The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: Freeper on April 19, 2013, 10:38:12 PM

Title: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Freeper on April 19, 2013, 10:38:12 PM
Quote
jaysunb (7,945 posts)

This Sunday, in churches all across America


 
we will hear (especially in the south and plains states)

GOD IS ANGRY WITH AMERICA, because
1) abortion
2) gays
3) liburals
4) non Bible thumpers
5) A-rabs/Islam
6) women not being submissive

Solution...put a little extra in the plate and pray harder. 

http://sync.democraticunderground.com/10022718125

 :mental:

Quote
Dreamer Tatum (7,048 posts)
16. You are a blithering idiot. nt

I swear this guy is one of us.  :-)
Yeah I know he has said some batshit crazy stuff, but who's mole hasn't?  :-)

Quote
Union Scribe (4,528 posts)
19. Never miss an opportunity to swing

that chip on your shoulder. Rule 1 of being a dick online.

Quote
jaysunb (7,945 posts)
20. That's a bit personal...wouldn't you say ?

You can dish it out, but you can't take it in. Typical DUmmy.

Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: 98ZJUSMC on April 20, 2013, 04:38:18 AM
Quote
jaysunb (7,945 posts)

This Sunday, in churches all across America


 
we will hear (especially in the south and plains states)

GOD IS ANGRY WITH AMERICA, because
1) abortion
2) gays
3) liburals
4) non Bible thumpers
5) A-rabs/Islam
6) women not being submissive

Solution...put a little extra in the plate and pray harder.

No.  Right now, we are working on a Reverse Rapture® where you clowns disappear and we stay and clean up the mess.

Quote
6) women not being submissive

I realize that it would be too much to ask you infants to grow up.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: MrsSmith on April 20, 2013, 05:34:02 AM
We actually are pretty sure to hear appeals to pray for the people of Boston, those involved in the Marathon from across the world, and the people of West, Texas.  It's quite possible that there will be a Love donation taken up to divide between whatever charities are most involved in assisting.  It's even possible some place like "8 Days of Hope" already is planning a clean-up week in West, and we may hear that information, too. :-)
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: jtyangel on April 20, 2013, 05:59:05 AM
Hate to burst your bubbles dummies but any church I've ever attended is usually involved with coordinating donations, cash, or physical assistance when something like this happens. Perhaps the acknowledgment of sin and the need for the Savior(this about the terrorists who allowed themselves to be consumed with sin and how it worked out for not only the victims but themselves, not to mention WE are included in that umbrella of doing wrong against one another in our own way--we are not spared since all are stained by sin) but little else about what you mentioned and certainly not in your hateful, uneducated context when they may be addressed. What these dingbats never seem to get is sin is sin--when that is covered it is an umbrella over all sinful behavior including the prideful, hateful rantings of certain liberal Christaphobes.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: AprilRazz on April 20, 2013, 06:05:55 AM
Quote
jaysunb (7,945 posts)

This Sunday, in churches all across America


 
we will hear (especially in the south and plains states)

GOD IS ANGRY WITH AMERICA, because
1) abortion
2) gays
3) liburals
4) non Bible thumpers
5) A-rabs/Islam
6) women not being submissive

Solution...put a little extra in the plate and pray harder. 
Hate to break it to you primitives but that is your guy.
(http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/45492000/jpg/_45492179_phelps.jpg)
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: MrsSmith on April 20, 2013, 09:43:00 AM
Hate to break it to you primitives but that is your guy.
(http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/45492000/jpg/_45492179_phelps.jpg)
Yep, ran for office as a Dim, loved Al Gore, left to the core.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Dori on April 20, 2013, 09:50:01 AM
Maybe you DUmmies should try going to church once and find out what it's all about. 

Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: USA4ME on April 20, 2013, 11:02:17 AM
Even if that was preached, what would the primitives care?

