The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: Tess Anderson on January 15, 2014, 09:52:53 PM

Title: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Tess Anderson on January 15, 2014, 09:52:53 PM
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018555718
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018555710

Both threads for content:

Quote

Wed Jan 15, 2014, 02:07 PM

 Lady Freedom Returns (6,555 posts)


WOW! I got a lot done before noon today! All good too!



 First was an early morning meeting with my health team in the program I am in. Got to meet my new case manager. She will be the one to help keep me active and watch for signs of increasing depression. We will be seeing a lot of each other.
 
My physician says the latest x-rays show good results and he sees no reason to not clear me to start ultra sound treatments in Feb.
 
And I got to take a look at my apartment this morning too! I is a lovely studio with WiFi access. They have repainted all the walls with a nice, very light tan. And since I happen to mention that I was not a big fan of carpeting, they went with just keeping the lovely wood floor. They usually replace it every time someone moves out, but they decided not with what I said in our first meeting. I can not be more pleased!
 
The complex has a pool and a newly remodeled laundry. All the machines are new.

This place has a bus stop right in front and it is three blocks from a grocery store, two really. And in the opposite direction , just two block from my Doctor offices and pharmacy.
 
I am having a great day! I hope some of these good vibes I am having can get picked up by everyone on the Board! Everyone deserves to feel this good!

again with the quack medicine

Quote

Response to Aristus (Reply #3)

Wed Jan 15, 2014, 02:22 PM

 Lady Freedom Returns (6,555 posts)

4. Thank You!



tomorrow I get to go to the warehouse to see my furniture. To make sure I like it!

Sure you will ^.


Quote


Wed Jan 15, 2014, 02:19 PM

 Lady Freedom Returns (6,555 posts)


OH, forgot to mention this: My therapist wants to see about getting me a cat!


Last edited Wed Jan 15, 2014, 02:20 PM - Edit history (1)

 She thinks that a cat is a good thing for me. It will help to keep me calm at home. It would give me something to look after and keep occupies when I have down time. That way when I am there alone, I have something to help keep me from climbing the wall.
 
She also says that I can learn a lot from a cat.

She got the idea from the reports on how I reacted when the cat at the place I am staying hangs around me and how I get a little edgy when he is not.
 
I'm not sure how it will work out, but it would be nice to have a little friend. I have always been a dog person, but willing to give it a shot.

I bet she forgot to mention her alt. Girl is whacked.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Chris_ on January 15, 2014, 09:53:57 PM
That poor cat.  It should be illegal to recommend pets to crazy people.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: thundley4 on January 15, 2014, 10:04:20 PM
Quote
And since I happen to mention that I was not a big fan of carpeting, they went with just keeping the lovely wood floor. They usually replace it every time someone moves out, but they decided not with what I said in our first meeting.

No they only replace the carpet when the blood stains don't come out, or the carpet was infested with vermin.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: GOBUCKS on January 15, 2014, 10:18:05 PM
Most places where deadbeats are given free furnished apartments and free wi-fi and gorgeous flooring and new furniture encourage pets. They get free pets, free pet food, and free veterinarian services.

I don't know about you, but I'm about ready to pull up stakes and move to Tucson. Can you imagine how well they must treat people who work?
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Traveshamockery on January 15, 2014, 10:22:18 PM
So let me get this straight.  Any person who is homeless can just get into an apartment that's been repainted, a nice floor, has WiFi, and she's able to have a pet?  

Sum Ting Wong here.  Very, very wrong.  

Why are there so many homeless people if they can be treated so well?  Is Amber lying or has she gone completely cray-cray and this is a new mental institute she's being forced into, which she has convinced herself is an "apartment"?
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Chris_ on January 15, 2014, 10:25:54 PM
I wonder if she has a ten-year-old AZ drivers license and lied about being homeless to get some extra bennies after floating back into town in September.

I wouldn't put it past her.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Dori on January 15, 2014, 10:31:37 PM
I wonder if she has a ten-year-old AZ drivers license and lied about being homeless to get some extra bennies after floating back into town in September.

I wouldn't put it past her.

She never learned to drive.  That was on her bucket list for when she got to Arizona.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Chris_ on January 15, 2014, 10:36:12 PM
She never learned to drive.  That was on her bucket list for when she got to Arizona.
Oh good Lord.  She's even more useless than I imagined.  Who the hell doesn't know how to drive?
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Dori on January 15, 2014, 10:42:41 PM
Oh good Lord.  She's even more useless than I imagined.  Who the hell doesn't know how to drive?

