The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: USA4ME on June 13, 2012, 02:51:17 PM
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trumad (31,862 posts)
I could have got my ass shot the other day....
And I do believe if the woman had a gun, I may have...
Story:
I stopped at my local bank to get money out of the walk up ATM. There was a young lady in front of me doing the same.---kind of cute I might add.
She finished her business, and then it was my turn at the ATM.
I finished and walked back to my car as I counted my money.
I have a black Infinity G35.
So--- I open the door to get in--- and there is the young lady sitting in the drivers seat.
She let out a scream straight from the scariest horror flick you've ever seen.
I let out a scream---but not quite as bad...... dude scream
Both of us just staring at each other not knowing what the hell was going on----until..... I realized, it wasn't my car.
She had a black BMW--- very close looking to my car---OK---not that close...but close enough.
I was so caught up in counting my money from the ATM, I didn't notice I walked up to the wrong car.
I quickly and repeatedly starting apologizing to this poor Lady---pointing at my car and saying----see, our cars look alike.
No matter----the terrified look on her face would not dissipate. The incident clearly scared her to death. She didn't laugh and blow it off---smile---she didn't even speak one word.
I got in my car (the right car)...looked over and watched her drive off...and noticed that instead of taking the turn she wanted---it was blocked by other cars...she went the other way just to get out of dodge.
Here's the thing--- I truly believe that if this lady had a gun in her purse or near by---she may have used it because she was that terrified.
I could not imagine if that happen and she put a hole right in my head.... what would the hell would my family have thought? Hopefully a great detective would have figured out I had a brain fart.
This is a story of why a gun would have been good but could have been bad.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002804178
Unfortunately she wasn't armed.
And if she had "put a hole right in my head," what's the chance the bullet would have hit his pea-sized brain anyway? Likely wouldn't have hit anything at all.
Also note he says he "could have got his ass shot" and then relates that to "put a hole in his head," confirming that his ass and his head are really the same thing.
BTW, a great detective isn't needed to know you daily have brain farts, primitive.
Oh well, better luck next time.
.
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I once walked down the street in Miami.
I could have been shot.
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What kind of moron confuses a BMW with a G35? :bs:
:bouncy:
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I once walked down the street in Miami.
I could have been shot.
Or eaten.
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Gotta keep your wits about you in a city, Trumad.
I did this before. I walked out of the store, climbed into the waiting truck, babbling about one thing or another, "you wouldn't believe the line, what a pain in the ass...blah blah blah." I turned to look at my husband, and there was a strange man sitting there. He was smirking. I burst out laughing and apologized profusely.
You know, I'd always imagined Trumud as a woman.
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What kind of moron confuses a BMW with a G35? :bs:
:bouncy:
He was pulling a Pam.
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I was so caught up in counting my money from the ATM, I didn't notice I walked up to the wrong car.
Really? You took that much cash out and it took that long to count it? Then again, the DUmmie probably scared the girl from the start by standing behind her at the ATM. Common courtesy would require standing back from a person using an ATM.
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He was pulling a Pam.
Yeah. "Oh, I have so much money in the bank I just can't count all of it. Lawdy, lawdy."
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Yeah. "Oh, I have so much money in the bank I just can't count all of it. Lawdy, lawdy."
And "I drive a G35".
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One time I was tipping back in my chair and went too far.
I caught myself at the last moment but my heart was pounding.
I could have died.
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One time I drank milk past its expiration date.
I could have died.
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Last week I crossed the street before the cross walk sign told me to.
I could have died.
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One time I had a stroke.
I could have died.
I had to edit, damn iPad. <===== look I pulled a Pam too!
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One time I came out of the bathroom without washing my hands.
I could have died.
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Yeah...I can see this stud with his pimp suit and GMoney bling swaying back and forth.
Strutting back to his Infinity...licking his thumb and scraping off 20s, so engrossed in the exercise that not only does he go to the wrong parking spot but gets into the wrong car. I hope he gets ice on that thumb.
What I don't understand is why does he feel the need to rub his wealth in the faces of the poor desparate 99% that inhabits the island? :???:
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Hassin Bin Sober
8. Or worse yet, she coulda shot you in the balls.
She can't shoot what the trulymad primitive ain't got, idiot.