These libs don't like to be held to any moral standards except the one's where they write the rules.  All this lib is telling me is that one day, if they can, they'll make it against the law to hold religious beliefs of which they don't approve.  They might want to ask the Romans how that whole "suppression of Christianity" eventually worked out.  I see Christianity still exists.  Where's the Roman Empire these days except in the history books?

.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: DefiantSix on April 20, 2013, 11:39:58 AM
No.  Right now, we are working on a Reverse Rapture® where you clowns disappear and we stay and clean up the mess.

I realize that it would be too much to ask you infants to grow up.

 :rotf: :hi5:
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Tucker on April 20, 2013, 01:09:49 PM
Quote
GOD IS ANGRY WITH AMERICA, because
1) abortion
2) gays
3) liburals
4) non Bible thumpers
5) A-rabs/Islam
6) women not being submissive

Makes sense to me.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Toastedturningtidelegs on April 20, 2013, 01:22:30 PM
Quote
jaysunb (7,945 posts)

This Sunday, in churches all across America


 
we will hear (especially in the south and plains states)

GOD IS ANGRY WITH AMERICA, because
1) abortion
2) gays
3) liburals
4) non Bible thumpers
5) A-rabs/Islam
6) women not being submissive

Solution...put a little extra in the plate and pray harder. 
  :whatever: I don't think I have ever heard my priest talk about a single one of those topics. Maybe abortion when they decide to take a collection for one of the pregnancy crisis centers or for one of the many orgs feeding the hungry and sheltering the homeless.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Freeper on April 20, 2013, 01:37:47 PM
  :whatever: I don't think I have ever heard my priest talk about a single one of those topics. Maybe abortion when they decide to take a collection for one of the pregnancy crisis centers or for one of the many orgs feeding the hungry and sheltering the homeless.

Well to be fair, the DUmmies don't actually go to church, so the fact that they are totally ignorant about what goes on in one is not surprising. Like everything else in life they depend solely on what they are told to believe, they never bother to find answers on their own.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: FlippyDoo on April 20, 2013, 01:54:56 PM
I haven't read any of the Cave responses, but as the resident fictional spirit-guide I feel that since a real church service is a spiritual event that I'm qualified to respond.

This Sunday, in real churches all across America (ESPECIALLY in the south and plains states), we will hear pastors and priests requesting prayers for those who are affected. In many they will also pray for the soul of the perpetrators (who is apparently a member of your 'religion of peace') and for the family of the perpetrators. In many they will discuss what can be done for those affected and will work toward doing it.

There is really no need to mention abortion, homosexuals, liberals, atheists, Islam, or women not being submissive.

I say this because any real sane person already knows that God is not happy with the wholesale murder of innocent unborn babies. Nor is He pleased with the perversion of homosexuality. Nor is He pleased with the God-less liberals and/or atheists who are trying to turn this country into a modern day Sodom and Gomorrah. Nor is He pleased with the muslims who claim to be the religion of peace and murder people who don't agree with them like liberals murder unborn babies.

As for the 'women not being submissive' thing, you're just an idiot who has proven that you have no idea about that which you speak.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Freeper on April 20, 2013, 02:01:03 PM
I haven't read any of the Cave responses, but as the resident fictional spirit-guide I feel that since a real church service is a spiritual event that I'm qualified to respond.

This Sunday, in real churches all across America (ESPECIALLY in the south and plains states), we will hear pastors and priests requesting prayers for those who are affected. In many they will also pray for the soul of the perpetrators (who is apparently a member of your 'religion of peace') and for the family of the perpetrators. In many they will discuss what can be done for those affected and will work toward doing it.

There is really no need to mention abortion, homosexuals, liberals, atheists, Islam, or women not being submissive.

I say this because any real sane person already knows that God is not happy with the wholesale murder of innocent unborn babies. Nor is He pleased with the perversion of homosexuality. Nor is He pleased with the God-less liberals and/or atheists who are trying to turn this country into a modern day Sodom and Gomorrah. Nor is He pleased with the muslims who claim to be the religion of peace and murder people who don't agree with them like liberals murder unborn babies.