She blamed her dad for never teaching her.  I wonder why Dave didn't teach her.  Oh wait, he probably never owned a car.

Maybe Knightrider will teach her how to ride a bike.  :rofl:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Dblhaul on January 15, 2014, 10:46:23 PM
I say she is still living under a bridge at a flood canal.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Chris_ on January 15, 2014, 10:47:20 PM
She blamed her dad for never teaching her.  I wonder why Dave didn't teach her.  Oh wait, he probably never owned a car.

Maybe Knightrider will teach her how to ride a bike.  :rofl:
Yeah, that'll happen.  She'll dump the clutch and wind up in a tree somewhere. :rofl:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: CollectivismMustDie on January 15, 2014, 10:51:39 PM
It is a DUmmie were referring to here, so I think this is a fair question:

Is it possible Lately Forgotten Rerun thinks that this professional can shrink her?

CMD
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: JLO on January 15, 2014, 10:52:44 PM
 Is Amber lying or has she gone completely cray-cray and this is a new mental institute she's being forced into, which she has convinced herself is an "apartment"?

Is it possible that the cat will be UGP and they are sharing space at the looney bin?
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: GOBUCKS on January 15, 2014, 10:56:08 PM
Oh good Lord.  She's even more useless than I imagined.  Who the hell doesn't know how to drive?
Not a problem. I'm pretty sure in Tucson they give you free driving lessons and then a free car.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: SarasotaRepub on January 15, 2014, 11:00:19 PM
Amber's kat...


(http://www.contractortalk.com/attachments/f11/50079d1307493315-lost-cat-free-cat.jpg)


Gotta keep state expenses down... :-)
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Skul on January 16, 2014, 01:59:57 AM
Quote
And since I happen to mention that I was not a big fan of carpeting, they went with just keeping the lovely PLYwood floor.
Translation-----easier to hose the vomit off floor.
My sympathy meter for her dropped to zero a couple weeks ago.
I hope Chief Running Drugs uses her as a transport method so he can beat her like a rented mule.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: hillneck on January 16, 2014, 06:46:21 AM
Quote
Wed Jan 15, 2014, 02:19 PM
Lady Freedom Returns (6,555 posts)
OH, forgot to mention this: My therapist wants to see about getting me a cat!


Motorcycle girl isn't going to like her petting another kitty.    :-)
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Big Dog on January 16, 2014, 06:49:51 AM
Amber takes the first step to her new life as Tucson's Crazy Cat Lady.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Big Dog on January 16, 2014, 06:54:29 AM

Motorcycle girl isn't going to like her petting another kitty.    :-)

The truth of the thing: The Tucson Tart told her shrink about her new GF, the Bike Dyke, and the shrink recommended that she "get a new *****".
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: BlueStateSaint on January 16, 2014, 07:24:25 AM
The truth of the thing: The Tucson Tart told her shrink about her new GF, the Bike Dyke, and the shrink recommended that she "get a new *****".

H5 for GMTA. :cheersmate:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Karin on January 16, 2014, 07:31:55 AM
Quote
tomorrow I get to go to the warehouse to see my furniture. To make sure I like it!

OK now look.  Her little tale just overreached with this one.  Just stop it Amber.  This is not happening.  There is no program anywhere in the world that provides for all of this.  The closest is Section 8, where you get a true shithole, the crappiest apartments in town with the most loathsome neighbors. 

This was bobolink's fantasy, to have a free, beautiful house with sumptuous furnishings just exactly to her liking.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: DefiantSix on January 16, 2014, 07:40:04 AM
OK now look.  Her little tale just overreached with this one.  Just stop it Amber.  This is not happening.  There is no program anywhere in the world that provides for all of this.  The closest is Section 8, where you get a true shithole, the crappiest apartments in town with the most loathsome neighbors. 

This was bobolink's fantasy, to have a free, beautiful house with sumptuous furnishings just exactly to her liking.

Precisely why I'm now firmly convinced that Amber Hoyt never left Joplin, MO.

 :popcorn:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: lastparker on January 16, 2014, 07:47:07 AM
That poor cat.  It should be illegal to recommend pets to crazy people.

Could not agree more.  :argh:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: 67 Rover on January 16, 2014, 07:49:26 AM
That poor cat.  It should be illegal to recommend pets to crazy people.

Duhhh, I will love him and pat him and hug him and squeeze him.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: vesta111 on January 16, 2014, 08:18:10 AM
Duhhh, I will love him and pat him and hug him and squeeze him.

