The Conservative Cave

The Bar => The Lounge => Topic started by: bijou on August 08, 2012, 04:13:36 PM

Title: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: bijou on August 08, 2012, 04:13:36 PM
Quote
Rock Island police arrested a man found naked and covered in cooking spray early Monday in the downtown area.

Officers responded to the call of a naked man at

3:27 a.m. in the 2200 block of 3rd Avenue, where they found him carrying a pair of shorts.

Rock Island Deputy Chief of Police Jeff VenHuizen said the man, Chad William Forber, 41, of Blue Grass, told officers he had taken off his shorts because they were too big and would not stay on. ...
link (http://qctimes.com/news/local/crime-and-courts/ri-police-arrest-man-found-naked-and-covered-in-crisco/article_49279f1c-e105-11e1-b99f-0019bb2963f4.html)

Good job they caught him before he slipped away.
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: JohnnyReb on August 08, 2012, 04:18:24 PM
Apparently he was only half baked... :-)
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: njpines on August 08, 2012, 04:24:58 PM
Good grief, another arrest in the naked city!
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Undies on August 08, 2012, 04:27:05 PM
I hope they fry his ass.
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: debk on August 08, 2012, 05:38:18 PM
Oh Thank God!!


For once it wasn't some idiot from Tennessee!!!


Bet he was a hit in the jail showers.....
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Bad Dog on August 08, 2012, 05:41:55 PM
Must'a been like the pig wrestling event at the rodeo.
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: RobJohnson on August 08, 2012, 07:03:10 PM
He was from Iowa!
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: RobJohnson on August 08, 2012, 07:13:04 PM
The article comments are pretty funny....

Quote
Crisco from a can?!?! Show some class! Everybody knows that you lather yourself in lard to party!
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: obumazombie on August 08, 2012, 08:46:42 PM
He had been assaulted and battered.
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: vesta111 on August 09, 2012, 10:31:48 AM
ALERT,ALERT

Rumors going around around say the Muslim manufactures of clothing have found a way to alter the clothing so anyone that drinks alcohol will feel a need to get rid of them.

So far we only have two victims of the clothing, a well known singer and a unknown male that to stop the itching had to resort to Crisco.

Stay tuned as this may in fact sweep the country.   Who will be next,  Were these two men the first to bring to light a Terrorist plot  to bring in the laws of Islam  ?????
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: CG6468 on August 09, 2012, 10:40:44 AM
It was a religious thing. He is a friar.
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Undies on August 09, 2012, 10:43:18 AM
It was a religious thing. He is a friar.

You need to be punished.
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Eupher on August 09, 2012, 11:28:22 AM
Ester! Is that you, honey?
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Gina on August 09, 2012, 11:28:57 AM
What a lardass
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: CG6468 on August 09, 2012, 11:53:46 AM
You need to be punished.

Yes, I know.

Thank you!  :-)
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: vesta111 on August 09, 2012, 12:08:13 PM
What a lardass

Gina, how old was this man, the one with the Crisco ????

You are too young to remember the 1960 - 1980 when Swingers covered the rugs with plastic and had Crisco or Evoo party's,---------  Then there were the Jello parties in the cold Hot tubs, not good to try at home, to messy.

Looking through the search on my PC I have found some odd uses for Crisco, it was used for years in place of cold cream to remove make up from performers faces.   Used in the 30 ies for a photo shoot to show a gleaming healthy body shot.  

Seems at one time women before the conditioner came out would spread this in their hair for an hour or two then wash it.

Crisco was at one time pure, now they have added crap to make butter flavored stuff. If they make it bacon flavored then the old Crisco party's would come back.

Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Undies on August 09, 2012, 12:10:14 PM
Gina, how old was this man, the one with the Crisco ????

You are too young to remember the 1960 - 1980 when Swingers covered the rugs with plastic and had Crisco or Evoo party's,---------  Then there were the Jello parties in the cold Hot tubs, not good to try at home, to messy.

Looking through the search on my PC I have found some odd uses for Crisco, it was used for years in place of cold cream to remove make up from performers faces.   Used in the 30 ies for a photo shoot to show a gleaming healthy body shot.  

Seems at one time women before the conditioner came out would spread this in their hair for an hour or two then wash it.

Crisco was at one time pure, now they have added crap to make butter flavored stuff. If they make it bacon flavored then the old Crisco party's would come back.



Does penicillin even work for you anymore?
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Eupher on August 09, 2012, 12:11:56 PM
Does penicillin even work for you anymore?

She's a carrier and harbors the virus deep, deep inside of her.
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: vesta111 on August 09, 2012, 12:24:32 PM
Does penicillin even work for you anymore?

 Oh crap I am allergic to penicilien,  have been as a child.     

Are you thinking I have crotch rot ?????  :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Eupher on August 09, 2012, 02:32:19 PM
Oh crap I am allergic to penicilien,  have been as a child.     

Are you thinking I have crotch rot ?????  :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

Brain herpes. It's incurable. And you have it bad -- real bad.
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: njpines on August 09, 2012, 02:34:19 PM
Brain herpes. It's incurable. And you have it bad -- real bad.

Oh hell!  :lol:
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Wineslob on August 09, 2012, 04:17:58 PM
You need to be punished.


 :rofl:
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Wineslob on August 09, 2012, 04:19:30 PM
Oh crap I am allergic to penicilien,  have been as a child.     

Are you thinking I have crotch rot ?????  :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:



Na...............crickets.
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: CactusCarlos on August 09, 2012, 04:21:53 PM
Does penicillin even work for you anymore?

 :rotf: :rotf: :rotf:

H5

(so glad you're back!)
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: RobJohnson on August 09, 2012, 04:41:48 PM
He had been assaulted and battered.

 :lmao:
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Big Dog on August 09, 2012, 11:24:55 PM
No, no, no. He was supposed to use lard.

Everyone knows that Crisco is shortening!

Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: RobJohnson on August 10, 2012, 04:45:26 AM
Does penicillin even work for you anymore?

 :cheersmate:
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Big Dog on August 10, 2012, 07:29:13 AM
Read the entire story. It looks like someone has been reading Omaha Steve!
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: obumazombie on August 10, 2012, 08:54:29 AM
Read the entire story. It looks like someone has been reading Omaha Steve!
With a crisco neckbeard ?
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: JohnnyReb on August 12, 2012, 06:34:48 AM


Na...............crickets.

:lmao:Bloomer crickets...never had them but if you have them, can you fish with'em.
Title: Re: Police arrest man found naked and covered in Crisco
Post by: Freeper on August 12, 2012, 03:10:32 PM
It was a religious thing. He is a friar.

 :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf:
Verry Punny.