.
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I farted at work once.
Everyone else could have died.
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I once laughed so hard milk came out of my nose.
But I wasn't drinking milk at the time.
I could have died!
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NightWatcher
4. ooh la la, and Infiniti g35 AND money in the bank...
you deserved whatever you would have gotten. Kidding, but you should be more careful and aware of your surroundings and vehicle around an ATM.
Weird things happen, daily. Its all about judgement calls.
trumad (31,862 posts)
9. Total duh moment for sure.
the G35 is old---the money tight.
Car old? Money tight? Must be that hopey-changy thing working its magic......... still.
.
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trumad (31,862 posts)
9. Total duh moment for sure.
the G35 is old---the money tight.
Tight money, but he needed so long to count it he tried couldn't pay attention and tried to carjack a chick? :bs:
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I once made a midnight sandwhich with roast beef, pastrami, pravalone, lettuce, tomato and onions.
But then I realized I was out of Miracle Whip.
I could have died.
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My mom drove me to the mall in her mini-van and dropped me off right in front of my friends.
I could have died.
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9. Total duh moment for sure.
the G35 is old---the money tight.
Yeah, gotta walk it back...he's taking friendly fire.
13. Dear, wait until you get into your car to count your money, Einstein.
It make you a target of muggers if you are flashing cash around. Didn't your mother teach you anything?
Glad you're not dead.
Heh...the return fire is growing in amount and becoming more acurate.
trumad (31,862 posts)
17. This was broad daylight---in a very busy parking lot.
i had literally 20 steps to my car from the ATM.
If I get mugged in that situation--- well geez...
FALLBACK!!!
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Tight money, but he needed so long to count it he tried couldn't pay attention and tried to carjack a chick? :bs:
When he's walking and unable to take off his shoes, I could see the trulymad primitive having difficulty counting $11.
.
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trumad (31,862 posts)
17. This was broad daylight---in a very busy parking lot.
i had literally 20 steps to my car from the ATM.
If I get mugged in that situation--- well geez...
And you STILL got in the wrong car.
You're too stupid to have money. You should give it away.
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The oldest G35 is a 2003 model. Car and Driver's test car was a few bills under $30k and Kelly Blue Book says used models in good condition are worth $12-15,000 today.
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trumad (31,862 posts)
22. I had a valet bring up the wrong car...
He brought a newer Infinity--mine is a 2008---he brought up a 2011---not much difference---both Black.My wife and I both got in and quickly realized---hey this is new.
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Response to trumad (Original post)
Wed Jun 13, 2012, 01:20 PM
countryjake (4,042 posts)
19. You really are getting old, Trumad.
And I'm glad that woman wasn't carrying.
:lmao: Keep rubbing it in tough guy, your doing a great job of making friends!
A little salt please.
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I once to the cover off of an electrical outlet using a butter knife.
I could have died.
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I once ate Miracle Whip instead of Hellmans
I could have died!
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I once knew a man from Nantucket . . .
I could have died!!
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trumad (31,862 posts)
22. I had a valet bring up the wrong car...
:overreaction:
[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_v1onUZ8r8[/youtube]
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MineralMan (44,409 posts)
37. Paying attention to what you're doing will prevent
situations like this. You didn't park in that spot. It was a different make of car. You weren't paying attention to what you were doing. As you say, you're lucky she wasn't armed and didn't have some pepper spray or a taser, either. Paying attention prevents many things.
Get your head down Trudumbass, incoming.
As a side note why do so many DUmbasses get into other peoples cars by accident...I've never done that.
On second thought, was really an accident??? :confused:
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I laughed with a mouth full of half-chewed crackers and inhaled some crumbs.
I could have died.
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I'm laughing so hard at this thread . . .
I could have died!
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I'm laughing so hard at this thread . . .
I could have died!
Winnar!
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truman thinks all black cars look alike.
:racist:
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This thread is crying out for the Earl Butz line: "I'll tell you what the coloreds want. It's three things: first, a tight pu$$y; second, loose shoes; and third, a warm place to $hit.". Ah the good old days, Nixon, Ford, Archie Bunker. Those were the days :tongue:
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I wonder how much of Trumad's post is true.
