The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: CactusCarlos on April 12, 2013, 04:54:48 PM
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http://www.democraticunderground.com/10022661346
TeeYiYi (4,514 posts)
"MY 12 year old is pregnant. FOR REAL."...
This is a subthread that needs some DU love. The subthread was started late last night and is continuing into today. You may not know about it because the OP is from February so posting to the thread no longer kicks it to the top of GD.
The poster is new to DU and I believe sincerely could use some advice. I gave it a shot but I don't have the answers for her.
Her name is MichelleB and she is new to DU. Welcome MichelleB! I truly hope that reposting your first post in GD gets you some answers. (She can't post her own OP yet... I'll post a link to this new thread in the other subthread.)
Link to original thread where I found her post: http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=2658955
MichelleB (3 posts)
37. MY 12 year old is pregnant. FOR REAL.
This is gunna sound truly crazy but my daughter who is twelve is pregnant. I am so not happy about it. And I'm trying to find out what my rights are. I live in the state of Vermont, and seem to have no rights. I have begge and pleaded for her to abort. I've showed her all the medical risks and labor videos. And still all I get is, nothing. She seems to think shed be a murderer. But to carry on is murder to her self. She won't listen to reason or anything else. Now, because she's so young, I'm responsibile to make sure she's going to appointments and all else. But I have no say weather she keeps it or not?? She's only in the 7th grade. Not even in high school. Never even changed a diaper. And no, I'm not a parent that lets there children go gallavanting at all hours and acting like little hood rats. Simply put, she lied to me about where she was going and who she was going with. Long story short we find ourself in this situation. A f'ed up crappy one at that. She's only 7 weeks and her hands and feet are already so swollen it hurts for her o walk. If anyone has any legal information to help me with, PLEASE do so. Or any moms in this situation PLEASE HELP. I'm dying on the inside!!
Rhiannon12866 (53,826 posts)
38. I am so sorry for your dilemma, MichelleB!
Since this discussion was from February, you might get a better response if you posted in one of these groups. Welcome to DU and hope that you get both support and some answers here.
Parenting (Group)
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=forum&id=1160
Pro-Choice (Group)
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=forum&id=1152
Vermont (Group)
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=forum&id=1080
MichelleB (3 posts)
39. Thanks!!
thanks!! Unfortunately I haven't responded to enough links to start my own? Kinda odd. Anyway, in this situation, due to the whole patient privacy acts, I never had to be informed that she was pregnant. Yet because she went to planned parenthood, because I had scheduled the appointment, they contacted DCF and I know have them watching to make sure I make her go to all the appointments. Yet I don't have to be informed of them?? And when at the appointment, she had no idea WHAT a spectulm was or what it did. She was all for aborting until the boyfriend had something to say about it. He'd leave her. She was a murderer and everything else he could fill her head with. Doctors told her about her risks but she doesn't acknowledge. Yet, she didn't even know what the term bowel movement was!! Not that u would really expect a twelve year old too!! Yet.. Once again.. I get no say. I don't understand how that works. But god forbid she's not making the appointments!! I'm held responsible!! Not to mention, I'm not in a good spot financially yet who will end up paying for it?? She can't. She is t even old enough to get welfare. So what to do??
Rhiannon12866 (53,826 posts)
40. Perhaps you need to talk to an attorney?
Since she is a young child and you are responsible for her, wouldn't you be her medical proxy? If would also help if you had a sympathetic doctor or someone at Planned Parenthood who's experienced in counseling who could speak to her.
The dangers are obvious, but what about the rest of her life? Teenagers have trouble looking ahead and seeing the big picture, only live in the now, so I can't imagine how it is with a 12-year-old child. She's certainly not old enough to live on her own, get a job, and legally she needs to be in school.
Do you know the boyfriend's parents? A touchy subject, especially if he's just as young, but they have to be having the same feelings that you are, if they know. I'd find a responsible counselor, someone she sees as impartial who might be able to explain the facts to her who she might listen to.