 :thatsright: :thatsright:

Really now I do support stress dogs for our homeless vets, however a stress cat ???

Will Amber even think of cleaning the litter box every few days?   Will she remember to feed the cat, all is well for a stressed individual with a cat wandering about a nursing home, the patients don't have to feed or clean up after them.

I would no more advise Amber  to get a cat then I would suggest she become a foster Mom to children.

Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: DUmpsterDiver on January 16, 2014, 08:20:51 AM
OK now look.  Her little tale just overreached with this one.  Just stop it Amber.  This is not happening.  There is no program anywhere in the world that provides for all of this.  The closest is Section 8, where you get a true shithole, the crappiest apartments in town with the most loathsome neighbors. 

http://cms3.tucsonaz.gov/hcd/contact-section-8

Rental Assistance and Homeowner Assistance Program Application Status
Section 8                                         Is not currently accepting applications.
Public Housing                                   Now accepting applications for some. waiting lists.
Posadas Sentinel                               Now accepting applications.
Elderly Homeowner Repair Assistance     Is not currently accepting applications
Lead Hazard Control Program                Is not currently accepting applications
Deferred Loan Program                        Is not currently accepting applications
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Chris_ on January 16, 2014, 08:21:54 AM
Amber's kat...


(http://www.contractortalk.com/attachments/f11/50079d1307493315-lost-cat-free-cat.jpg)


Gotta keep state expenses down... :-)
ha ha ha ha... You bad.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: JohnnyReb on January 16, 2014, 08:33:54 AM
Decisions, decisions, which one to eat first...the dyke on the bike or the cat on the couch.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: tanstaafl on January 16, 2014, 08:44:53 AM
OK now look.  Her little tale just overreached with this one.  Just stop it Amber.  This is not happening.  There is no program anywhere in the world that provides for all of this.  The closest is Section 8, where you get a true shithole, the crappiest apartments in town with the most loathsome neighbors. 

This was bobolink's fantasy, to have a free, beautiful house with sumptuous furnishings just exactly to her liking.

I'm tending to lean your way there, Karin. And I don't believe there are any Section 8 owners (Section 8 is privately owned, Gov. subsidized housing) that would trust any of the renters with furnishing. It would be cheaper to burn a truckload of cash.
Besides, as the willingly homeless, I doubt that she'd qualify.
And food stamps? Didn't she quit her job in Joplin to go homeless in Tucson? Yeah, getting that. Not.
Free psychiatric care/group consoling? Only if the courts have sent her there as indigent and a danger to herself and members of the public.
I wonder when the free drivers' training and the inevitable free car turn up in Amber-Land.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: EagleKeeper on January 16, 2014, 09:06:33 AM
Yeah, I don't think a cat is the best idea.

As vesta mentioned, it is vitally important to keep the litter box clean and I've always thought that cat piss should be weaponized for crowd control and personal self defense.

The inevitable hair ball being horked up in the worst possible place (more on this in a bit).

Finding cat food that...

A) Your cat will be able keep down, it's a real bummer chasing a cat around in order to clean up vomit and they seem allergic to puking on vinyl, it must always be on fiber like carpets or furniture.

B) Dry food would be best if only they would learn to chew the kibble up, but of course they don't, it gets swallowed whole which, of course, upsets their tummies.

C) Moist cat food seems to more tolerable but it also acts as a solvent for cat teeth which means more veterinary intervention AND learning how cats display pain, which by itself is stressful. (hint: cats will purr even when they are in dire pain) purring is not a sign of pleasure, it's a vocalization that does not travel far and thereby attract other predators.

Front claws, you could have them removed but thats like cutting your fingers off at the outermost knuckle, so assuming they keep their claws cats shred things, all kinds of things.

You even have to consider how you mount toilet paper into the dispenser.

And lastly, don't get a siamese, nor a multi colored cat like a tabicat, they are simply too needy. Get a solid color cat, either black or white, they seem to be more aloof which is a good thing.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Chris_ on January 16, 2014, 09:10:56 AM
Good cat food isn't cheap.  I spend $30 on a bag that last about 60 days (compared to the $7/bag Meow Mix).
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: EagleKeeper on January 16, 2014, 09:15:17 AM
Good cat food isn't cheap.  I spend $30 on a bag that last about 60 days (compared to the $7/bag Meow Mix).

Good cat litter isn't exactly cheap either.

And cat toys...cats gotta shred something besides furniture.