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I'm laughing so hard at this thread . . .
I could have died!
I was laughing so hard at this comment that my cat was glaring at me...
I could have died!
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I just went to the bathroom and almost fell into the toilet.
I almost died.
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MineralMan (44,410 posts)
37. Paying attention to what you're doing will prevent
situations like this. You didn't park in that spot. It was a different make of car. You weren't paying attention to what you were doing. As you say, you're lucky she wasn't armed and didn't have some pepper spray or a taser, either. Paying attention prevents many things.
:whatever: What a finger-wagging putz!
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I was once shot in the ass with a BB gun.
It could have broken the skin and caused a very bad infection.
(http://sidesalad.net/archives/ChevyChaseJohnCandyVacationRollercoasterBBGun.JPG)
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trumad (31,862 posts)
22. I had a valet bring up the wrong car...
(http://chzmemeanimals.files.wordpress.com/2012/01/advice-animals-memes-first-world-cat-problems-keyboard.jpg)
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:overreaction:
[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_v1onUZ8r8[/youtube]
:rotf: :rotf:
And then there was the Caddilac Cimmaron. Darn near killed name plate.
Cimarron, by Cadillac"
by That Car Guy on February 09, 2009
Look! Up in the sky! It's Sunbird! It's too plain! No, it's Cimarron! (Roll theme music)
On May 21, 1981, one of the biggest "You've got to be kidding me!" moves in automotive history was made when General Motors' Cadillac Division rolled out this generic economy car to an unenthusiastic, not-so gullible press corps and public. Essentially a rebodied Chevrolet Cavalier, even today the Cimarron evinces grimaces from Cadillac faithful.
(http://thatcarguy.typepad.com/.a/6a0105355ab3fc970b01053704b745970c-320wi)
{snip}
http://www.carlustblog.com/2009/02/cimarron-by-cadillac-19811988.html
:jacked2:
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trumad (31,862 posts)
22. I had a valet bring up the wrong car...
[
I could be wrong about this due to the fact I've never used valet parking but if I understand it correctly when you turn your keys over to the person that parks your car you recieve a ticket.
Once you are done dining you go out and hand that ticket over to the valet service, they use that to identify the car to bring down.
The statement "I had a valet bring down the wrong car" seems to indicate that he has no idea how this service actually works.
If what he indicates is true I'ma goin to Ruth Chris tonight and get me a corvette.
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If what he indicates is true I'ma goin to Ruth Chris tonight and get me a corvette.
:thumbs: That sounds like a plan.
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Once I went swimming within 30 minutes of eating.
I could have died.
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So DUmmie Trulymad mistakes his rebadged Nissan Skyline for a true BMW. Only a total brain dead, 100% pure, concentrated, nothing added, no fillers or preservatives.DUMBASS could have done that!
He should have been dead, before birth.
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I once ran with scissors AND had a lollipop in my mouth while going outside with wet hair . . .
I could have died!
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Sometimes I don't let sleeping dogs lie.
I could have died.
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I once went outside during a thunderstorm with a metal handled umbella.
I could have died.
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Ok, that campfire seems to be burning out...Maybe they are on to the hilarity, hopefully there are still embers glowing...I give it 1 bong just for the funnayism.
I also think it should be kept in mind for the DOTY, still time to go but dayum!
I could have died laughing!
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MINERAL MAN!!!! Master of the obvious.
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I once removed the mattress tag that said "Do Not Remove".
I could have died.
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I once ate a cookie before dinner and ruined my appetite.
I could have died!
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I used to ride my bicycle without a bike helmet.
I could have died.
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Why is the DUmmy driving an Infiniti G35 rather than a car made in Detroit by union members? Where is Omaha Steve-Nad to chastise him for hating Americans? I betcha he's a closet WalMart shopper and FOXNews watcher as well.
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I once poked my brother deliberately while in the car on vacation.
ONCE!
I could have died.
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I touched a light switch with wet hands.
I could have died.
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I used deodorant and antiperspirant on the same armpit on the same day.
I could have died.
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I used to own a set of lawn darts.