As for the 'women not being submissive' thing, you're just an idiot who has proven that you have no idea about that which you speak.

They don't understand submissive unless it involves you being the one with a dog collar around your neck and chained to the bed.
They get the idea that somehow if a wife submits to her husband that means he has total control over her, which is not the case. Men submit to their wives every time they get dragged to some family event they don't want to go to or taking her to the mall stuff like that. In every healthy relationship both people will submit at one time or another, but they will always work together on the big decisions.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: FlaGator on April 20, 2013, 02:08:45 PM
I'm not sure how a DUer would know what gets said in a church. I always suspected that they'd burst in to flames right after walking through the church doors.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: DefiantSix on April 20, 2013, 02:13:05 PM
I'm not sure how a DUer would know what gets said in a church. I always suspected that they'd burst in to flames right after walking through the church doors.

Who'd have thunk that the Good Lord's "healing white light" was a 1.21 gigawatt laser beam...
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Aristotelian on April 20, 2013, 02:25:44 PM
Maybe you DUmmies should try going to church once and find out what it's all about.

They'd better be careful, during Easter lots of Catholic churches start Mass sprinkling the faithful with holy water...I can imagine this being the sort of scene...

[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQJ8WrKnLUs[/youtube]
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Mr Mannn on April 20, 2013, 02:46:32 PM
Well to be fair, the DUmmies don't actually go to church, so the fact that they are totally ignorant about what goes on in one is not surprising. Like everything else in life they depend solely on what they are told to believe, they never bother to find answers on their own.
Yep. Just like good little brain washed sheep: They salivate with ignorant hatred when they hear the Pavlovian bell. They are no different from the Boston terrorists. They merely wait for their master's call.

No one can wallow in such hatred and not become a monster.
Title: Re: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Ralph Wiggum on April 20, 2013, 04:26:38 PM
I don't attend church often, but certainly have in the past.  But I have never heard any of these issues discussed in a church setting.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Ballygrl on April 20, 2013, 05:30:59 PM
Our Priest at Mass was just horrible tonight! he said not to focus on the people who committed the crime but focus on the good we saw in people coming together and helping each other, and praise to those who came to the aid of those in need.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Mr Mannn on April 20, 2013, 06:50:48 PM
Our Priest at Mass was just horrible tonight! he said not to focus on the people who committed the crime but focus on the good we saw in people coming together and helping each other, and praise to those who came to the aid of those in need.
God bless that man! and God bless you, by the way!
[DU Mode] How horrible! Your priest deliberately did not mention Unions and never blamed Bush! [/DU mode]
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: BlueStateSaint on April 20, 2013, 07:05:28 PM
God bless that man! and God bless you, by the way!
[DU Mode] How horrible! Your priest deliberately did not mention Unions and never blamed Bush! [/DU mode]

I'd have to agree with you on this.  The whole 'love the sinner, hate the sin' bit and all that.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Tucker on April 20, 2013, 07:06:56 PM
Our Priest at Mass was just horrible tonight! he said not to focus on the people who committed the crime but focus on the good we saw in people coming together and helping each other, and praise to those who came to the aid of those in need.

One thing is for certain. I'd make a lousy priest.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Freeper on April 20, 2013, 11:06:07 PM
Our Priest at Mass was just horrible tonight! he said not to focus on the people who committed the crime but focus on the good we saw in people coming together and helping each other, and praise to those who came to the aid of those in need.