Edit: And my forearm.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Chris_ on January 16, 2014, 09:16:31 AM
http://www.getcatsmeow.com/

I bought one of these and my cat loves it, but it burns through batteries pretty quickly.  They should have made one that plugs in to an outlet.

I hide it when it's not being used so he doesn't get used to it.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: EagleKeeper on January 16, 2014, 09:26:55 AM
http://www.getcatsmeow.com/

I bought one of these and my cat loves it, but it burns through batteries pretty quickly.  They should have made one that plugs in to an outlet.

I hide it when it's not being used so he doesn't get used to it.

Heh, I was at Krogers yesterday and they have a "as seen on tv" shelf. I actually held one in my hand and considered purchasing it.

But she already has a fling-ama-string, a whole box of toys and an armarkat cat tree (which almost reaches the ceiling)...it must stop somewhere.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Dori on January 16, 2014, 09:34:29 AM
I've had several cats over the years.  My worst luck was with the short haired Asian types with slender bodies.  My better pets had some angora in them.

Just my experience and observations.

Several breeds have a lot of difficulty digesting the dry food. Especially if they groom a lot and don't drink enough fresh water. Clean litter boxes are a must also, or they'll go where you don't want them to. 

I had a cat door, so that usually wasn't much of a problem for me.

 



 
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: tanstaafl on January 16, 2014, 10:04:19 AM
Why feed 'em? They'll go somewhere else if you don't put food out for them. Soon they'll wander onto the rifle range and get free shots at a moving target. And before you scream "cat killer!", most states consider a loose, uncollared kitty a non-indigenous predator, subject only to the possession of a current hunting license and not within city limits (Weapons discharge).

As far as a litter box - isn't there a park or better yet, a neighbor, nearby with a sandbox?

Besides, ask any cat around, it's a waste of time trying to train your human
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Skul on January 16, 2014, 10:27:45 AM
Good cat litter isn't exactly cheap either.

And cat toys...cats gotta shred something besides furniture.

Edit: And my forearm.
Remember EK, no carpet. Just a bare floor.
She don't need no stinking leeterbox.  :rotf:
Hose it off...good to go.  :-)
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Karin on January 16, 2014, 10:53:02 AM
Why does this thread have to go there. 
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: EagleKeeper on January 16, 2014, 10:59:36 AM
Why does this thread have to go there. 

Go where?
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: GOBUCKS on January 16, 2014, 11:01:14 AM
I don't think Amber needs to worry about her imaginary cat clawing up her imaginary furniture in her imaginary apartment.

Her imaginary program would just have her go back to the imaginary warehouse in her imaginary free car and pick out more imaginary free furniture.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Dori on January 16, 2014, 11:15:03 AM
I don't think Amber needs to worry about her imaginary cat clawing up her imaginary furniture in her imaginary apartment.

Her imaginary program would just have her go back to the imaginary warehouse in her imaginary free car and pick out more imaginary free furniture.

Now that is a scary thought if your right.  Just like having a multiple personality disorder like in Sybil.   :panic:

 

 

Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: GOBUCKS on January 16, 2014, 11:22:05 AM
Go where?

I think she's referring to the meeting of the Cat People.

It's kind of scary to most folks.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Karin on January 16, 2014, 12:08:37 PM
No, the meeting of the Cat Killers.   :mad:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Skul on January 16, 2014, 02:04:46 PM
No, the meeting of the Cat Killers.   :mad:




<<<<<< I kinda sympathize.  :-)
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Charles Henrickson on January 16, 2014, 02:52:02 PM
I'm now firmly convinced that Amber Hoyt never left Joplin, MO.

I, however, am convinced that Amber Hoyt is, or at least recently has been, living in Tucson. If you do a Nadin and use the google, and you search for "Amber Hoyt" "Tucson," you will find a number of results, outside of the DUmp, with local Tucson references, locations, contact info, etc.--e.g., a Tucson phone number to reach her at "the Sally," the Salvation Army homeless shelter there--which tells me that she was indeed living in Tucson as recently as this past fall. As far as the rest of her story--the date with Knightraven, the kitty, etc.--that I don't know.

