The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: franksolich on September 13, 2012, 06:29:11 PM

Title: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: franksolich on September 13, 2012, 06:29:11 PM
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10021336816

Oh my.

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Stinky The Clown (47,309 posts)  Thu Sep 13, 2012, 03:38 PM

Could you be an undercover conservative? I couldn't.

I am hardwired to be a liberal. It is all I know. I can't even understand the conservative viewpoint. I have no doubt I could learn to imitate a conservative, but if I had to act conservative from a pure reflex action, I simply couldn't do it.

This is analogous to when I have driven in countries that drive on the left. I had no trouble sitting on the right side of the car to drive. I drove a stick and had no trouble adapting to shifting with my left hand. I had no trouble with roundabouts, except occasionally I've had to do an extra lap or two. My hardwired left hand drive ways became apparent when I was trying to back into traffic. Unless I was overly deliberate, I would often look the wrong way and back into the wrong lane. Being a pedestrian in right hand drive countries was even worse than driving. When you step off a curb, your instinct makes you look . . . . the wrong way! That speeding car in the curb lane is about to hit you in the *back* of the head. I am a left hand drive driver.

And so it is with conservatism. Intellectually, I can interpret it. I don't agree with most of it, but when I think about it, I can makes the words make some sense. I just can't believe it. Or even pretend to do so. I am a liberal.

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nadinbrzezinski (108,869 posts)  Thu Sep 13, 2012, 03:45 PM

2. I cover things like rallies and events and I cover them fairly, just as I cover the other side fairly.

As I told somebody on a story last Friday... "I am not fox news."

So if a conservative does something right, I will applaud them, if they do not, I will tell the story. The same goes for Dems.

Now I need to write down my notes in the puter, so I can understand my chicken scratch, or rather as I can still understand them.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: thundley4 on September 13, 2012, 06:32:00 PM
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nadinbrzezinski (108,869 posts)  Thu Sep 13, 2012, 03:45 PM

So if a conservative does something right, I will applaud them, if they do not, I will tell the story. The same goes for Dems.

However, in her slanted view, no conservative ever does anything right and no democratick ever does wrong.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: Freeper on September 13, 2012, 06:42:55 PM
Of course you don't understand conservatives, you believe the lies about how we are.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: BlueStateSaint on September 13, 2012, 07:01:32 PM
Allow me to calibrate my new DUmb**** translator a sec . . . Okay.

Okay . . .

Hmmm . . .

This is what it comes up with.

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Stinky The Clown (47,309 posts)  Thu Sep 13, 2012, 03:38 PM

:jerkit: :mental: :puke:
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: diesel driver on September 13, 2012, 07:07:36 PM
It's very simple, DUDE!

Conservatives can imitate liberals, and be more convincing at it, than a liberal could imitate a conservative.

It's because conservatives are SMARTER than liberals, and conservatives use their brains to THINK.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: Skul on September 13, 2012, 07:30:43 PM
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nadinbrzezinski (108,869 posts)  Thu Sep 13, 2012, 03:45 PM

2. I cover things like rallies and events and I cover them fairly, just as I cover the other side fairly.

As I told somebody on a story last Friday... "I am not fox news."

So if a conservative does something right, I will applaud them, if they do not, I will tell the story. The same goes for Dems.

Now I need to write down my notes in the puter, so I can understand my chicken scratch, or rather as I can still understand them.
Liar.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: FiddyBeowulf on September 13, 2012, 07:55:23 PM
Allow me to calibrate my new DUmb**** translator a sec . . . Okay.

Okay . . .

Hmmm . . .

This is what it comes up with.

Damn, mine must be broken. All it comes up with is:

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Stinky The Clown (47,309 posts)  Thu Sep 13, 2012, 03:38 PM
 :stoner: :stoner: :stoner: :stoner: :stoner: :stoner: :stoner:
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: freedumb2003 on September 13, 2012, 08:07:41 PM
This is like that Star Trek episode when they were on the doppleganger Enterprise.

