o.
I'm disappointed to see Calpig showed up, but didn't offer a poem of her own.
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What does an Opal have to do with any of that? :???:
It sounds more like a roller coaster ride through a funhouse.
Guessed it is the "stone" equivalent for whatever year anniversary it is but not so from what I could find.
Just another DUmp lunatic.
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The opal makes zero sense. And "positive and negative" do not belong in poetry. Whew boy, is that a stinker.
Even losing the apostrophes in the happy's and sad's doesn't improve it, as those are not nouns*. What a moron this DUmmie is.
*Except in LOL cat memes, e.g. "I haz a sad." Not for someone married for 34 years.
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More cowbell.....or, at least a little aching seed.
Blink, blink, blink, blink . . .
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Fixed it
As in the essence of the Opal......
(more likely the fragrance of the Bong......)
The ups and downs,
(I mean uppers and downers)
The positives and negatives,
(The relatives and the sedatives)
The happy’s the sad’s,
(and other adjective plurizations)
The laughs the cries....
(The snivels the whines)
All facets of our 34 years.....
(All the face sags of three wasted decades)
Together, I’ll love you forever.
(Otherwise my life will be for naught....OH WAIT....)
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The word “Opal†has the “O†capitalized. When that is taken into consideration along with the propensity the DUmmies have for misspelling words there is a chance that the DUmmie is actually referring to an Opel automobile.
If so the poem could be paraphrased thusly…
Our marriage is like an old car: rusty and in constant need of repair.
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Opals don't have facets.
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Opals don't have facets.
I wondered about that. Don't think I've ever seen one with facets.
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That "poem" should be sufficient grounds for a divorce.
:loser: :loser: :loser:
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It's so easy to see through the Dummy's real intent.
She didn't want help with her grammar, she wanted them to read her poem and go gaga over it.
I think you're exactly right.
:cheersmate:
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Didn't see this before the crash. It's great!
DUmmy a kennedy could be competition for the CalPig as the DUmp's poet laureate.
In fact, she has an advantage.
I see the CalPig's tone-deaf vulgar rambling combined with a hilarious semi-literacy.
It's as if rsmithnumbers tried to emulate Robert Frost.
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I'm thinking this DUmmy has bigger problems than punctuation.
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Nobody has mentioned the excess periods in the ellipses.
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Nobody has mentioned the excess periods in the ellipses.
I figured they were an artistic choice, emphasizing the vagueness of the DUmmy's ideas. They seemed to fit with the facets of an opal being up and down.
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Fri Apr 18, 2014, 11:58 AM
Star Member a kennedy (8,220 posts)
I'm terribly embarrassed, but I need grammar help on this little poem please.......
It's for my husband's anniversary card....can someone please correct anything wrong in the grammar department....and thank you.
As in the essence of the Opal......
The ups and downs,
The positives and negatives,
The happy’s the sad’s,
The laughs the cries....
All facets of our 34 years.....
Together, I’ll love you forever.
Let me fix this abortion for you, dummie:
============================================================================
I am an idiot.
A real idiot.
I have no function in life.
Except to suck the welfare tit.
Taking money from people that earn it.
So I can make stupid poems.
That make no sense.
Except in my drug addled mind.
And think I am a genius.
I am a loser.
I post at DU with other losers.
I am laughed at by normal people.
I am a complete idiot.
34 years and this is all I have to show for my life.
My husband waits to die.
He waits for the...
Blink, Blink, Blink of flashing lights.
His last words to paramedic:
Goodbye cruel world. I married a dummie.
===============================================================================
That would be closer to the truth than what you wrote, dummie.
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Let me fix this abortion for you, dummie:
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I am an idiot.
A real idiot.
I have no function in life.
Except to suck the welfare tit.
Taking money from people that earn it.
So I can make stupid poems.
That make no sense.
Except in my drug addled mind.
And think I am a genius.
I am a loser.
I post at DU with other losers.
I am laughed at by normal people.
I am a complete idiot.
34 years and this is all I have to show for my life.
My husband waits to die.
He waits for the...
Blink, Blink, Blink of flashing lights.
His last words to paramedic:
Goodbye cruel world. I married a dummie.
===============================================================================
That would be closer to the truth than what you wrote, dummie.
:clap: :clap: :clap:
And the H5 to boot.