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Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: franksolich on October 04, 2012, 09:07:58 PM

Title: only the big guy could
Post by: franksolich on October 04, 2012, 09:07:58 PM
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10021472382

Oh my.

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Omaha Steve (33,299 posts)   Thu Oct 4, 2012, 07:03 PM

Only a Republican could...

Sorry if this is a dupe.

after which a silly decal

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Earth Bound Misfit (2,847 posts)   Thu Oct 4, 2012, 08:04 PM

1. K & R!

You're a good man OS, glad you're still on the DU.

The above's the whole thread.

In case the big guy missed it, I decided to augment this thread with a comment I posted earlier today, because Tucker here liked it:

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The property caretaker was here for a few minutes this morning, picking up some tools he needs for another job.

"Hey boss, I heard you scared a couple of them away last night."

I don't know how he could possibly know this, but I've been long convinced that hearing people pick up more information via mental telepathy or extra-sensory perception, than they do by actually hearing.

Yeah, I said; it must be a certain magnetism I have, that attracts random strangers.

Starting today, the house is going to be winterized--a long process--and when it's done, the place is about 50% less invasive-prone than it usually is.

- - - - - - - - - -

"The sheriff looked up that one big guy the cop in Omaha told him about.

"He said you're funnier than the big guy; he says the big guy's a pretty big loser."

I have no idea how the sheriff figured out who franksolich is, but whatever.

As the caretaker had a few minutes to spare, I told him more about the big guy.

"You see, he used to work for the waterworks in Omaha, and was always trying to find a free ride on some disability gravy train.

"He eventually hurt himself trying to crawl into a manhole half his circumference, and entertained thoughts of a big disability pay-off courtesy the hard-pressed taxpayers of Omaha.  The problem was, he didn't hurt himself enough.

"And so he was just transferred, to some lower-level clerical position with the police department in Omaha, that didn't require crawling through manholes.

"Now, none of his socialism tripe and union propaganda would get him fired--not even up here, where he'd just be looked at oddly, but nothing else--but upon learning he was being transferred to the police department instead of getting to lay in a hammock on the front porch all day long, while generous checks from the taxpayers flooded into his mailbox, he decided it'd be a good strategy to get fired from the police department.

"After which he could file some sort of six-figure lawsuit for 'wrongful dismissal,' and get his free ride.

"So he started posting all these articles supporting some mummified cop-killer in Philadelphia, hoping it'd piss off the Omaha cops, and get him fired, after which he could sue.

"But that never happened; about the most that's happened thus far is some cleaning lady during the middle of the night picked up a thumb-tack off the carpeting, and thinking she'd throw it away later, instead accidentally left it there on his chair."
Title: Re: only the big guy could
Post by: shadeaux on October 04, 2012, 09:57:15 PM
 :rotf:

I am laughing so hard !!
Title: Re: only the big guy could
Post by: 98ZJUSMC on October 04, 2012, 10:02:39 PM
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"But that never happened; about the most that's happened thus far is some cleaning lady during the middle of the night picked up a thumb-tack off the carpeting, and thinking she'd throw it away later, instead accidentally left it there on his chair."
:-)
Title: Re: only the big guy could
Post by: Airwolf on October 05, 2012, 05:36:36 PM
That's it? That's all hes got? That boy is about as sharp as a bowling ball. Sorry OS but your window licking days are going to long and the nights won't be any shorter. Your guys going back home and your free rides not coming either.
Title: Re: only the big guy could
Post by: BattleHymn on October 05, 2012, 05:51:38 PM
The Weeper is like the kid on the playground with the rubber-and-glue line.  Tired.  So tired. 


Speaking of tired, I'm getting tired of asking about his Dawes political sign, and when he is ever going to put that thing up for auction.  I figure I'll ask one more time, but throw a twist in there for him.

If you put up the sign for auction, I will refrain from making a large political donation to Mitt Romney, in your name.  Just consider the money I'd spend on the sign money that is not going to Mitt. 
Title: Re: only the big guy could
Post by: Skul on October 05, 2012, 06:21:53 PM
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Response to Omaha Steve (Original post)
Thu Oct 4, 2012, 08:04 PM
Earth Bound Misfit (2,862 posts)
1. K & R!

You're a good man OS, glad you're still on the DU.
Trust me on this, so are we, so are we.  :-)