The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: BannedFromDU on February 14, 2012, 05:36:32 PM
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unionworks
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What kind of beans
... give you the worst gas? I am doing research for those occasions when I may intentionally want to pass as much gas as possible, such as leaving an asshole boss a present when he is out of his office,. Or infiltrating right wing meetings/speeches. I have tried navy beans and am looking to broaden my flatulence vocabulary. Suggestions?
Well, you already post on DU...that's flatulent enough. (http://www.democraticunderground.com/101852737)
No comment necessary. Most qualified, educated workers seek to improve their work productivity. Union monkeys want to fart, basically. This is proof.
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How old is this primitive , six ?
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Another fine example of the liberal left and their motto; "free speech for me, but not for thee".
Scratch a liberal, find a fascist.
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Great Northern beans do the trick for me. I like to eat a load of them before a union meeting. :lmao:
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unionworks? thats his name?
Oxymoron.
There's an old joke. Never buy a union made gun. It doesn't work and you can't fire it.
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Some of my old college buddies swear by Taco Bell and its impact on fart volume. Not necessarily stink factor. Yeah, probably TMI, but we're here to help the DUmmies, right?
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He should become an airline stewardman. I've read they know all the tricks.
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Didn't he learn anything from St. Patty's Day? It's boiled beef and cabbage.
Oh, and you're a putz. I hope you shit your drawers.
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The classic fart scene from Blazing Saddles comes to mind...
[youtube=425,350]R6dm9rN6oTs[/youtube]
"I'd say you had enough!"
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Another fine example of the liberal left and their motto; "free speech for me, but not for thee".
Scratch a liberal, find a fascist.
A stinking fascist. :thatsright:
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Well, if he is going for open sewer oh my god did that smell really come from your ass type stink, I'd say three or four budweisers and a meal at Steak 'n Shake ought to set him right up. I actually had a dog get up and leave the room after that one hit. I resorted to wearing my gas mask for a few minutes.
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Pinto beans with beer and pickled eggs on the side.
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I actually had a dog get up and leave the room after that one hit.
If man's best friend can't bear to stay around, you should be registered as a chemical weapon by the US Army.
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If man's best friend can't bear to stay around, you should be registered as a chemical weapon by the US Army.
I had a female Bassett hound that could roll your eyes back in your head with her SBD's.
Some were so bad, SHE LEFT the room first! :lmao:
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I had a female Bassett hound that could roll your eyes back in your head with her SBD's.
Some were so bad, SHE LEFT the room first! :lmao:
When I was about 12 or 13, there was this one time that my mother made pork chops with sauerkraut. This was before I started to like kraut. Anyway, my brother and I gave our kraut to our Siberian Husky. That next morning/day, it was eye-watering to be near the dog, his farts were that bad.
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All Y'all are full of shit. :tongue:
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Poor Marines can be written up if they fart near a Muslim. Yup directive says that the Muslims complain about our GI's farting in their vicinity. Muslims do fart but because of their diet it is just a gentle whiff with no lingering after effects, They say, but pork farts from our troops leave them inconsolable.
Darn the worse farts are from the Asians that eat Kimchee, lord that is nothing as bad as having to stand 10 hours next to someone that eats it every day. Smell comes out their pours when they sweat or speak to you from 3 feet away.
Wine Os's that drink that Thunder Bird 24/7------better a quick fart that goes away then to be stuck on a 8 hour flight next to them. No amount of less then 4 baths will take away that smell and the clothing reeks of it also.
Farts are just a normal behavior for people and animals, the toxicity comes from the diet, anyone remember what happens when a milk fed baby is introduced to Gerber strained meat???? Nothing like a year old baby that on introduction lets out its first meat fart, scares the kid and makes the diaper changer cry.
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How old is this primitive , six ?
42. you have to remember...
when it comes to liberals, you take how old they act and multiply it by 7 to get their real age
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to the OP:
I heard drinking three bottles of Dran-O work well...
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Guiness and a greasy hamburger, or bratwurst with kraut.
I swear you could SEE the cloud floating when I launched one of those. Had the guys in Maneuvering reaching for EAB's (Emergency Air Breathing masks.)
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Go with castor beans, DUmmie. If you can't get them, and since they aren't true beans anyway, you could always go with raw kidney beans, it just takes a lot more of them to have the desired effect (That is, the effect I desire they have on you).
:taps:
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I don't know why but I alnost never get gas. No matter what I eat or drink it dosen't seem to effect me and when it does it is controllable. I thoght other people were weird for having to fart all the time but it seems I am the odd one. Even ex girl friends would demand to know why I never fart.
Lamest X Man Ever.
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42. you have to remember...
when it comes to liberals, you take how old they act and multiply it by 7 to get their real age
Dog years.
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When I was about 12 or 13, there was this one time that my mother made pork chops with sauerkraut. This was before I started to like kraut. Anyway, my brother and I gave our kraut to our Siberian Husky. That next morning/day, it was eye-watering to be near the dog, his farts were that bad.
I have tears streaming :rofl:
Nyquil for some reason gives me loud foul smelling gas. I mean I have to walk outside at work to let them loose :lmao: No one thinks I work I am outside so much when I am sick :lmao:
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Farting should be kept to where it belongs...
...elevators and church.
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Nothing smells as bad as a brussel sprout fart...my boyfriend loved brussel sprouts, and I pay the price the next day. YUK.
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I cracked one in the car once.
Had to pull over and get out..
Not only that, it was a convertable, and the top was down.
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I cracked one in the car once.
Had to pull over and get out..
Not only that, it was a convertable, and the top was down.
:lmao:
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I would strongly suggest that the OP trying acting like a grown up instead of a prepubescent twit.
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I would strongly suggest that the OP trying acting like a grown up instead of a prepubescent twit.
Now THERE'S a "Plan A" that just begs to have a "Plan B" waiting in the wings.
:-)
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Farting should be kept to where it belongs...
...elevators and church.
I've got two more farting stories, which happened within a day of each other, back when I was in high school. At our small Catholic HS, we would all take our mid-terms and finals in the gym, which had been filled with desks for this purpose. One day during the January exams, one of my classmates let go with one that echoed throughout the gym. Though, some people didn't hear it right away--being a senior then, I knew exactly who had done it at the other corner of the gym. A cute freshman girl (her name was Julie) who was in my homeroom gave me one of these looks as if to ask, "WTF?" I leaned over as if to do a "one cheek sneak." The look on Julie's face turned to utter disgust . . .
. . . The very next day, I was sitting in roughly the same area for another final, and my brother was across the gym, a row or two away. Sure enough, I hear him drop one. His fellow students were picking their desks up and moving them as much as they could, to get away from him. As for my brother, . . . it was kinda obvious that he had let go, because all he did was sit there laughing silently.
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Farting should be kept to where it belongs...
...elevators and church.
And dutch ovens.
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There really is a little known trick when tooting in the tabernacle.
If one pays attention to detail, you'll often notice that when the sphincter sings,
the people next to offender pretend it never happened, and look straight ahead.
The folks on the side of them, generally will turn and look.
Here's the trick.
When the butt barks, quickly turn and look at your sister and scowl.
You know exactly who's going to get the blame for it. :lmao:
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There really is a little known trick when tooting in the tabernacle.
If one pays attention to detail, you'll often notice that when the sphincter sings,
the people next to offender pretend it never happened, and look straight ahead.
The folks on the side of them, generally will turn and look.
Here's the trick.
When the butt barks, quickly turn and look at your sister and scowl.
You know exactly who's going to get the blame for it. :lmao:
I do that to my hubby in church