You really do have a dilemma and there has to be some help out there. And someone on DU might be able to steer you in the right direction... You can start your own thread after 10 replies.
MichelleB (3 posts)
41. So frustrating.
Yes. As a minor, I am her proxy but when it comes to this, the abortion law is her body her choice. And if she was even 15, though I wouldn't want that either, I wouldn't try to push abortion on her. But she's not even old enough to know what the term bowel movement is yet!! She's not responsible or mature enough to make that choice. She doesn't know what it's like to be pregnant. She hasn't even had a babysitting job yet!! Never mind that she's only had her period a year and just started blooming. She doesn't even where a coat with out an argument!! What does that say?? I've talked to family court and I'm told there really isn't much I can do. The boyfriends parents want her to keep it!! That'd crazy!! He's 15. She's not. An yet nothing I can do. I think in this situation it should be my choice and not hers. As she just doesn't kno what's best for herself yet!!
Rhiannon12866 (53,826 posts)
42. Well, I happen to agree with you. She's way too young to make such decisions.
And this is her life you're talking about. She has no idea at such a young age. Perhaps you could talk to someone at Planned Parenthood or to a counselor to advise her. Certainly no one her own age can possibly have a clue. She's just a child, so can't be expected to understand, and it makes no sense that the boyfriend's parents can't realize that. We're not even talking about a teenager here. Since you are her medical proxy, and her parent and guardian, that should count for a lot. I'd still consult a lawyer and/or an experienced counselor, since it's not just a difference of opinion, but a child who needs help to make a decision that's in her own interest, which she's just not capable of at such a young age. I am so sorry that you're faced with this...
TeeYiYi (4,506 posts)
43. Michelle, I just want to say...
...that I am so sorry for your situation. A very enlightening and thought provoking post. Btw, welcome to DU.
You've got me thinking about something that I never imagined might be an issue. As I sit here, not in your position, I tell myself that if I were in your situation I would have taken my daughter to the doctor or PP and had them give her the morning after pill. That shows you how ignorant I am on such things.
My next step would be the abortion but I'm sitting her stunned to find out that you have no say in this matter. That you can't, as the mother of a 12 year old daughter, authorize her to receive an abortion.
Maybe you could take her to some kind of counseling to try to help her choose the abortion on her own.
I not some crazy pro abortion advocate that pushes abortion on everyone. I just think that if there was ever a case for early pregnancy termination, this would be it.
Having a baby is not a decision that should be taken lightly, and should in the real world, be given plenty of forethought and planning. Decisions that your daughter is not mature enough to make or emotionally capable of making at her age. She is still a child!
My opinion, possibly not a popular opinion, is that accidental pregnancy in a 12 year old girl, for whatever reason, should be treated as an illness/accident and treated accordingly. Your child gets pneumonia, you give them penicillin. Broken arm, you have the break set with a cast. Pregnancy...you terminate the pregnancy.
Ok, I've gone on long enough. I'm just so surprised that you don't have more legal say in your situation.
I wish you the best.
TYY
In_The_Wind (40,523 posts)
44. Welcome to DU, MichelleB.
How is your primary care physician handling your daughter's current medical problems brought on by this pregnancy? She needs counseling with a social worker.
TYY
Some of them are suspecting trolling.
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You can't make this shit up....ooooooorrrrrrrrr can you?
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The abortion doctor is busy at the moment but he may be able to work the youngster in after court one day.
http://news.yahoo.com/why-dr-kermit-gosnells-trial-major-news-story-104719415--politics.html
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Wow. What a lucky little twelve year old girl to have survived the most dangerous environment on earth, a liberal mothers womb. The number of buzzards circling above waiting for a carcass is disgusting.
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http://www.democraticunderground.com/10022661346
Some of them are suspecting trolling.
