The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: franksolich on January 25, 2013, 08:26:21 AM
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Time for some Friday morning fun, heading into the weekend.
It's colder than Svalbaard in January here in the Sandhills.
Omaha Steve recently announced he was going to have an operation, but without providing specifics.
The good news about that is that it'll require some rest at home for a while, giving him time to hang around Skins's island, providing the DUmpster with fresh inventory, which'll keep nadin, BillBoobs, and the Bostonian Drunkard from dominating the market, growing old and stale and unsellable.
Variety's good.
I've listed reasonable and credible operations the big guy might be undergoing, but since it's all speculative, one has five votes, not just one.
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Does one of those describe cranial rectal seperation?
He probably wouldn`t do that though.
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Does one of those describe cranial rectal seperation?
He probably wouldn`t do that though.
By the way, one can change one's votes.
And this poll involves what sort of operation one supposes the big guy's going to have, not what sort of operation he really needs, which is either stomach reduction or wired jaws. If he doesn't get that weight down, any other sort of operation would be pretty much pointless.
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I voted for ..... haemorrhoidectomy.....he'll still be a pain in the ass.
He really needs them all.....a complete overhaul.
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I'm sticking with my initial supposition; hair transfer. Lobotomy is favored, however.
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I'm sticking with my initial supposition; hair transfer. Lobotomy is favored, however.
I knew a woman that had a lobotomy for depression.....talk about being crazy.....sheeesh.....the world was better off with her depressed.
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I went with the most-likely speculations:
shoulder repair
the back, spinal column
heart, cardiac
haemorrhoidectomy
removal of blockage in intestine
I'll bet the farm it's one of those.
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Maybe he's having his stomach stapled.
Couldn't hurt.
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Maybe he's having his stomach stapled.
Couldn't hurt.
Absolutely. That's what the big guy should have.
But primitives don't think logically and rationally about such things (or any things).
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I think it's for roids. Anything else, he would have made it public, fishing for sympathy.
Take a moment and just imagine if it was a sex change operation.
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I'm voting shoulder / Rotator Cuff surgery.
Its a favorite among unionistas
its not particularly invasive, and has damn near a 100% survival rate AND since there is little chance of ever recovering full motion afterward (85% is about as good as it gets) the patient ends up on the SSD fast-track.
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I voted for the webbed feet.
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I voted for the webbed feet.
He is keeping those -
Its how he paddles through the sewers
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Why would he get another lobotomy?
:???:
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They're full of shit. So I voted removal of blockage in intestine..... :popcorn:
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They're full of shit. So I voted removal of blockage in intestine..... :popcorn:
I like your style. H5.
I voted for shoulder repair, unkink back, nose job, gall bladder out, and other orthopedic. The first two coupled with the last could all be a result of that car accident (Hell, even the nose job). The gall bladder would fit his size (body mass).
I think that the lack of description of the procedure means that it's either 1) His fault about the car crash, if they're connected, or 2) Not covered by his insurance. Let's face it--if someone else was paying for it, don't you think that he'd be at least willing to describe what the insurance company/other driver was paying for?
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Removal of blockage - probably a small chinaman
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removal of blockage in intestine-I figured it is probably half a dozen of undigested mini-tacos that just will not pass.
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I'm voting shoulder / Rotator Cuff surgery.
Its a favorite among unionistas
its not particularly invasive, and has damn near a 100% survival rate AND since there is little chance of ever recovering full motion afterward (85% is about as good as it gets) the patient ends up on the SSD fast-track.
Damn. I had that done and went back to work. It never crossed my mind to get a SSD retirement. :argh:
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Brain transplant.
(http://new.fantasyflightgames.com/ffg_content/coc/news/coc-league-report/brain-transplant.jpg)
:-)
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When it comes to DUmmies, you need to understand that surgery to them is not the same as surgery to normal folk. Same with life threatening illness. Mrs Dawson is a prime example of DUmbass embellishment.
It is something so trivial that most people would raise an eyebrow if he mentioned it. Although I selected 5 possibilities, my real guess is that he's having a wart removed. It will need a single stitch afterwards.
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I said removal of an intestinal blockage.
He's having his head removed from his ass. :lmao:
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I said other. Marta's making him remove his nuts and she's sewing them in her purse permanently.
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I have no idea but I hope he is operated on by a doctor who had his/her grades based on social justice in medical school.
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After looking over all the choices, and keeping in mind the mental state of said place of hang out, I come to the conclusion that a sex change would give him some street cred with the bubble heads and allow him some bragging rights in the current environment.
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It's part of his gravy train campaign, aided by a union-sponsored quack.
Let's hope he has a freakish reaction to the anesthetic.
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Damn. I had that done and went back to work. It never crossed my mind to get a SSD retirement. :argh:
Id say that's because you aren't a primitive. I know of one other person who had that procedure, and a severe case of Lyme Disease who tried to go back to work but couldn't do her former job -and instead transferred to an office position. She stayed employed until her actual retirement date and didn't get out early.
Everyone else I know who had that procedure done hopped right aboard the Gravy Train.
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I have no idea but I hope he is operated on by a doctor who had his/her grades based on social justice in medical school.
Yep.
The surgeon will be the smartest minority, not the smartest student, in his graduating class. Who says affirmative action isn't a good thing?
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I said removal of an intestinal blockage.
He's having his head removed from his ass. :lmao:
What a waste of Obamabucks. It'll be lodged squarely back in his colon again before he leaves the hospital. That kind of stupid you just can't fix surgically.
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Whatever it is, someone else is paying for it. I went with stomach stapling.
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Yep.
The surgeon will be the smartest minority, not the smartest student, in his graduating class. Who says affirmative action isn't a good thing?
Michael Jackson.
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Sex change. Maybe he'll finally become a man.
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Sex change. Maybe he'll finally become a man.
He daughter out of wedlock looks like it was born a man. It would give most men a run for their money.
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He'll have to get a new wardrobe.
(http://i237.photobucket.com/albums/ff68/kayaktn/circumcision_sm.jpg)
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Tear duct treatment.
Signs and symptoms may be caused by the blocked tear duct or from an infection that develops because of the blockage. Look for:
Excessive tearing
Watery eyes
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/blocked-tear-duct/DS01096/DSECTION=symptoms
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Tear duct treatment.
Damn.
When considering all of the big guy's possible afflictions, of which severe gross obesity is the most major one, I'd forgotten all about his lachrymoreal tendencies.
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Damn.
When considering all of the big guy's possible afflictions, of which severe gross obesity is the most major one, I'd forgotten all about his lachrymoreal tendencies.
Body fat produces excess estrogen in men.
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Body fat produces excess estrogen in men.
That explains man-boobs.
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I went with other since he has posted about having neck problems.
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I am sure workman's comp is paying for it, even though it did not happen on the job.
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I'd bet that it's a minor surgery to fix an imaginary back/shoulder problem. He just wants to keep the gravy train rolling.
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I voted for "hair removal and transfer". I suspect Steve's having plugs of hair removed from his butt to fortify his neckbeard.