Being civilized, the good Kirk could fake being evil.  The evil could not fake being good (in RL they can, but it is difficult).

Likewise liberals can't fake being conservative because dumb can't fake being smart.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: jukin on September 13, 2012, 08:13:08 PM
So being a liberal now means hating others with opposing viewpoints and wishing them dead?

Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: BigTex on September 13, 2012, 08:15:06 PM
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Now I need to write down my notes in the puter, so I can understand my chicken scratch, or rather as I can still understand them.

I guess her mom bought her a 'puter for Christmas
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: NHSparky on September 13, 2012, 08:16:22 PM
I could try to be a liberal, but I don't know if I'd like hitting myself in the head with a hammer that often.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: BigTex on September 13, 2012, 08:16:32 PM
This is like that Star Trek episode when they were on the doppleganger Enterprise.

Being civilized, the good Kirk could fake being evil.  The evil could not fake being good (in RL they can, but it is difficult).

Likewise liberals can't fake being conservative because dumb can't fake being smart.


Wasnt the good Kirk too much of a wuss to be an effective captain in that episode?
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: Carl on September 13, 2012, 08:23:00 PM
Pretending to be a liberal is easy,you just say crazy stuff.
Since DUmmies are for the most part clinically insane they simply can`t pretend otherwise.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: BlueStateSaint on September 14, 2012, 03:57:32 AM
Damn, mine must be broken. All it comes up with is:


You didn't apply Update 12CRAZY to it. ::) :thatsright:
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: Skul on September 14, 2012, 05:48:02 AM
The stinkDUde should seriously consider getting a new cat.
It appears the candy bars in the litterbox are starting to get funky.
StinkDUde, the mold on them is making you think crazy thoughts.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: freedumb2003 on September 14, 2012, 07:34:45 AM
Wasnt the good Kirk too much of a wuss to be an effective captain in that episode?

That was the one where he split into 2 Kirks.  The one I meant was they beamed into a parallel universe and evil Spock had a beard.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: Karin on September 14, 2012, 08:05:27 AM
So being a liberal now means hating others with opposing viewpoints and wishing them dead?

Yes, absolutely. 

I thought Stinky claimed to have a mole over here, where he is undercover, fooling us all, and gaining enough post count to access the secret compartments. 
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: franksolich on September 14, 2012, 08:09:06 AM
Yes, absolutely. 

I thought Stinky claimed to have a mole over here, where he is undercover, fooling us all, and gaining enough post count to access the secret compartments. 

The sparkling old dude does have an account here, but he's never used it.

Not at all, not even to lurk; he's never used it.

I dunno why, because we're nice people here, and the sparkling old dude's not the type to do something to get banned here (for bashing the military or revealing personal information), and so really, despite his stupid politics, he should be eminently comfortable amidst us.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: BigTex on September 14, 2012, 09:45:08 AM
That was the one where he split into 2 Kirks.  The one I meant was they beamed into a parallel universe and evil Spock had a beard.

Ahh, the bad Kirk tried and failed to pretend to be good in the episode where he was split also. Guess the writers didnt have many ideas back then.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: MoshMasterD on September 14, 2012, 04:13:51 PM
Just when you thought it can't get any funnier.....

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Great Caesars Ghost (229 posts)
17. Put me in a room full of conservatives....

View profile
is like putting a die hard KKK member at a Martin Luther King rally. I get violent tendencies, hell I will admit, I got in many a fistfights with conservatives, but my husband always finds a way to pull me back before things got more dangerously serious.
Title: Re: sparkling old dude is a liberal
Post by: Skul on September 14, 2012, 09:32:37 PM
Just when you thought it can't get any funnier.....

MoshM, I thought you were funnin' us.
You weren't. That idiot really did post that.  :lmao:
I'm at a loss for words only because I can't stop laughing.