I did too until I noticed the spelling. I figure it's either a true DUer or a very talented mole.
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Some of them are suspecting trolling.
Read through the thread about 30 minutes ago.
They're only suspicious because they know they're being watched. They want so badly to admit they want the gov't to force this girl to abort they can't stand it. They dare not say it, but their viewpoints leap off the page, it's just so obvious.
.
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You know if this is true I'd like to say that if you just had stronger morals than you wouldn't be having this problem. But you know, freedom to do whatever without consequences has its consequences. You know the whole thing about the daughter being a murderer if she aborted couldn't have been from the school or media. I highly doubt she goes to church to hear that.
Also DUmmy, if you force her to abort you're only creating more problems for yourself. Your daughter will probably grow up hating you, and when your Welfare and social security dry up the only one who can possibly support you will be your daughter. You'll probably die broken and depressed because you caused this problem. Looks like you'll get the abortion you wanted 12 years late.
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And no, I'm not a parent that lets there children go gallavanting at all hours and acting like little hood rats.
:racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist: :racist:
And one more time.
:racist:
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I did too until I noticed the spelling. I figure it's either a true DUer or a very talented mole.
Talented?
It's such a weak, transparent effort at trolling even the halfwitted DUmpmonkeys, who need a sign to recognize sarcasm, saw through it almost immediately.
Just think how bad a troll it is that can't even deceive a DUmmy.
This tale of the twelve-year-old is as convincing as the cinderblock and chicken wire World Trade Center reenactment.
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You reprobates wanted to raise your daughters to be "sex workers". What did you think was going to happen?
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Why is this woman broadcasting her daughter's condition to strangers on the internet? :hammer:
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Why is this woman broadcasting her daughter's condition to strangers on the internet?
There is no daughter, and it most likely isn't a woman.
It's a really stupid troll trying to entice the DUmmies into embarrassing themselves.
They really can put things on the internet that aren't true, you know.
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Talented?
It's such a weak, transparent effort at trolling even the halfwitted DUmpmonkeys, who need a sign to recognize sarcasm, saw through it almost immediately.
Just think how bad a troll it is that can't even deceive a DUmmy.
This tale of the twelve-year-old is as convincing as the cinderblock and chicken wire World Trade Center reenactment.
When I say talented I'm speaking of the writing style not the content.
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Has any of our moles, that deceive better that MichelleB, checked to see if she was TSed yet?
If by some small chance that the DUmmy is on the up and up, isn't it their desire to see 12 YOs have or not have an abortion without the parents knowledge?
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Liberal family values.
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Warpy (68,160 posts)
52. Wrong, it's her body and this is not life threatening
although it's risky--at any age.
Besides, my bullshit meter is pinned.
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If by some small chance that the DUmmy is on the up and up, isn't it their desire to see 12 YOs have or not have an abortion without the parents knowledge?
It is if you're Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
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It is if you're Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
Bingo.
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TeeYiYi
12 year old daughter knocked up
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Advises abortion
Mother of the year
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Now wait just a second. The DUmmies constantly tell us that abortion is only the business of the woman, or girl if they want one. So wouldn't they be hypocrites for not wanting to allow this girl to exercise her "choice" by not aborting? If the parents aren't allowed to stop an abortion then why should they be allowed to force one? So much for the pro choice stance, they are pro abortion and this further proves that they are.
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There is no daughter, and it most likely isn't a woman.
It's a really stupid troll trying to entice the DUmmies into embarrassing themselves.
They really can put things on the internet that aren't true, you know.
Bonjour :)
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Bonjour
It's "uhhhhh, bon jour". :-)
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I read as much of this as I can and I cannot find any mention of the father.
Do they ever get to it? Is the baby's father another kid or is this statutory rape?
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I read as much of this as I can and I cannot find any mention of the father.
Do they ever get to it? Is the baby's father another kid or is this statutory rape?
It was in there somewhere, he is 15.
