The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on June 22, 2011, 02:17:47 PM

Title: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on June 22, 2011, 02:17:47 PM
Taverner wants corporate America to give him a job where he can show up late, be stoned and not be expected to perform.

He is frustrated.

As his demands go unmet he wants Washington to fund the loss of pay.

He is yet again frustrated

He expects the people of America to rise up and secure his demands for him

He is still frustrated

He expects his fellow liberals to aid in his call for revolution

Why is he even bothering?



So as his frustrations continue to mount he will soon reach critical mass. Everyone will have shut him out. No one will listen to him. It will have to be a revolution of 1 and then they will learn their lesson. He'll show them. He'll show them all!

HOW MUCH LONGER UNTIL TAVERNER SNAPS: (a week, 3 months, a year, etc)

WHAT WILL HIS TARGET BE: (government office, retail store, conservative celebrity, his left foot, etc)

METHOD OF ACTING OUT: (self-immolation gone horribly awry, shooting spree, mail bomb, backpack full of pot left in public but he meant to leave a bomb instead and timer goes off when he gets back to his basement--er--HQ, intercepted by cops before anything happens)
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: dandi on June 22, 2011, 02:22:18 PM
Spontaneous combustion...

 :-)
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: franksolich on June 22, 2011, 02:23:16 PM
I dunno how he'll snap--it's inevitable that he's going to snap--but I bet about the same time nominations for top primitives are solicited.

And that's in late November, so, say about five and a half months, he'll snap.

But being generally incompetent and worthless, he'll be his biggest victim.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Karin on June 22, 2011, 03:08:45 PM
He requires pot in particular to quell his rage problem, which gives him a chance to count to 10.  So, my guess is the snapping will involve assaulting a cop, who took his goods away.  I don't think he has the wherewithall for anything more dramatic.  Timing?  One to two months. 
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: ScubaGuy on June 22, 2011, 03:17:46 PM
As long as he has a pot supply it'll never happen.

He's just like the rest of them, all talk. 

Stick it to the man! Revolution Now! Take to the streets! General Strike!  Comes right down to it all those things require some level effort and it's a whole lot easier to post tough guy shit on DU and get stoned.

Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Skul on June 22, 2011, 03:29:54 PM
I dunno how he'll snap--it's inevitable that he's going to snap--but I bet about the same time nominations for top primitives are solicited.

And that's in late November, so, say about five and a half months, he'll snap.

But being generally incompetent and worthless, he'll be his biggest victim.
Carve that in stone by not nominating him at all.
The overwhelming rejection of his greatest tormentors, will be his down fall.

He snaps in five and a half months, and I'm sticking to it.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: compaqxp on June 22, 2011, 03:43:36 PM
He'll snap when a republican wins the 2012 election. The rest I'm unsure about.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: LC EFA on June 22, 2011, 04:22:27 PM
HOW MUCH LONGER UNTIL TAVERNER SNAPS:

Next republican POTUS.

WHAT WILL HIS TARGET BE: (government office, retail store, conservative celebrity, his left foot, etc)

Himself.

METHOD OF ACTING OUT:

UGP style body mods and pharmaceutical cocktails.

Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: catsmtrods on June 22, 2011, 05:24:36 PM
If he does snap he will beat his wife or girlfriend or a child. He don't want to get his ass kicked!
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: miskie on June 22, 2011, 05:52:43 PM
I am torn between him being an 'all talk no action' DUmmie and an ultramole. Either way, I suspect he will be banned before he 'snaps'
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: true_blood on June 22, 2011, 08:14:41 PM
HOW MUCH LONGER UNTIL TAVERNER SNAPS:
In about 3-4 months.

WHAT WILL HIS TARGET BE:
Himself.

METHOD OF ACTING OUT:
A pharmaceutical cocktail and alcohol concoction.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: USA4ME on June 22, 2011, 09:33:43 PM
He's always been an idiot, but lately he's been burning the candle at both ends.  I'd say at least by mid-July we'll see him burn out, but there won't be a snap.  Afterwards he'll be doing mindless rambling posts full of glom, doom, darkness, and despair like the bluegrass primitive, the sparkling husband primitive, and that Cleita primitive.

.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Evil_Conservative on June 22, 2011, 09:58:32 PM
July 4, 2011.

Too much American pride going on that day.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Chris_ on June 22, 2011, 10:01:02 PM
July 4, 2011.

Too much American pride going on that day.
Too soon.  Unless there was some massive OTC overdose.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Boudicca on June 22, 2011, 10:27:39 PM
If he does snap he will beat his wife or girlfriend or a child or his dog. He don't want to get his ass kicked!

There, fixed it fer ya! :-)
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Evil_Conservative on June 22, 2011, 10:53:36 PM
Too soon.  Unless there was some massive OTC overdose.

He could snap on the wrong person at a grocery store or Starbucks.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: BlueStateSaint on June 23, 2011, 04:01:55 PM
There, fixed it fer ya! :-)

Bou, I don't care what breed the dog is--it could be the most peaceful Golden Retriever ever, and the dog would bite his ass if he came at it.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Randy on June 23, 2011, 05:13:22 PM
Just before Christmas when the holiday black ass has a deep grip on him.

He won't do any acting out because he'll go from a stroke banging out his definitive  manifesto to post at the DUmp.

