The Conservative Cave

The Bar => The Lounge => Topic started by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on May 10, 2012, 02:25:06 PM

Title: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on May 10, 2012, 02:25:06 PM
Atlanta, GA -- Following years of controversy the pill RU-Dun is finally making its way to pharmacy shelves after the FDA gave its final approval this past Mardi Gras.

Originally formulated to euthanize stray cats, RU-Dun is being hailed as a victory for women to seeking control their reproductive freedom. RU-Dun is seen as a way out of those awkward, early morning introductions to his family after a night in their basement.

“Women need this,” said Diane Muffbacher, the manufacturer’s spokesperson. “Just because you wake-up next to someone that enthusiastically shows off his Wrestle-Mania ticket stub collection doesn’t mean a woman should have to pay for that mistake for the rest of her life.”

“This is for those women who might otherwise be trapped in relationships trying to support a mullet and an ’86 Camaro.”

One RU-Dun user echoed her sentiments, “I can’t tell you how many times I’ve woken-up with a taste in my mouth akin to cheap broccoli cheese soup only to realize, ‘Oh my God! He took me to TGI Friday’s.’”

But many have been critical, believing that proclamations of love are still valid, even if made between bouts of tequila-induced vomiting.

Others watching the controversy suggested Notatol, the birth control pill that immediately causes a headache. Still others suggested the responsibility must be shared between men and women citing new research into a male libido dampening pill that makes a woman’s thighs appear 50 pounds heavier
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: Gina on May 10, 2012, 02:54:59 PM
Quote
“Women need this,” said Diane Muffbacher, the manufacturer’s spokesperson. “Just because you wake-up next to someone that enthusiastically shows off his Wrestle-Mania ticket stub collection doesn’t mean a woman should have to pay for that mistake for the rest of her life.”

WoW.  A mistake is a baby?  :(
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on May 10, 2012, 02:57:11 PM
WoW.  A mistake is a baby?  :(

BNN = Bunny News Network
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: Kyle Ricky on May 10, 2012, 03:02:01 PM
Why does that article look like something the Onion would publish?  :rofl:
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: Celtic Rose on May 10, 2012, 03:05:06 PM
Why does that article look like something the Onion would publish?  :rofl:

Because it is from the Bunny News Network, the "creative" newssource created by one if our members :D
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: njpines on May 10, 2012, 03:06:35 PM
Why does that article look like something the Onion would publish?  :rofl:

The BNN is funnier and much more creative!  :-)
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: JohnnyReb on May 10, 2012, 03:10:36 PM
The military needs to add this to the mashed potatoes....along with the saltpeter.

Now if they were to get mixed up and add spanish fly instead of RU-Dun, that would make a mess.You'd have a bunch of soldiers trying to stuff wet noodles up wildcats asses.









Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: obumazombie on May 10, 2012, 03:51:40 PM
I see a lot of women with mulatto babies, and no father around. The unsaid hangs very heavily in the air.
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: JohnnyReb on May 10, 2012, 04:03:30 PM
I see a lot of women with mulatto babies, and no father around. The unsaid hangs very heavily in the air.

You know, for 40 or 50 years I had blacks (and liberals too of course) telling me how slave owners were raping their black women. Like you, I see and know of a lot of mulatto babies these days. I happen to know how a few of them came to be. The white girls/women were trading sex for drugs. They and their babies get on medicaid and other government freebies that we taxpayers have to pay for so it's a small price to pay for their drug habit.

That got me to rethink the whole slave owner raping our women thing. Maybe they weren't raping those slave women. The slave women back then were doing exactly what these white girls/women are doing today, trading sex for favors or something they wanted.
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on May 10, 2012, 04:05:08 PM
You two really know how to drag down a humor thread.
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: Eupher on May 10, 2012, 04:36:48 PM
Snugs, just where in the hell did you come up with the "woke up with a taste in the mouth akin to cheap broccoli cheese soup"?

Never mind! I don't wanna know!  :rotf:
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on May 10, 2012, 04:42:29 PM
Snugs, just where in the hell did you come up with the "woke up with a taste in the mouth akin to cheap broccoli cheese soup"?

Never mind! I don't wanna know!  :rotf:

I just write what the voices tell me.
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: Eupher on May 10, 2012, 04:43:52 PM
I just write what the voices tell me.

I believe that. Fervently.
Title: Re: BNN: Morning-after Pill Due to Hit Pharmacies by Week’s End
Post by: obumazombie on May 10, 2012, 07:35:00 PM
You two really know how to drag down a humor thread.
There once was a man named Barak...
Humor ridiculous speed, engage !