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It's "uhhhhh, bon jour". :-)
I stand corrected. :hammer:
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It was in there somewhere, he is 15.
Thanks. I was worried there was a predator out there, real or moled up.
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I would be ashamed and emabarrassed if I had a twelve year old daughter, who was pregnant. I would consider and talk the best course of action, getting together with the father, his parents, and a legal mentor. Providing my daughter carries the full nine months, I would gently suggest putting the infant up for adoption, and the treason why, is so the daughter will always remember. If she had aborted, I feel that would send the wrong message, that she can use abortion as a method of birth control.
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I would be embarrassed to announce my 12 year old was pregnant. Please please please let this poster be a mole. PLEASE.
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Well, to liberals, kids are community property so when their kid is in trouble, it's everyone else's problem.
And what do you do when that is the case? Post for help on DU!
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Well, I happen to agree with you. She's way too young to make such decisions.
And this is her life you're talking about. She has no idea at such a young age. Perhaps you could talk to someone at Planned Parenthood or to a counselor to advise her. Certainly no one her own age can possibly have a clue. She's just a child, so can't be expected to understand, and it makes no sense that the boyfriend's parents can't realize that. We're not even talking about a teenager here. Since you are her medical proxy, and her parent and guardian, that should count for a lot. I'd still consult a lawyer and/or an experienced counselor, since it's not just a difference of opinion, but a child who needs help to make a decision that's in her own interest, which she's just not capable of at such a young age. I am so sorry that you're faced with this...
Strangely enough, I seem to recall the DUmp making the argument that a 12 year old IS old enough, mature enough, wise enough, to make the choice to abort. Now, how can it be that a kid can be old enough to choose murder, but not old enough to choose life? :???:
::) :banghead:
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Strangely enough, I seem to recall the DUmp making the argument that a 12 year old IS old enough, mature enough, wise enough, to make the choice to abort. Now, how can it be that a kid can be old enough to choose murder, but not old enough to choose life? :???:
::) :banghead:
What a mess, possibility's on both sides are a nightmare. What ever she chooses there are herself, the baby, the father, 4 grand parents whose lives will never be the same.
It would be oh so convenient to hog tie the 12 year old and force her to be operated on and sterilized .
Up until the late 70's one State in the south did this to girls considered "AT RISK" by the courts.
Dirty little secret was 99% of the young girls were Black.
This is very personal to me as I was told that I had to abort my 6 month pregnancy as the baby was shutting down both my kidneys. I refused and both sides of the family including the father made me feel that to indanger MY life for an unborn would be a crime against my other two children.
When my son was born both sides were all huffy that although born 6 weeks early he was smart and strongest one of my kids. Their guilt trips as they watched him grow and I recover caused great tension in the family. Every one of his achievements were like a slap in the face to them.
Never know how things will turn out, never know how people will react to advising one to do something and when advice not followed show what damn fools they are.
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thanks!! Unfortunately I haven't responded to enough links to start my own? Kinda odd. Anyway, in this situation, due to the whole patient privacy acts, I never had to be informed that she was pregnant. Yet because she went to planned parenthood, because I had scheduled the appointment, they contacted DCF and I know have them watching to make sure I make her go to all the appointments. Yet I don't have to be informed of them?? And when at the appointment, she had no idea WHAT a spectulm was or what it did. She was all for aborting until the boyfriend had something to say about it. He'd leave her. She was a murderer and everything else he could fill her head with. Doctors told her about her risks but she doesn't acknowledge. Yet, she didn't even know what the term bowel movement was!! Not that u would really expect a twelve year old too!! Yet.. Once again.. I get no say. I don't understand how that works. But god forbid she's not making the appointments!! I'm held responsible!! Not to mention, I'm not in a good spot financially yet who will end up paying for it?? She can't. She is t even old enough to get welfare. So what to do??