- - - - - - - - - -

DATE A LEZZY
Tune: "Take It Easy" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AEzTdBJUHO8)

Well, I'm a Lady called Returns
Tryin' to lose my concerns
I've got sev'ral boyfriends on my mind
One that's now in prison
One that has gone missin'
None around that I can find

Date a lezzy
Date a lezzy
Don't let the fact that you're a girl
Make you dizzy

Lighten up, it's not the end
Don't even try to comprehend
Just find a chick to make your friend
And date a lezzy

Well, I'm standin' on a corner
In Tucson, Arizona
And such a fine sight to see
It's a lonely dyke
On a motorbike
Slowin' down, and then she says to me:

"Come on, Lady
Don't be fraidy
I gotta know if your sweet self
Is gonna date me

"I can say you won't be bored
You'll find new vistas to be explored
So hop on up and climb aboard
And date a lezzy!" . . .

Well, it's gettin' kinda late
And we're out on our date
Got a woman driver up in front
Sittin' right behind her
I need a reminder
She's just another . . . girl

Date a lezzy
Date a lezzy
Don't let the fact that you're a girl
Make you dizzy

Come on, Lady
Don't be fraidy
I gotta know if lezbo love
Will now persuade me . . .

Oh, I'm gettin' dizzy
I thought I'd date a lezzy
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: DefiantSix on January 16, 2014, 03:14:54 PM
I, however, am convinced that Amber Hoyt is, or at least recently has been, living in Tucson. If you do a Nadin and use the google, and you search for "Amber Hoyt" "Tucson," you will find a number of results, outside of the DUmp, with local Tucson references, locations, contact info, etc.--e.g., a Tucson phone number to reach her at "the Sally," the Salvation Army homeless shelter there--which tells me that she was indeed living in Tucson as recently as this past fall. As far as the rest of her story--knightraven, the cat, etc.--that I don't know.

The thing which puts her whole story into question for me though, is that every detail she's posted - such as you've outlined, for example - could just as easily be a detail she picked up over the first whirlwind tour she made of Tucson, both with Dreamboat Dave and after Evil Chad ruined her life. Having resided in one for a brief time of my young life, I know the location and phone number of the Sally weren't likely to change in the brief time that Amber was slaving off her bus fare home for her cruel sisters, as just one counterpoint.  Those things which may have changed over the few years she "was in  Joplin" would be stuff she could just as quickly get caught up to speed on by friends/contacts she'd made while she lived there.

I guess my point is that a lice-ridden bum living in and out of the homeless shelter doesn't have the luxury of a lot of the niceties that Amber posts about.  Library computer terminals are usually time-limited (spending much more than an hour is exceptionally rare), in order to keep the lice-ridden bums from parking in front of one all day long: as such, I would contend that there are many things Amber would need to use the machine for - assuming that any part of her story at all is true - in order to set up this freeloader's paradise she's describing, before she would ever have time to waste on reporting her latest mis-adventures to the retards at the DUmp. She sure as hell wouldn't have time to peruse everything that's being said about her posts HERE before she posted her hapless drivel on Skinner's Island of Misfit ****-ups, as it is becoming increasingly evident she's doing.

Given the unlikelihood of all of this, how is any less likely that she never left Joplin at all, or that, like so many other Useful Democrat Idiots before her, is just running a scam on the drooling morons of DemocratUnderground.com?
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Traveshamockery on January 16, 2014, 03:46:40 PM
I, however, am convinced that Amber Hoyt is, or at least recently has been, living in Tucson. If you do a Nadin and use the google, and you search for "Amber Hoyt" "Tucson," you will find a number of results, outside of the DUmp, with local Tucson references, locations, contact info, etc.--e.g., a Tucson phone number to reach her at "the Sally," the Salvation Army homeless shelter there--which tells me that she was indeed living in Tucson as recently as this past fall. As far as the rest of her story--the date with Knightraven, the kitty, etc.--that I don't know.

- - - - - - - - - -

DATE A LEZZY
Tune: "Take It Easy" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AEzTdBJUHO8)

Well, I'm a Lady called Returns
Tryin' to lose my concerns
I've got sev'ral boyfriends on my mind
One that's now in prison
One that has gone missin'
None around that I can find

Date a lezzy
Date a lezzy
Don't let the fact that you're a girl
Make you dizzy

Lighten up, it's not the end
Don't even try to comprehend
Just find a chick to make your friend
And date a lezzy

Well, I'm standin' on a corner
In Tucson, Arizona
And such a fine sight to see
It's a lonely dyke
On a motorbike
Slowin' down, and then she says to me:

"Come on, Lady
Don't be fraidy
I gotta know if your sweet self
Is gonna date me

"I can say you won't be bored
You'll find new vistas to be explored
So hop on up and climb aboard
And date a lezzy!" . . .

