The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: franksolich on August 02, 2013, 12:08:42 PM

Title: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: franksolich on August 02, 2013, 12:08:42 PM
http://www.democraticunderground.com/11429296

Oh my.

Now, we all know when a primitive says "I have a friend" or "I have a brother [or sister]," with some sort of peculiar problem, it's really the primitive; this is one of their oldest and stalest tricks.

Quote
leftyladyfrommo (6,706 posts)    Fri Aug 2, 2013, 11:16 AM

Help. Problem with fecal incontinence and collapse

I have a friend who is just having a terrible time. Only happens every so often. But this is a typical scenario.
 
She is 68.

Yesterday she went to the grocery store - one of the big ones where she had to walk quite a ways to get around the store. And she had to walk a ways to get to the store from the parking lot.
 
She said she was fine. And then she just collapsed and lost all control of her bowels. This episode was worse than previous ones in that it took her longer to kind of come around. The store called for an ambulance and she was transported to Emergency Room. They check for bladder infection and did blood work and then sent her home.
 
This has happened to her several times. Sometimes she just loses control of her bowels and has to turn around and go home to get cleaned up. But other times she just kind of collapses. Usually she can make it to a bench or chair. And sometimes she just lays down there until she can make it back to her car.
 
Her sister also has episodes of fecal incontinence.

Has anyone heard of this problem? Any clues? Since she comes back out of it pretty quickly the doctors just get her back on her feet and send her home. But this is starting to seriously affect her life. She is getting afraid to leave the house except for very small excursions.

The primitives are blaming things such as neurological disorders and heart problems, but I suspect the problem's more basic than that.

<<<suggests the primitive add fiber and roughage to her diet.
Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: Bad Dog on August 02, 2013, 12:21:38 PM
I would pay good money to witness left lady collapsing in a grocery store and crapping herself. I would hope the event would be accompanied by a huge burst of flatus.  It will be interesting to see how many more DUmmies have "friends" with a similar affliction.
Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: Condition1 on August 02, 2013, 12:22:25 PM
I think the Federal Gov't has the same problem....i.e., 'fecal collapsing' all over the citizenry and the Bill of Rights.
Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: 67 Rover on August 02, 2013, 12:31:01 PM
I would pay good money to witness left lady collapsing in a grocery store and crapping herself. I would hope the event would be accompanied by a huge burst of flatus.  It will be interesting to see how many more DUmmies have "friends" with a similar affliction.

That's a You Tube video I would gladly sit through the advertisements for.  :rofl:

Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: Rebel on August 02, 2013, 12:38:44 PM
These people will post about ANYTHING.  :thatsright:
Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: Dori on August 02, 2013, 12:39:34 PM
Why would that cause someone to collapse?



 
Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: franksolich on August 02, 2013, 12:40:37 PM
These people will post about ANYTHING.  :thatsright:

Not quite.

I've seen a lot on Skins's island, but there's one certain intimate act I haven't ever seen a primitive post about.

But I'm sure it'll come, sooner or later.
Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: jukin on August 02, 2013, 02:24:43 PM
Not quite.

I've seen a lot on Skins's island, but there's one certain intimate act I haven't ever seen a primitive post about.

But I'm sure it'll come, sooner or later.

Giving someone a job? A legitimate job. Not illegally paying an illegal to do work the DUche wouldn't do in the yard.
Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: JohnnyReb on August 02, 2013, 02:26:40 PM
Solution: Eat more government cheese.
Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: DumbAss Tanker on August 02, 2013, 02:41:25 PM
This is what comes from years of sticking stuff in your butt.  Time for the old gal to buy some adult diapers.
Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: jukin on August 02, 2013, 03:17:14 PM
This is what comes form years of sticking stuff in your butt.  Time for the old gal to buy some adult diapers.

^5

Rectum dysfunction.
Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: Mr Mannn on August 02, 2013, 05:47:24 PM
Quote
leftyladyfrommo (6,706 posts)    Fri Aug 2, 2013, 11:16 AM

Has anyone heard of this problem? Any clues?
Multiple choice answer:
A) global warming.
B) Bush's fault
C) Racism.
Title: Re: primitive from Missouri has loose bowels
Post by: Splashdown on August 02, 2013, 05:51:34 PM
DUmmies are so full of shit, that sometimes, it just leaks out. That would be my best scientific guess.