I could have died.
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Told my girlfriend how she really looked in that dress...
I'm going to die.
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I went for a walk while chewing bubble gum at the same time.
I could have died.
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I jumped on a trampoline with no pads or "cage".
I could have died.
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I once drank a 20 oz. soda and had a large tub of popcorn at the movies.
I could have died.
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I once ate pop rocks and drank a coke at the same time.
I could have died.
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I use power tools that are so old, they don't have warning labels on them.
I could die.
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I drank unpasteurized milk
I could have died.
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I went into a building thru the doors that said "DO NOT ENTER"!
I could have died.
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I was at a party where one of the guests double dipped his potato chips.
I could have died.
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I once brought my own lunch to school instead of eating the Moochelle-approved govt sponsored school lunch.
I could have died.
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OK, you people are just being silly now!
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I once didn't finish all the peas on my plate.
All the kids in China could have died!
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I've eaten uninspected, unprocessed, and ungraded meat products.
I could have died.
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OK, you people are just being silly now!
Yes, we are! :lmao:
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I eat meat.
I will die.
But I will be happy!
:-)
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I've talked on the telephone during a thunderstorm.
I could have died.
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I sometimes eat biscuits with gravy and eggs for breakfast.
I could die.
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(http://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/600417_10151849014530604_1266547463_n.jpg)
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I like my steaks medium rare.
I could die.
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I'm surprised that no one has said the obvious:
I once stood between a box of non-radioactive milk and a pretentious pretend reporter with a 10" knife and a good rig.
I could have died.
OR I once stood between a democrat and someone else's money.
I could have died.
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I once took a drink of coke and there was a fly in it.
I could have died.
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OR I once stood between a democrat and someone else's money.
I could have died.
Good one; awesome.
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I once stood between Michael Moore and a buffet.
I could have died.
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I once wore brown shoes with black pants.
I could have died.
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This thread is crying out for the Earl Butz line: "I'll tell you what the coloreds want. It's three things: first, a tight pu$$y; second, loose shoes; and third, a warm place to $hit.". Ah the good old days, Nixon, Ford, Archie Bunker. Those were the days :tongue:
Yup but you forgot a mate that cooks. Universal for all men of any race.
My question is why this person did not count his money as soon as he got it ?? I have never used an AMT machine, what to do if the darn thing malfunctions, how long must one wait to get the money owed.
Good old days of getting money at bank or change in stores are gone. Change and money counted out to the penny.
Drive through made a -$50.00 error and I did not count my money until I got home. You know the money in an envelope thing with impatient cars behind you and no place to pull over to park and count the money. Never did that again, took me almost a month to get my money so I go inside the bank and watch the teller count out the cash.
Being shot is the least of all the bad things that could have happend to this idiot. He really set him self up. Had the woman been an old lady and a Cop around, a scream and a heart attack-----He was behind her in line and followed her to her car, Yanked open the door of her car. Allot of explaining to do.
Or, as he mentioned he was checking her out. This young woman may have " felt" this and when he came to her car and opened the door, she thinking she was to be car jacked and robbed could have had an Asthma attack, crapped her pants or if on drugs had a paranoid attack.
Actually he violated the number one rule of security, never get in a car until you check the back seat. Had he done so he would have seen her in the front.
This man must be a head banger, he has never listened to C&W-----Never count your money when your sitting at the table.
This poster is a complete idiot, I hope next time he is arrested for terrorising due to stupidity. But this must explain why so many people drive about with their dog in the car.
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When I was on the playground a girl with cooties kissed me.
I could have died.
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I once wore brown shoes with black pants.
I could have died.
Yeah, those fashion police are trigger happy.
Shoot first, accessorize later.
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I once knew a guy who tried to get an honest day's work out of Omaha Steve.
That guy almost died.
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I was dead.
I got better.
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Dammit!! if I have to stop this car----
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Dammit!! if I have to stop this car----
You could die.
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I was dead.
I got better.
:lol: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf:
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I actually read Vesta post.
I could have died.
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I actually read Vesta post.
I could have died.
:lol: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf: :rotf:
I AM dying!!!!
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My mom drove me to the mall in her mini-van and dropped me off right in front of my friends.
