The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: dandi on June 03, 2012, 12:06:04 PM
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First of all, every time i see a DUmmy post "tee hee" it makes me want to drink a bottle of Drano. Or give them a Drano I.V. Anything to remove the idiocy from my mind.
Lionessa (1,957 posts)
Tee hee, tee hee, tee hee. One person at a time, better than a kick in ass.
So I have to tell you all what happened yesterday.
Brief backtrack for those that don't read my posts, I'm essentially homeless, living in a 5X8 utility trailer I've somewhat outfitted. Been traveling here and there trying to either find a job or a place that might support re-starting my biz. I am currently in AZ and to date the only people who have ever offered me safe parking, an electric plug-in, and access to water and toilet have been wingers, not just repubs, but wingers or real close to wingers.
Right now I'm in the back yard of a man who works at night and usually I come in from my trailer and have coffee and cigs with him when he returns from night shift and again before he leaves in the evening and we chat. Of course I'm quite the chatter myself so usually in the 2-3 hours spread throughout the morning and the evening, I'll get to talking about what I've been doing and as you can imagine, being I'm pretty focused on politics these days, I get the conversation to head that way. And then the fun begins. For the most part of course he just argues and whatnot, but I must be getting through at least a little, and here's how I know....
Yesterday he came in from night shift followed by a doctor's visit. I'll use my handle here in lieu of my actual name when quoting.
"Well, dayamn, Lionessa, I mean just dayamn!" he says as he plops himself into his kitchen chair.
"Hard night?" I ask as I settled in across the table from him and began to roll a cigarette.
"Not just that," he groaned, "the doctor's office kept me waiting for f'ing ever!!" He lit the cigarette he pulled out of his pack, reached over and lit mine before getting up to make a pot of coffee. "Yeah, yeah," he says, "had to wait in that office forever."
He stops in the middle of the kitchen with the coffee can held limply in one hand and starts grinning from ear to ear and his clear blue eyes start twinkling with mischief.
"Okay, WTF?!' I ask.
"Nothin', nothin' at all," he says and turns to attend the coffee, but he keeps looking over his shoulder at me and grinning. Once the coffee is dripping he returns to his chair, "yep, so I'm settin' there and, y'know that line of news at the bottom of the screen?, well, it was crawling across the bottom of the waiting room tv telling us that the landfill search for that little girl was 75% complete with no body found while the newsgal was talking about the wars, and this jerk next to me says, 'what a f'ing waste of money, looking for that little (insert racial slur here)', and man o MAN.. "
So I'm sort of holding my breath, I was hopeful because I knew I heard the word 'jerk' so I'm ever so hopeful he isn't about to tell me how they became fast friends in their agreement of such nonsense.....
He contnues, "y'know, Lionessa, I told him, I f'ing told him at the top of my lungs, 'Yeah, right, like spending all that on those wars isn't a waste! I'll take them spending that money here on our people on our needs before all those wars anyday! She's was one of our children fer krisesakes!', and you know what that f'er STFU and his wife was grinning from ear to ear!"
He keeps mumbling, "Dumb f'er. ... asshole...dumbass... made his wife happy to see him cut down...." He continues to mumble like this a few more minutes and he's staring me right in the eyes, that mischievous twinkle returning,... "yeah, I'm going have to throw your ass out.... This just won't do.... yep gonna throw your everlovin' ass out if keep getting into my head like that." Chuckling he heads to the coffee pot, gets two mugs, and pours us each a cup.
Maybe there's hope after all.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002758311
Not only is it a shitty Bouncy, but she's apparently oblivious to the irony that not only does the Obamessiah's economy have her living in a U-Haul, the only charitable people who will help her are Conservatives. The very people she claims to be "converting".
:mental:
Predictable responses:
Response to Lionessa (Original post)
Sat Jun 2, 2012, 07:04 PM
niyad (19,205 posts)
1. you made my day with this post, keep up the good work
Mother Of Four (1,319 posts)
2. Keep it up, it will have a ripple effect.
It's amazing, like
bbgrunt (3,630 posts)
4. well done. While I'm sad to think that all your offers for
encampment help come from wingers, I'm glad you're out there taming them like a secret emissary.
Lionessa (1,957 posts)
7. I think there is a reason for this,
I've determined that it's because the wingers find out pretty quick I'm a progressive with a crass attitude and big mouth, so they don't find me sexually attractive at all within about an hour, but I'm a hoot to say the least, and hence it works out. Men of my same persuasion just immediately go to the idea of dating and me moving into their bedrooms instead of my trailer, and won't let go which I'm just not all about being homeless and all, seems I need to get back on my feet before I go offering myself to anyone, .... anyway,...
women are understandably suspicious regardless of political persuasion.
So there you have my entirely unscientific opinion on that.
Let me get this straight, conservative men are turned off by you so they decide to let you live in their driveway, while liberal "men" want to jump your bones but you can't because you're homeless...or something...
This is just too much nausea-inducing crazy for me to dwell on.
joshcryer (34,357 posts)
8. Lovely post. If you're not a writer, please consider taking it up.
I see talent there as you related the story to us.
Wonderful story, too, thanks for sharing.
I hope that was sarcasm.
babylonsister (139,826 posts)
10. I SO enjoyed this!! YAY!!!!! Thanks!!! nt
Response to Lionessa (Original post)
Sun Jun 3, 2012, 10:54 AM
JNelson6563 (22,894 posts)
20. Oh well done!
Bravo!
Looks like the Conversion Bouncy is making a comeback.
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Lionessa? I thought Lionessa was the big-breasted lesbian teaching assistant who likes to get high before grading papers. When did she move into a U-haul and begin peddling her ass in exchange for cigarettes?
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That isn't worthy of a bong. Someone needs to show her how to make a good bouncy. There was nothing in there about a big round of applause, and how she knows she converted people while she walked out the door.
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All I got out of that :bouncy: was Republicans practice what they preach and help others while leftists leave you on your own and would rather the Government help.
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Lionessa? I thought Lionessa was the big-breasted lesbian teaching assistant who likes to get high before grading papers. When did she move into a U-haul and begin peddling her ass in exchange for cigarettes?
The big breasted drunk teacher is, La Lioness Priyanka. This moonbat is simply Lionessa.
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The repug gets the applause, back slaps, and high fives for behavior influenced by the DUmmy? Not technically a conversion bouncy, more like a Munchausens by proxy but with politics bouncy.
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What's with the dumb f-ing "accent" she's writing into the bouncy? I'm starting to think this bitch isn't even in Arizona. Fer? Are you freaking kidding me? No matter where you go in Arizona, it's full of transplants --- mostly from California.
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What's with the dumb f-ing "accent" she's writing into the bouncy? I'm starting to think this bitch isn't even in Arizona. Fer? Are you freaking kidding me? No matter where you go in Arizona, it's full of transplants --- mostly from California.
Implants, too, if I read Big Dog correctly.
Lionessa? You're not Holden Caulfield. I knew Holden Caufield, and you're no Holden Caulfield. When you started rolling the cigarette I think my eyes had a view of my optic nerves.
"quite the chatterbox"? Where did you learn to write, overeager-college-sophomores-r-us.com? Babe, don't try to publish, you'll only hurt yourself.
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I am having a hard time with a DUmmy who is homeless in this 0bama economy, who freely admits that the only charity she can find comes from conservatives, has the audacity to ridicule the hand that feeds her. That isn't a bouncy, it's something else, something far stupider and bereft of self-awareness. We need a neologism for that.
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All I got out of that :bouncy: was Republicans practice what they preach and help others while leftists leave you on your own and would rather the Government help.
Nailed it, Bally. ^5