Well, it's gettin' kinda late
And we're out on our date
Got a woman driver up in front
Sittin' right behind her
I need a reminder
She's just another . . . girl

Date a lezzy
Date a lezzy
Don't let the fact that you're a girl
Make you dizzy

Come on, Lady
Don't be fraidy
I gotta know if lezbo love
Will now persuade me . . .

Oh, I'm gettin' dizzy
I thought I'd date a lezzy


Charles, you're on a roll.   :rofl:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: HawkHogan on January 16, 2014, 03:56:25 PM
How the hell does a homeless vagrant have a psychiatrist? 

When people wonder why our national debt is over 17 trillion dollars, these ridiculous programs come to mind. 

Why the hell are taxpayers subsidizing this moron getting psychiatric treatment for her made up PTSD. 

Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: dandi on January 16, 2014, 04:10:28 PM
Duhhh, I will love him and pat him and hug him and squeeze him.

[youtube=425,350]jPdHaNr0OAY[/youtube]
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: 67 Rover on January 16, 2014, 04:32:41 PM
[youtube=425,350]jPdHaNr0OAY[/youtube]

I had forgotten that was Daffy, I was thinking it was Sylvester.  Oh well two violent cartoons we will never see again.  :hyper:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Tess Anderson on January 16, 2014, 04:41:57 PM
She is delusional and there is some truth to her posts, but it's mostly fantasy. Just check out her journal entries at the DUmp two and three - coffee shops, free apartments, new beginnings are all themes.

Quote

Thu Jan 16, 2014, 02:20 PM

 Lady Freedom Returns (6,584 posts)


Yeah!!! I just a couple of more hours I get to see my Furniture!!!



 I get to go the the warehouse where the program I am in stores the furniture and household stuff at. They want to make sure it is to my liking.
 
This is actually for my mental state. The idea is to make sure I feel that this will be my home. This is all part of the grounding part of my Therapy. I am to let them know, without worry, if I don't like something.
 
This is very new and very odd to me. But yet I am giddy!!

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018556452

the other DUmbasses really shouldn't be encouraging her break with reality.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: JohnnyReb on January 16, 2014, 06:29:15 PM
DUmmie furniture: empty 5 gallon oil buckets for chairs, cement blocks and boards for tables and a cardboard box for a hope chest.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Traveshamockery on January 16, 2014, 06:39:16 PM
Quote
sweetapogee (729 posts)
7. Don't forget

to select a wine rack!


JFC!!!!!!!!!!!!  A wine rack?  Don't you mean a whine rack?  These people are just so freaking delusional. 

Pam Dawson must be incredibly jealous. 
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Charles Henrickson on January 16, 2014, 08:31:55 PM
A wine rack? . . . Pam Dawson must be incredibly jealous. 

Not Alex Brown, though. She has quite the rack.

Quote from: Lady Freedom Returns
10. No, no wine rack.

But I do have a 28 inch Flat screen!

Meh. Alex has a 38 incher, and it's far from flat.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Traveshamockery on January 16, 2014, 08:49:17 PM
As happy as her fellow DUmmies seem to be for Amber, you know they are all just seething with jealousy over Amber's tales of how great her life is right now. 

TVs! Furniture! Apartments! Cats! All falling from the sunny Tucson sky just for the asking for Miss Amber.  It's almost like she's a contestant on The Price is Right and she's won the DUmmie Showcase Showdown. 

However, as we all know, DUmmies lie; all the time, DUmmies lie.  Amber is no different. 
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Dori on January 16, 2014, 08:58:30 PM
TVs! Furniture! Apartments! Cats! All falling from the sunny Tucson sky just for the asking for Miss Amber.  It's almost like she's a contestant on The Price is Right and she's won the DUmmie Showcase Showdown. 

 :lol:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Chris_ on January 16, 2014, 09:23:39 PM
Quote
sweetapogee (729 posts)
7. Don't forget

to select a wine rack!
What food pairing does Wild Turkey go with?
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: DUmpsterDiver on January 16, 2014, 09:32:38 PM
What food pairing does Wild Turkey go with?

A glass and frozen ball bearings.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Chris_ on January 16, 2014, 09:34:48 PM
I hope Amber is able to place a sommelier on retainer.  Hate to see a quality wine rack go to waste. :rofl:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Skul on January 17, 2014, 07:08:14 AM
Not Alex Brown, though. She has quite the rack.