I could have died.
:lmao: you are killing me.... I could have died..
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I once stood between Schmuck Schumer and a camera.
I could have died.
(This is fun!) :-)
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I hooked the hot water up instead of the cold water to the bathtup by accident.
I could have died.
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I didn't stand between a drunk Randi Rhodes and a flight of stairs.
She almost died.
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I didn't have a quarter for the airport bathroom.
I could have died.
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I once stood between Schmuck Schumer and a camera.
I could have died.
(This is fun!) :-)
I came between Joe Biden and a thought.
It died instead.
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I used to ride in cars with out wearing a seat belt.
I coulda died.
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I used to have a dream about finding Happiness and True Love.
It died.
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I used to sit too close to the TV.
I could have died, or gone blind.
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I used to live in a somewhat free country.
It is dying a slow painful death.
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There is going to be Hell to pay when your dad gets home!!
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Hugo Chavez has cancer.
He's dying.
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My hair is almost completely gray, making me look older than I am.
..I could have dyed...
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i tripped over my shoelaces.
I should have tied.
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takes too long going down these stairs.
I should slide.
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Going out with wet hair gave me an earache.
I shoulda dried..
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Jimmy cracked corn, I didn't care...
I could have died...
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Tried to say The Pledge of Allegience in a public high school.
I got pie-ed.
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...I keep reading this thread.
I am dying!
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I baked a whole chicken in the oven.
I could have fried.
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:lmao: you guys are the best. :)
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Do you folkes think that Trumad has seen this thread?
It would be a shame if he didn't, life is too short, one has to have some fun.
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Obama said he was going to fix the economy.
He lied.
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Obama said he was going to fix the economy.
He lied.
You wrote a winner.
You get high-fived!!
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Zimmerman shot a thug.
He will be tried.
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Zimmerman shot a thug.
He will be tried.
Let's pray he's not fried.
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Drank a bottle of whiskey.
I got ryed.
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Drank a bottle of whiskey.
I got ryed.
Singing this will be the day that I die.
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Let's pray he's not fried.
About his finances he lied.
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When I could still see, I used to sit too close to the television. I went blind, but not from that.
I wanted to die, so I stepped into quicksand right before an unforecast sandstorm.
If it wasn't for that sandstorm drying out the quicksand...
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I have a black Infinity G35.
Stupid 1%-er!!!!
She had a black BMW--- very close looking to my car---OK---not that close...but close enough.
Shut the front door. You were trying to car jack her.
I quickly and repeatedly starting apologizing to this poor Lady---pointing at my car and saying----see, our cars look alike.
No they don't. Not even close.
Here's the thing--- I truly believe that if this lady had a gun in her purse or near by---she may have used it because she was that terrified.
I would have.
I could not imagine if that happen and she put a hole right in my head.... what would the hell would my family have thought? Hopefully a great detective would have figured out I had a brain fart.
No. The detective would have said, "attempted car jacking" or something like that. Nobody gives a shit about your stupid "brain fart".
This is a story of why a gun would have been good but could have been bad.
Yeah, one less Obama voter.
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Most. Awesome. Thread. EVER.
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
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what would the hell would my family have thought?
I just noticed the above after reading EC's post. Is Trumad the one that likes the non-prescription pharmaceuticals? If so, the family may have thought that it was a drug deal gone bad.
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trumad (31,862 posts)
17. This was broad daylight---in a very busy parking lot.
i had literally 20 steps to my car from the ATM.
If I get mugged in that situation--- well geez...
Robberies NEVER happen in broad daylight. ::)
We had a man who was shot and killed right out front of a Wells Fargo, at a very busy intersection, during broad daylight. Shut your damn mouth fool.
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Obama spoke.
Obama lied.
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I was once shot in the ass with a BB gun.
It could have broken the skin and caused a very bad infection.
(http://sidesalad.net/archives/ChevyChaseJohnCandyVacationRollercoasterBBGun.JPG)
I once shot my sister in the ass with a BB gun, my Dad proceeded to beat beat my ass with a belt.
I could have died.
But he convinced me that I needed to treat my older sister with a little more respect.
*True story