The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: franksolich on December 21, 2011, 03:01:05 PM

Title: Oscar Wilde updates us on the War on Christmas
Post by: franksolich on December 21, 2011, 03:01:05 PM

http://www.democraticunderground.com/100252804

Oh my.

Oscar Wilde, the large-proboscised primitive "Cryano":

Quote

Cyrano (7,804 posts) Profile Journal Send DU Mail Ignore

Update on “The War on Christmas.”

The raid on the North Pole failed last night. Some say Prancer tipped everyone off and others say it was an elf.

The assault team didn’t even manage to blow up the sleigh, as the Pentagon has equipped it with stealth technology.

We have a robo call blitz scheduled for tomorrow night to inform the naughty and nice kids that they won’t be getting any presents this year. The targets are mostly the kids of people who don’t have a job. And the message states that the GOP has forced Santa to become a Muslim.

We only have three more days to win this year’s war, so we must all try harder.

If you see someone with Christmas packages, tell them that terrorists have planted bombs in presents.

If you see someone with a puppy that has a big red ribbon around its neck, tell them that the pup looks like it has rabies.

If you see someone carrying a Christmas tree, tell them that tree fires have gone up 80%.

Once again, only three days left. Get out there and fight the good fight against Santa, Christmas and God.

Now, after copying-and-pasting Oscar's initial wordage, I find the rest of the campfire dreadfully dull.

<<but never wastes a copy-and-paste job.

Title: Re: Oscar Wilde updates us on the War on Christmas
Post by: JohnnyReb on December 21, 2011, 04:47:37 PM

If I ain't happy and getting presents, ain't nobody gonna be happy and get presents.[DUmmie/scrooge/mode]

Christmas belonga us. :-)

Title: Re: Oscar Wilde updates us on the War on Christmas
Post by: Tess Anderson on December 21, 2011, 04:59:39 PM

Quote

Cyrano (7,804 posts) Profile Journal Send DU Mail Ignore

7. Keep your eyes open for three kings riding camels and bearing gifts.They're probably terrorists.

By the way, if these three kings saw a bright star in the east over Bethlehem, exactly where were they? Looking at a map, they were either in what is today Palestine, or somewhere out in the Mediteranian Sea.

So were the Magi ancient Palestinians, sailors, or what?

Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad satire.