Was that before or after he said God hates fags?
Because according to the DUmmies that is in every sermon.  :rotf:
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Carl on April 21, 2013, 07:24:42 AM
It is odd because the only churches that ever seem to talk political stuff rather then the Gospel of Christ are leftist ones.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Ballygrl on April 21, 2013, 08:07:39 AM
Was that before or after he said God hates fags?
Because according to the DUmmies that is in every sermon. :rotf:

It was before he went on an anti-gay, anti-poor, anti-Obama, anti-Democrat, anti-birth control, anti-Venezuela, anti-abortion, anti-Muslim rant.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Ballygrl on April 21, 2013, 08:10:08 AM
It is odd because the only churches that ever seem to talk political stuff rather then the Gospel of Christ are leftist ones.

I've gone to Mass all my life, during the Homily only 1 time was homosexuality spoken about and all that was said was "love the sinner hate the sin", abortion has been spoken about a few times, yes a few times, and it was discussed in the context of "respecting the sanctity of life".
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: AprilRazz on April 21, 2013, 08:20:34 AM
It was prayers for the victims, the LEO's and thankfulness that it was over at temple yesterday. The Rabbi saved all the hatefulness for the end. :wink:
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: redwhit on April 21, 2013, 03:54:17 PM
I've gone to Mass all my life, during the Homily only 1 time was homosexuality spoken about and all that was said was "love the sinner hate the sin", abortion has been spoken about a few times, yes a few times, and it was discussed in the context of "respecting the sanctity of life".

We must go to similar churches.  In the years that I've been going to my current parish, I don't think I've ever heard preaching like what's listed in the DU post.

Maybe that poster got the religion wrong? 
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: WinOne4TheGipper on April 21, 2013, 04:55:31 PM
http://sync.democraticunderground.com/10022718125

 :mental:

I swear this guy is one of us.  :-)
Yeah I know he has said some batshit crazy stuff, but who's mole hasn't?  :-)

You can dish it out, but you can't take it in. Typical DUmmy.



Hmm, that's funny.  The pastor at the church I went to preached a sermon on Jesus being the Good Shepherd who looks after his flock.  This was one of those scary LCMS churches.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: WinOne4TheGipper on April 21, 2013, 05:06:33 PM
No.  Right now, we are working on a Reverse Rapture® where you clowns disappear and we stay and clean up the mess.

I realize that it would be too much to ask you infants to grow up.

Wow.  It's like you went to the same church I did. :-)
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: JohnnyReb on April 21, 2013, 05:09:47 PM
I guess I Got a double dose of hate today.....I just came from an Eagle Scout award ceremony.
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: BlueStateSaint on April 21, 2013, 06:16:18 PM
We must go to similar churches.  In the years that I've been going to my current parish, I don't think I've ever heard preaching like what's listed in the DU post.

Maybe that poster got the religion wrong? 

My priest mentioned "the week's events" only in passing, and then almost as an afterthought.  But, as we left after Mass, my wife mentioned that whoever had picked the music for the Mass today picked songs that fit the week's events perfectly (at least to her).  I looked at her and smiled (I'm one of the four or five people that selects the music).  She got it after a while, saying that the Holy Spirit works through what He is given to work with.  Again, I did one of these: O-)
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: Toastedturningtidelegs on April 21, 2013, 06:47:21 PM
My priest mentioned "the week's events" only in passing, and then almost as an afterthought.  But, as we left after Mass, my wife mentioned that whoever had picked the music for the Mass today picked songs that fit the week's events perfectly (at least to her).  I looked at her and smiled (I'm one of the four or five people that selects the music).  She got it after a while, saying that the Holy Spirit works through what He is given to work with.  Again, I did one of these: O-)
It was Good Shepherd Sunday! We talked about how to be better shepherds in our families and communities! Hmmmm...Father must have forgotten to serve up the "Kill all liberals and gays" meme!  :-)
Title: Re: This Sunday, in churches all across America
Post by: AprilRazz on April 22, 2013, 05:43:03 AM
I guess I Got a double dose of hate today.....I just came from an Eagle Scout award ceremony.
As a proud mom of an Eagle Scout, I know that young man did more work in just planning his project than most primitives do in their whole lives.