Meh. Alex has a 38 incher, and it's far from flat.
Two, from what I understand.  :naughty:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: RobJohnson on January 17, 2014, 09:50:47 AM
I hope Amber is able to place a sommelier on retainer.  Hate to see a quality wine rack go to waste. :rofl:

You just hate to see any "rack" go to waste.  :-)


Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Wineslob on January 17, 2014, 02:08:47 PM
So now she has her own "cat" to pet?
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Dori on January 17, 2014, 02:31:27 PM
So now she has her own "cat" to pet?

No. The cat is trained and is supposed to watch her for mood changes.  Maybe the cat can call the therapist if there is trouble in paradise.
Quote
Lady Freedom Returns (6,591 posts)

3. Thanks for the offer, but to one they want to get me is, get this...
trained to detect and react to my changing moods!

First off, I never knew a cat could be trained! Second, a cat to care for you, not think you are only there for them.

This is going to be different!

Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Chris_ on January 17, 2014, 02:36:06 PM
 :lol: :rofl: :rotf:

Will the cat sign up at DU too?
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Skul on January 17, 2014, 02:49:21 PM
That poor damn cat will look my avatar, 24 hours a day.  :lmao:



<<<<<<<<< Kitty
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: GOBUCKS on January 17, 2014, 02:55:28 PM
Quote
First off, I never knew a cat could be trained! Second, a cat to care for you, not think you are only there for them.

A trained companion cat.

Restaurants have to let 'em in.

Amber is trying to see how far she can push the envelope before the DUmp numbskulls start to show some doubt.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: jukin on January 17, 2014, 03:04:48 PM
The very first thing any professional in the psychiatry/psychological field should do is make sure DUchebags don't post on the DUmp. It is like crazy squared to go on there if you are not a mole.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Big Dog on January 17, 2014, 06:47:29 PM
No. The cat is trained and is supposed to watch her for mood changes.  Maybe the cat can call the therapist if there is trouble in paradise.


"911, what is your emergency?"

(http://www.culcheth.cats.org.uk/uploads/images/pages/cat%20on%20phone14.jpg)

"Meow."

(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RzEFo84j6T8/UKuHYFrJLyI/AAAAAAAAMvY/UFIkjKZ_w84/s400/Ambulance%2Bthrough%2BCentral%2BPk%2BTransverse%2BML.jpg)

(http://i1299.photobucket.com/albums/ag72/conscave/wtffz4_zpsbf2bfe95.jpg)

Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: JLO on January 17, 2014, 07:01:33 PM
 :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: I_B_Perky on January 17, 2014, 07:32:31 PM

Motorcycle girl isn't going to like her petting another kitty.    :-)

Bwahahahahaahahaha!!!!

H5 Mountaineer!!!  That one made me spit beer all over the monitor!!!   :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: I_B_Perky on January 17, 2014, 07:34:17 PM
The truth of the thing: The Tucson Tart told her shrink about her new GF, the Bike Dyke, and the shrink recommended that she "get a new *****".

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! H5 BD!!!! Didn't have a mouthful of beer this time... spewed it out with hillneck's comment!!!!
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: I_B_Perky on January 17, 2014, 07:39:41 PM
Why feed 'em? They'll go somewhere else if you don't put food out for them. Soon they'll wander onto the rifle range and get free shots at a moving target. And before you scream "cat killer!", most states consider a loose, uncollared kitty a non-indigenous predator, subject only to the possession of a current hunting license and not within city limits (Weapons discharge).

As far as a litter box - isn't there a park or better yet, a neighbor, nearby with a sandbox?

Besides, ask any cat around, it's a waste of time trying to train your human

Get some asians in the neighborhood and watch those cats disappear!!!!

Somewhere in this site is the story of me in an elevator one time with 3 guys and one of them was talking about all the feral cats around... until this asian family moved in. PM me if you want the story.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: tanstaafl on January 17, 2014, 07:44:24 PM
Get some asians in the neighborhood and watch those cats disappear!!!!

Somewhere in this site is the story of me in an elevator one time with 3 guys and one of them was talking about all the feral cats around... until this asian family moved in. PM me if you want the story.

Thanks, but no, Perky.

Heard it before. Vietnamese boat people. Sturgeon Bay, WI, stray dogs (and not so stray).

Poof
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Big Dog on January 17, 2014, 07:46:49 PM
:lol: :rofl: :rotf:

Will the cat sign up at DU too?

The cat will be registered to vote.

Democrat.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Traveshamockery on January 17, 2014, 08:18:31 PM
"911, what is your emergency?"

