The Conservative Cave
Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: franksolich on August 23, 2011, 07:34:14 PM
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http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=367x33171
Oh my.
Omaha Steve (1000+ posts) Mon Aug-22-11 07:22 PM
Original message
HELP WANTED
A local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the window saying:
HELP WANTED Must be a good typist and be good with a computer. Successful applicant must be bilingual. We are an Equal Opportunity Employer.
A short time later a lovely golden retriever dog trotted up to the window, saw the sign and went inside. He looked at the receptionist and wagged his tail, then walked over to the sign, looked at it, whined and pawed the air. The receptionist called the office manager. He was surprised, to say the least to see a canine applicant. However, the dog looked determined, so he led him into the office.
Inside, the dog jumped up on a chair and stared at the manager expectantly. The manager said, "I can't hire you. The sign says you must be able to type." The dog jumped down, went to the typewriter and proceeded to quickly type a perfect business letter. He took out the page and trotted over to the manager, gave it to him, then jumped back up on the chair.
The manager was stunned, but told the dog, "That was fantastic, but I'm sorry. The sign clearly says that whoever I hire has to be good with a computer."
The dog jumped down again, went to the computer and proceeded to demonstrate his expertise with various programs, produced a sample spreadsheet and database, then presented them to the manager.
The manager was dumbfounded! He said to the dog, "Hey, I realize that you are a very intelligent applicant and have fantastic talent, but you're a dog -- no way could I hire you."
The dog jumped down and went to the sign in the window and pointed his paw at the words, "Equal Opportunity Employer."
The exasperated manager said, "Yes, I know what the sign says. But the sign also says you have to be bilingual."
The dog looked him straight in the eye and said, "Meow!!!"
My fellow Nebraskan's got to do something about livening up the labor forum on Skins's island.
Ever since Mrs. Alfred Packer went away from the cooking and baking forum, making it wither away, I've been scouting around for a new favorite forum for comedic material.
By the way, of all the primitives on Skins's island, my fellow Nebraskan's in the best situation to know who franksolich is in real life, provided his memory's long enough.
Over the weekend, there occurred one of those meetings where a light of recognition blinked in a stranger's eye, "Oh, you're the deaf guy who got lost over there [i.e., the socialist paradises of the workers and peasants], and just 'evaporated' for a couple of years, and then came back."
That's not quite the way it was, but memory is fallible, and it after all was 15, 16 years ago.
If Omaha Steve plumbs his memory--it's not in the internet, as the Omaha World-Herald wasn't on the internet yet; however one can find it in a very thick file in the morgues of that newspaper--surely he might remember who franksolich is; I was in the pages of that newspaper often enough, at the time.
That is, unless my fellow Nebraskan's fried his brains with drugs.
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HELP WANTED Must be a good typist and be good with a computer. Successful applicant must be bilingual. We are an Equal Opportunity Employer.
How can you be an Equal Opportunity Employer yet exclude people who only speak English in an English speaking Country?
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How can you be an Equal Opportunity Employer yet exclude people who only speak English in an English speaking Country?
It's a position-specific requirement for the job, much as an engineering degree or knowing how to type would be in other positions.
It means "equal opportunity" for bi-linguals, not for all.
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It's a position-specific requirement for the job, much as an engineering degree or knowing how to type would be in other positions.
It means "equal opportunity" for bi-linguals, not for all.
I hate that, we're an English speaking Country and I get fed-up seeing the want ads saying must be Bilingual.
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Imagine living in a state that's 98 percent WHITE (and I mean WHITE) but having bilingual signs at Lowe's, TD Bank, etc.
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Imagine living in a state that's 98 percent WHITE (and I mean WHITE) but having bilingual signs at Lowe's, TD Bank, etc.
:banghead:
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:lmao: :rotf: :lmao: :rotf: :lmao: :rotf:
That, actually, was pretty funny IMO.
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Imagine living in a state that's 98 percent WHITE (and I mean WHITE) but having bilingual signs at Lowe's, TD Bank, etc.
And sometimes I can actually find things quicker in Spanish because the English is minimized or more difficult to read on most signs now. Think of it as a subliminal learning experience, amigo. :whistling: Be happy it isn't Chinese (yet).
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Canada, by law, has signs in French hundreds of miles from the nearest frog.
Cabada treats frogs more gently than spotted owls.