Oh look...a liberal hurt themselves with their own rules meant to hide abortion from parents. No sympathy here...you gave your 12 year old those rights so they could get an abortion behind your back and now it bit you in the ass.
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I did too until I noticed the spelling. I figure it's either a true DUer or a very talented mole.
Agreed...based on how she talks and the spelling, I'm thinking mom was still in the technical 'teen' years when she had her.
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Now wait just a second. The DUmmies constantly tell us that abortion is only the business of the woman, or girl if they want one. So wouldn't they be hypocrites for not wanting to allow this girl to exercise her "choice" by not aborting? If the parents aren't allowed to stop an abortion then why should they be allowed to force one? So much for the pro choice stance, they are pro abortion and this further proves that they are.
Precisely, but they don't like it when their own rules bite them on their ample rear ends.
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I would be embarrassed to announce my 12 year old was pregnant. Please please please let this poster be a mole. PLEASE.
I'm pretty sure this is a mole - There is no way to respond to the OP's thread without it being the wrong answer. However, it is a tragedy of liberal indoctrination & policy if it isn't. So this is a lose-lose situation. Well crafted idea -but sadly for the probable mole, it was way too early to spring this on them. The mole should have built up massive street cred in the feminists group first.
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Warpy (68,160 posts)
52. Wrong, it's her body and this is not life threatening
although it's risky--at any age.
Besides, my bullshit meter is pinned.
Does this mean that Warpy is completely full of bullshit and can hold no more or that she detects bullshit? I guess with a DUmmie it could go either way, but based on their following of Dem politicians like lemmings I find their ability to detect bullshit unreliable.
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In hospitals, they suggest doing pregnancy tests on 9 year old girls when they are admitted.
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Thanks. I was worried there was a predator out there, real or moled up.
It doesn't matter. 12-year-olds cannot consent to sex. It's rape pure and simple. The boy needs to be castrated.
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Why is this woman broadcasting her daughter's condition to strangers on the internet? :hammer:
Probably a mole. A 12 year old cannot consent as it is a crime.
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Probably a mole. A 12 year old cannot consent as it is a crime.
That wouldn't stop Planned Parenthood from performing the abortion behind the parent's back and protecting the rapist.
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That wouldn't stop Planned Parenthood from performing the abortion behind the parent's back and protecting the rapist.
Exactly. X-ring. H5.
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Your child gets pneumonia, you give them penicillin. Broken arm, you have the break set with a cast. Pregnancy...you terminate the pregnancy.
Babies: They're like pnuemonia and broken arms.
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The parents need to be held responsible for child neglect if a 12 year old child is pregnant
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The parents need to be held responsible for child neglect if a 12 year old child is pregnant
Even though I don't disagre with you, a few decades ago, that would have made more sense than today. We are going on to our second generation after the onslaught atack on traditional family values by various portions of our government that are designed to undermine parents and their control over their children. The process needs to be reversed. Imposng such a measure right now would make the situation worse where parents are legally not able to assert more control over their children but are held responsible if the children become wrong-doers. That's effectively what he have right now except the children don't have to become wrong-doers. All that it takes to destroy a child and their family is one anonymous call to CPS by a spineless worm. We have to give control back to parents before we can expect them to have that level of accountability. Otherwise, one arm of the government will be holding parents responsible for bad behavior that was promoted (many times against the parent's knowledge or will) by another government agency.
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You pissed and moaned to get laws like this in place and now you want to cry about it?
Own it morons!
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You pissed and moaned to get laws like this in place and now you want to cry about it?
Own it morons!
Yes, it's funny how they start crying when the get what they want. Liberals are like 3-year old toddlers that are tired and/or hungry. No matter what you do for them, you can't make them happy. If you give them what they say that they want, they cry even louder. The toddler has an excuse for their behavior, the Liberals don't but they still act that way.
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You pissed and moaned to get laws like this in place and now you want to cry about it?
Own it morons!
They are a just bunch of whiny crybabies.