(http://www.culcheth.cats.org.uk/uploads/images/pages/cat%20on%20phone14.jpg)

"Meow."

(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RzEFo84j6T8/UKuHYFrJLyI/AAAAAAAAMvY/UFIkjKZ_w84/s400/Ambulance%2Bthrough%2BCentral%2BPk%2BTransverse%2BML.jpg)

(http://i1299.photobucket.com/albums/ag72/conscave/wtffz4_zpsbf2bfe95.jpg)




Epic!  The bunnies in the background really make it special. 

 :rofl: :rofl:
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Purple Sage on January 18, 2014, 04:24:40 AM
IF all this were true, I'd be worried about the cat.  Amber isn't capable of caring for herself, much less a cat.  I highly doubt any professional would *give* her an alley cat much less a specialty trained animal.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: tanstaafl on January 18, 2014, 08:24:19 AM
IF all this were true, I'd be worried about the cat.  Amber isn't capable of caring for herself, much less a cat.  I highly doubt any professional would *give* her an alley cat much less a specialty trained animal.

You don't really believe that a cat is trainable, do you? Amber would have better luck with a cockatoo, y'know, cat lunch.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Freeper on January 18, 2014, 02:27:40 PM
IF all this were true, I'd be worried about the cat.  Amber isn't capable of caring for herself, much less a cat.  I highly doubt any professional would *give* her an alley cat much less a specialty trained animal.

She couldn't keep a pet peeve alive.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: tanstaafl on January 18, 2014, 02:31:44 PM
She couldn't keep a pet peeve alive.

Don't worry. This "trainable" cat will learn how to escape from Amber.

Pretty soon, there will be posts on the DUmp from one "Amber's Kat" seeking donations and a link to wishadupe, Someone will front it some money for a bus ticket to San Diego where the cat will immediately become a stray, sleeping in the streets, eting from trash cns and McDonalds Dumpsters.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: BlueStateSaint on January 18, 2014, 02:58:57 PM
Don't worry. This "trainable" cat will learn how to escape from Amber.

Pretty soon, there will be posts on the DUmp from one "Amber's Kat" seeking donations and a link to wishadupe, Someone will front it some money for a bus ticket to San Diego where the cat will immediately become a stray, sleeping in the streets, eting from trash cns and McDonalds Dumpsters.

And, whatever it writes will probably be better than what graces the East County Magazine.  (It will have to cross a Rubicon on an arc to get there, though.)
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: NHSparky on January 18, 2014, 06:43:55 PM
Most places where deadbeats are given free furnished apartments and free wi-fi and gorgeous flooring and new furniture encourage pets. They get free pets, free pet food, and free veterinarian services.

I don't know about you, but I'm about ready to pull up stakes and move to Tucson. Can you imagine how well they must treat people who work?

Like shit--because someone has to pay for all these deadbeats.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Purple Sage on January 19, 2014, 12:39:08 AM
You don't really believe that a cat is trainable, do you? Amber would have better luck with a cockatoo, y'know, cat lunch.

Good point. 

Some cats are somewhat trainable.  My daughter has hers walking on a leash, staying off the "NO!" things such as counters and tables, meowing at door to go outside to potty that he does on-leash, licks her nose when she says, "Gimme kisses.", doesn't sharpen his claws inside.

Basically, she treated this cat as a dog from kittenhood and it behaves pretty much like one.  He even hangs with the dog as opposed to the other two cats.  Unfortunately, he also has some undesirable dog attributes such as separation anxiety... Yowling up a storm when my daughter is on the other side of a closed door that will go on for quite a long time.

But training a cat for Amber-type needs?  There may be some DUmmies out there trying to do it. You know DUmmies.  I can't imagine doing it successfully, though.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: Bad Dog on January 19, 2014, 12:34:06 PM
The companion cat settled it for me.  Amber is a pretty balsy mole and her remarkable run may be coming to an end.
Title: Re: Amber sees a new pyschiatrist - advised to get a cat
Post by: GOBUCKS on January 19, 2014, 02:08:00 PM
As a kid I trained my sister's cat. It would come running to go with me whenever I took my turbocharged BB gun out the back door.

As I prowled around out back the cat would be right by my side.

Whenever I aimed the BB gun, it would go on point like an English pointer, staring in the direction the gun was aimed.

When I shot, if a sparrow or starling came fluttering down, she would be on it the second it hit the ground, and if I missed I'd get a disgusted scowl.

She was a lousy retriever, but I guess she'd qualify as a companion cat.