No tools other than a computer as just the thought of guns and explosives make him wee his thong.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: mamacags on June 23, 2011, 05:20:15 PM
I agree.  I pick December 15th.  10 days before Christmas.  Too much religious imagery, family, bills, and lack of illegal drugs in his system.  He will totally flame out on DU, then go to one of the splinter sites, then most likely end up dead by his own hand or in a hospital for a long stay.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: GOBUCKS on June 23, 2011, 05:23:40 PM
I would not make a guess without knowing the date when DOTY voting will close.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: franksolich on June 23, 2011, 06:55:35 PM
I would not make a guess without knowing the date when DOTY voting will close.

Monday, December 12, 2011 at 11:59 p.m. central time, 10:59 p.m. mountain time.

It's been on the calendar for a while.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: GOBUCKS on June 23, 2011, 07:33:26 PM
Monday, December 12, 2011 at 11:59 p.m. central time, 10:59 p.m. mountain time.

It's been on the calendar for a while.
All I see on the calendar (which I've never looked at before) is a bunch of birthdays. No DOTY info.
Maybe I'm not looking in the right place. It is solely the fault of George W. Bush.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: franksolich on June 23, 2011, 07:50:42 PM
All I see on the calendar (which I've never looked at before) is a bunch of birthdays. No DOTY info.
Maybe I'm not looking in the right place. It is solely the fault of George W. Bush.

No, on the Norwegian calendar here.

I had just put a big "X" on the date, so as to remind me.

I never put down information; I just put "X"s on the calendar that remind me I'm supposed to remember something.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: true_blood on June 23, 2011, 08:13:32 PM
He could snap on the wrong person at a grocery store or Starbucks.
I would love to see that! :-)
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: GOBUCKS on June 23, 2011, 08:20:47 PM
Regardless what may be going on in the world at that time, I expect the first ten days of December to be utter mayhem at the
DUmp. The DOTY award has received so much publicity over the past year or so, the days when a disorganized campaign, like
the one waged by Pam Dawson in 2009, or a non-campaign, like the one conducted by coach on behalf of proud2BDUmb in 2010, has no chance.

A least a half-dozen truly deranged and very active DUmmies want this win so badly they can taste it. It should be fascinating to watch the absurd behavior they'll be willing to use, to gain attention and to sabotage competitors. They'll have to walk a knife's edge, between a tombstone and Top DUmmy glory.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: true_blood on June 23, 2011, 08:22:04 PM
A least a half-dozen truly deranged and very active DUmmies want this win so badly they can taste it. It should be fascinating to watch the absurd behavior they'll be willing to use, to gain attention and to sabotage competitors. They'll have to walk a knife's edge, between a tombstone and Top DUmmy glory.
This I do agree with. It should be fun and entertaining as well.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Boudicca on June 24, 2011, 12:13:55 AM
Bou, I don't care what breed the dog is--it could be the most peaceful Golden Retriever ever, and the dog would bite his ass if he came at it.

 :-)
Maybe he'd kick the cat instead?

Although, I've got cats the dogs won't cross.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: BlueStateSaint on June 24, 2011, 04:19:29 AM
:-)
Maybe he'd kick the cat instead?

Although, I've got cats the dogs won't cross.

Oreo here fits that description (a cat that would beat up a dog).
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on October 12, 2011, 02:39:28 PM
bump
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Splashdown on October 12, 2011, 02:45:56 PM
[youtube=425,350]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4xU-rJNgoWU[/youtube]

I'm going with the greatest stick animation ever.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: delilahmused on October 12, 2011, 03:16:02 PM
He needs to pump out a good bouncie. It always makes them feel better to get pats on the back from their fellow moonbats for their superior intellect.

Cindie
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Odin's Hand on October 12, 2011, 03:22:28 PM
The more important question is: "How will he reconcile his dilemma of rotting away in a musty corner vs. capping some 'fundies?"

These withdrawal episodes have been a bitch on his volatility.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: DumbAss Tanker on October 12, 2011, 05:20:09 PM
He's headed for the ER on an overdose (Probably DOA), or the nut-house.  I give it three to nine months.
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Mr Mannn on October 12, 2011, 06:03:32 PM
Hmmm. Unemployed. Addicted to drugs.

likely he is already committing crimes to support his habit.

The snap will come in one of two ways.
1) criminal activity. He will hurt (maybe kill) someone.
2) He will snap at his dealer and get shot dead.

Timing? I will say right after he realizes the Occupy Wall Street has utterly failed. No free drugs.
The day he understand that, is the day he will snap.

Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: Duke Nukum on October 12, 2011, 07:08:29 PM
What kind of drugs does Taverner supposedly do? Doesn't he have any mellow ones?
Title: Re: BETTING POOL: when Taverner finally snaps
Post by: GOBUCKS on October 12, 2011, 07:33:37 PM
What kind of drugs does Taverner supposedly do? Doesn't he have any mellow ones?
In the past he's mentioned being addicted to morphine, and he's mentioned heroin. Once he just said narcotics.

He brags about how much weed he consumes.

From the nature of his posts, it sounds like he must have scored some PCP or maybe meth.
 
He's never mentioned how he gets the money for all these drugs, but he has discussed his chronic, long-term unemployment.