The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: Freeper on January 19, 2013, 11:44:19 AM
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Read this with caution Cavers he just may convert you with his brilliance. If you think you don't have a strong enough mind to not be convinced then please hit the back button now.
Seriously take caution if you choose to read this.
Okay you have a strong enough mind to not fall for this absolutely brilliant argument if you scrolled down this far. Ready?
gulliver (8,375 posts)
Winning over Republicans with the Seven Deadly Sins
An easy trick to remember when trying to persuade Republicans (who may also hide under the name "conservatives") of anything is to pepper your argument with appeals to the Seven Deadly Sins: wrath, greed, laziness, pride, lust, gluttony, and envy. Try it. It's fun.
Here is an example. Let's say you want to turn a Republican against mountaintop mining. And let's say you personally care about natural beauty, animal and fish habitat, and the health of residents who live along the rivers and streams near the mountaintops.
If you try to talk about those things directly with the Republican, you will fail. They have a completely different view of the mountaintops, fish, and people. The mountaintops have money under them. There are fish everywhere, so who cares about the fish near the mountaintops. And the people are people they don't know. Case closed. Blow up the mountain.
So instead, base your argument on sin.
(Greed and Envy) If we blow up that mountaintop, it will hurt our tourism. Other places nearby will get more of our rightful tourism dollars than they already are. (Envy) And you can just bet that all the money will end up in the pockets of bunch of fat cats in their mansions.
(Pride) We are better than that. We don't need that pittance of mining business like that other place or state we always tell jokes about. (Greed, Sloth/Laziness, and Anger) That mining company thinks it can take our resources and leave a mess for us to clean up later with our tax money. They've got another think coming.
(Lust) Besides, that area is a great place for parking. The view sets the perfect mood. (Gluttony) And I don't care if there are other places to park. You can't have too many.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10022219242
:rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf:
I will say one thing if he actually uses that on a repuke they will laugh their asses off at his brilliance.
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<---Still an evil Conservative.
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<---Still an evil Conservative.
Yeah you have to have a strong mind to not fall for that. Then again if anyone here doesn't have a strong mind they would be a liberal anyway. :-)
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That would only work on those with Lilliputian size brains, AKA DUmmies.
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There is hardly a DUmp thread that is not based on just about all 7 of them. ::)
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DUmp thinks it's stupid, too.
One reply to the fool.
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OMG! I am totally convinced!!! 1111eleventy111!!!! I hate all you fascist rethugs!
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gulliver (8,375 posts)
Winning over Republicans with the Seven Deadly Sins
An easy trick to remember when trying to persuade Republicans (who may also hide under the name "conservatives") of anything is to pepper your argument with appeals to the Seven Deadly Sins: wrath, greed, laziness, pride, lust, gluttony, and envy. Try it. It's fun.
Here is an example. Let's say you want to turn a Republican against mountaintop mining. And let's say you personally care about natural beauty, animal and fish habitat, and the health of residents who live along the rivers and streams near the mountaintops.
If you try to talk about those things directly with the Republican, you will fail. They have a completely different view of the mountaintops, fish, and people. The mountaintops have money under them. There are fish everywhere, so who cares about the fish near the mountaintops. And the people are people they don't know. Case closed. Blow up the mountain.
So instead, base your argument on sin.
(Greed and Envy) If we blow up that mountaintop, it will hurt our tourism. Other places nearby will get more of our rightful tourism dollars than they already are. (Envy) And you can just bet that all the money will end up in the pockets of bunch of fat cats in their mansions.
(Pride) We are better than that. We don't need that pittance of mining business like that other place or state we always tell jokes about. (Greed, Sloth/Laziness, and Anger) That mining company thinks it can take our resources and leave a mess for us to clean up later with our tax money. They've got another think coming.
(Lust) Besides, that area is a great place for parking. The view sets the perfect mood. (Gluttony) And I don't care if there are other places to park. You can't have too many.
This kind of works but not like the DUmmie claimed. In my duties as a fictional spirit-guide I came across a DUmmie just the other day that was against mining a specific mountain. Here was the conversation:
DUmmie Male: I'M AGAINST MINING IN THE MOUNTAIN!11!11!1
FlippyDoo: This is one time I've got to agree with you.
DUmmie Male: Um...You agree with me? You're against mining the mountain?
FlippyDoo: Yep. Against it 100%.
DUmmie Male: That's surprising. Why are you against it? Because of the destruction of animal habitat?
FlippyDoo: Nope. I'm against because tests shows that in addition to the main ore that they are after the mountain is also loaded with penisonium ore.
DUmmie Male: What is penisonium ore?
FlippyDoo: It's something new that was recently discovered. The powers that be are trying to keep it under wraps because it makes the worlds greatest homosexual anal toy. I don't know why, but they say it's something spectacular. Plus, for some reason once the penisonium is released from the mountain it causes spontaneous abortions within a 1 mile radius.
DUmmie Male: Are you serious?
FlippyDoo: Would a fictional spirit-guide lie to you?
DUmmie Male: MINE THAT MOUNTAIN!!!111!!!! MINE THAT MOUNTAIN NOW!!!!11111
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This kind of works but not like the DUmmie claimed. In my duties as a fictional spirit-guide I came across a DUmmie just the other day that was against mining a specific mountain. Here was the conversation:
DUmmie Male: I'M AGAINST MINING IN THE MOUNTAIN!11!11!1
FlippyDoo: This is one time I've got to agree with you.
DUmmie Male: Um...You agree with me? You're against mining the mountain?
FlippyDoo: Yep. Against it 100%.
DUmmie Male: That's surprising. Why are you against it? Because of the destruction of animal habitat?
FlippyDoo: Nope. I'm against because tests shows that in addition to the main ore that they are after the mountain is also loaded with penisonium ore.
DUmmie Male: What is penisonium ore?
FlippyDoo: It's something new that was recently discovered. The powers that be are trying to keep it under wraps because it makes the worlds greatest homosexual anal toy. I don't know why, but they say it's something spectacular. Plus, for some reason once the penisonium is released from the mountain it causes spontaneous abortions within a 1 mile radius.
DUmmie Male: Are you serious?
FlippyDoo: Would a fictional spirit-guide lie to you?
DUmmie Male: MINE THAT MOUNTAIN!!!111!!!! MINE THAT MOUNTAIN NOW!!!!11111
:rotf:
Not far from how that conversation would really go.