The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: franksolich on May 26, 2013, 08:52:21 AM
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http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018396905
Oh my.
The Taverner primitive's seemed rather morbid lately.
One hopes he has the telephone number for the suicide hotline handy.
Nah, one doesn't hope.
Taverner (53,358 posts) Sun May 26, 2013, 03:05 AM
All humans should die at their choice, from opiate overdose
Seriously - is there a better way to go out?
Wasted, putty, good times....
But when you CHOOSE to die, not when some other force dictates so...
I want 500 years dammit!
Then, some kind of Opiate OD when I choose it so!
ON EDIT:
My point being Opiates are tools for dying, not living.
Ooops, someone disagrees.
sigmasix (430 posts) Sun May 26, 2013, 04:11 AM
2. I've been at death's door 3 times
Due to unbelievably messed-up cancer tumors and other severe medical problems I have stood at the threshold of death 3 times. The oncologists and the surgeons all said I would not survive the surgeries I needed to save my life. I had to say "goodbye" to my children and my wife each time because there was almost universal agreement that I would perish due to the severity and timing of the surgeries. My experiences were strange and difficult to describe. Needless to say, I continue to survive and we are hopeful that a new chemotherapy drug will represent additional years for my struggle.
My life has become a numbing littany of chemotherapy, incredible illness and fatigue, horrible side effects and loss of mobility. Most people I know tell me that they would have given up long ago- I'm in the middle of my 10th year of battling this cancer and I have lost 240 pounds and innumerable feet of intestine and organs as well as a good portion of my liver and both greater and lesser omentums. I require a great deal of opiate-derived medication to simply function; Morphine, tincture of opium, dilaudid, muscle relaxants and assorted anti nausea medications. Without them my already dismal quality of life would be greatly worse.
I'm unhappy that I have cancer, but I view it as an oportunity and the near-death experiences have allowed me an unincumbered vision of what is truly important.
It's the struggle itself that is worthy; no matter the final outcome. By fighting against going quietly into that great darkness we are showing that the human will to fight for life against incredible odds is alive and well.
I'm glad I was never offered a short, painless way out when I was told about my chances for survival because even though my life quality sucks, at lease I get to be here and share with my loved ones and friends~ when all is said and done it is how you are remembered by those that loved you that matters the most. Give them a hero to remember- fight the fight until there is no need for the fight- you don't "win" this fight by vanquishing the disease that kills you; you win by fighting to begin with.
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I want to go out in a shoot out with federal authorities surrounded by empty liquor bottles as my squad of machinegun toting Brazilian bikini models fights valiantly by my side.
yeah
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sigmasix (430 posts) Sun May 26, 2013, 04:11 AM
2. I've been at death's door 3 times
Due to unbelievably messed-up cancer tumors and other severe medical problems I have stood at the threshold of death 3 times. The oncologists and the surgeons all said I would not survive the surgeries I needed to save my life. I had to say "goodbye" to my children and my wife each time because there was almost universal agreement that I would perish due to the severity and timing of the surgeries. My experiences were strange and difficult to describe. Needless to say, I continue to survive and we are hopeful that a new chemotherapy drug will represent additional years for my struggle.
My life has become a numbing littany of chemotherapy, incredible illness and fatigue, horrible side effects and loss of mobility. Most people I know tell me that they would have given up long ago- I'm in the middle of my 10th year of battling this cancer and I have lost 240 pounds and innumerable feet of intestine and organs as well as a good portion of my liver and both greater and lesser omentums. I require a great deal of opiate-derived medication to simply function; Morphine, tincture of opium, dilaudid, muscle relaxants and assorted anti nausea medications. Without them my already dismal quality of life would be greatly worse.
Well, DUmmie, you should probably know that January 1st of next year will be a game changer for you because an opiate suicide is about all you're going to get.
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The only people who could want to live 500 years are those who have no hope.
KC
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Well, DUmmie, you should probably know that January 1st of next year will be a game changer for you because an opiate suicide is about all you're going to get...
...from the government approved list of treatments for your condition.
Edited to clarify :II:
Enjoy your shortened stay among us, DUmmie sigmasix. You GOT the government you voted for.
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Taverner (53,358 posts)
All humans should die at their choice, from opiate overdose
I want 500 years dammit!
Then, some kind of Opiate OD when I choose it so!
Translation from DUmmy-ese to modern English.
Taverner (53,358 posts)
I want to live for 500 years doing drugs and leeching off of the rest of you.
I don't want to work. I want free money, free needles and cheap drugs.
and then, only when I'm done will I charge you wage slaves another arm and leg to use assisted suicide provided by Obamacare. I'm not paying for it-why should I worry.
and one last thing: no guns for you.
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Translation from DUmmy-ese to modern English.
I do believe that you're dead-on target. H5.
ETA: Said primitive has probably been told to knock off the drugs to be able to get a job, and he's going through some serious withdrawl from the stuff.
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I don't want to die, but to be like Enoch, walk with the Lord, and ultimately to be carried up to heaven.
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Translation from DUmmy-ese to modern English.
H5!!!!
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Everybody would like to have a say in how they die. Don't happen that way. But, as is typical the DUmmy can't live life on life's terms.
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I had a friend when I was in my early 20's who said he wanted to be in an auto accident where he was pinned in the car, the firemen are just about to free him using the jaws-of-life, when somebody yells "EVERYBODY BACK!! SHE'S GONNA BLOW!!"
I didn't say my friend was right in the head.
.
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Morphine, tincture of opium, dilaudid, muscle relaxants and assorted anti nausea medications. Without them my already dismal quality of life would be greatly worse.
That half-dead DUmmy better hope DUmmy Taverner Kregel never figures out where he lives.
That menu sounds like heaven in earth to Kregel.
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Holy shit! I'm goin fishin!
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Sounds like Sigmasix has been at death's door his whole life. I don't know how he managed to snare a wife and have kids with her.
But anyway, you're right, it's all over next year.
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One hopes he has the telephone number for the suicide hotline handy.
In a perfect world, coach, Tav would call the suicide hotline only to find it's been outsourced to Pakistan, and they'll ask him if he knows how to drive a truck.
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In a perfect world, coach, Tav would call the suicide hotline only to find it's been outsourced to Pakistan, and they'll ask him if he knows how to drive a truck.
Good Job Sparky and a ^5 .
Me I have to take a cue from Jackie Kennedy, she gathered all her love ones and family, spoke to each individually, explained her choice, went into her bedroom and did what was necessary to end her suffering and go out with dignity.
She may have seen the horrid photos of poor Bess Truman carried out of a nursing home at her death and decided she would rather go out with class then that way.
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In a perfect world, coach, Tav would call the suicide hotline only to find it's been outsourced to Pakistan, and they'll ask him if he knows how to drive a truck.
:lmao:
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In a perfect world, coach, Tav would call the suicide hotline only to find it's been outsourced to Pakistan, and they'll ask him if he knows how to drive a truck.
If they were smart they wouldn't waste a perfectly good truck on Tav. They would just strap a chest bomb to him. It would be like that scene in Blazing Saddles where Taggert said something about losing a good $400 hand cart.
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The only people who could want to live 500 years are those who have no hope.
KC
Yeah, I love it here and hope to enjoy a long life, but no way do I want to put up with this place for 500 years.