The Conservative Cave

The Bar => Comedy Central => Topic started by: mrclose on March 07, 2014, 04:13:35 PM

Title: DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas
Post by: mrclose on March 07, 2014, 04:13:35 PM
DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher says, "Okay, but don't go in that field over there," as he points out the location.

The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, "Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me." Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. "See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish . On any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand? "

A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull.

With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems likely that he'll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs .

"Your badge. Show him your BADGE!"
Title: Re: DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas
Post by: JohnnyReb on March 07, 2014, 04:43:52 PM
DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher says, "Okay, but don't go in that field over there," as he points out the location.

The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, "Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me." Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. "See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish . On any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand? "

A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull.

With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems likely that he'll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs .

"Your badge. Show him your BADGE!"
And yes there are some government employees that stupid and that full of themselves and their authority.
Title: Re: DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas
Post by: diesel driver on June 09, 2014, 08:48:47 PM
And yes there are some government employees that stupid and that full of themselves and their authority.

Only "some".   :lmao:
Title: Re: DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas
Post by: JohnnyReb on June 09, 2014, 09:11:46 PM
Only "some".   :lmao:
Well just 99% of the DOT officers.
Title: Re: DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas
Post by: mrclose on June 11, 2014, 06:35:41 PM
A guy went to the store the other day, he was only in there for about 5 minutes and when he came out there was a cop writing a parking ticket.

The guy goes up to the officer and says, 'Come on, how about giving a guy a break?'

The cop ignored him and continued writing the ticket.

So the guy called him a pencil-necked Nazi. The cop glared at him and started writing a second ticket for bald tires!!

Then the guy called him a horse's @$$

When the cop finished the second ticket he started writing a third!! The more the guy verbally abused him, the more tickets the cop wrote.

This went on for about 20 minutes until the guy stopped abusing the cop, went around the corner, got in his car and left.
Title: Re: DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas
Post by: obumazombie on June 12, 2014, 02:55:26 AM
A guy went to the store the other day, he was only in there for about 5 minutes and when he came out there was a cop writing a parking ticket.

The guy goes up to the officer and says, 'Come on, how about giving a guy a break?'

The cop ignored him and continued writing the ticket.

So the guy called him a pencil-necked Nazi. The cop glared at him and started writing a second ticket for bald tires!!

Then the guy called him a horse's @$$

When the cop finished the second ticket he started writing a third!! The more the guy verbally abused him, the more tickets the cop wrote.

This went on for about 20 minutes until the guy stopped abusing the cop, went around the corner, got in his car and left.

Was the guy a community organizer ?
Nah, he couldn't be.
He got into his own car.
Title: Re: DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas
Post by: Karin on June 18, 2014, 02:44:27 PM
A classic, and makes me laugh every time.