The Conservative Cave

Current Events => The DUmpster => Topic started by: dandi on June 18, 2011, 11:54:06 AM

Title: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: dandi on June 18, 2011, 11:54:06 AM
Bored with inventing new nicknames for Rethuglican politicians, DUmmies fall back to their second favorite pastime - attacking their children.

Quote
onehandle  (1000+ posts)      Sat Jun-18-11 11:44 AM
Original message
Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
 

'Newly-chinned abstinence spokesmodel Bristol Palin isn't so different from you and me! In fact, just like 80 percent of the U.S. population, she lost her virginity on a camping trip while drunk on wine coolers, according to her new memoir, Not Afraid of Life: My Journey So Far. Apparently she woke up unable to remember the event, and was reminded only by hearing her then-boyfriend Levi Johnston bragging about it to his friends on the phone. She confronted Johnston, and he promised that they wouldn't do it (sex) again until they were married.'

http://gawker.com/5813267/bristol-palin-lost-her-virgin...

Don't shoot the messenger.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=439x1321688


Quote
HopeHoops  (1000+ posts)      Sat Jun-18-11 11:45 AM
Response to Original message
3. Pretty classy for a Palin spawn.

Quote
onehandle  (1000+ posts)      Sat Jun-18-11 11:52 AM
Response to Reply #3
13. That was probably 'The Ritz' compared to her mom.
 I'm picturing a Frat lined up outside of a porta-potty

Quote
HopeHoops  (1000+ posts)      Sat Jun-18-11 11:54 AM
Response to Reply #13
15. Or up against the side of it.

Quote
blueknight (1000+ posts)        Sat Jun-18-11 11:51 AM
Response to Reply #5
9. why would we
 expect anything else? i mean, the classy bunch that they are...

Quote
SpiralHawk  (1000+ posts)     Sat Jun-18-11 11:51 AM
Response to Original message
11. This is sooo insightful
 Republicons will be reassured that their, um, 'Family Values'are -- as ever -- being acted out so, um, faithfully by their young'uns.

Bristol is a true exemplar of authentic Republicon Family Values. No arguing that point.

Quote
lunatica  (1000+ posts)        Sat Jun-18-11 11:52 AM
Response to Original message
12. Quoted right out of her own book
 What a role model

Quote
HipChick (1000+ posts)       Sat Jun-18-11 12:10 PM
Response to Original message
24. I call BS.. she was having sex with more than 1 guy at a time..
 Edited on Sat Jun-18-11 12:11 PM by HipChick
Since she hoped the baby wasn't Levi's...but why stop the Palin tradition of lying?..

Levi's sister a couple of years ago

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=...

Quote
joeybee12  (1000+ posts)      Sat Jun-18-11 12:31 PM
Response to Reply #34
36. She's more full of shit than her mother...nt

Quote
Tempest (1000+ posts)      Sat Jun-18-11 12:31 PM
Response to Original message
35. Bristol was a slut, everyone in Wasilla knew it
 
She was sleeping around on Levi and when she got pregnant she text to him "I prayed to god this baby wasn't yours".

 

 
 

 
   
 
 
 


 
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: BlueStateSaint on June 18, 2011, 11:57:40 AM
Typical lefty jealousy, as they wish that their boyfriends (both genders) would nail them on a camping trip.  Most boyfriends would gag at the stench, and wouldn't want to be in the same campground with them, to say nothng of the same tent.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: JohnnyReb on June 18, 2011, 12:03:00 PM
I'm afraid I'm probably like the DUmmies...I lost my virginity at a young age...and also like the DUmmies...I was alone. :lmao:
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: BEG on June 18, 2011, 12:05:55 PM
I lost mine in high school to my very first real boyfriend in the back seat of a VW bug, does it help if I ended up marrying him 5 years later and will be married to him for 25 years next January?
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: thelaughingman on June 18, 2011, 01:57:16 PM
Quote
In fact, just like 80 percent of the U.S. population, she lost her virginity on a camping trip while drunk on wine coolers

80% of the population lost their virginity while drunk on wine coolers while camping?
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: GOBUCKS on June 18, 2011, 02:00:08 PM
This thread has stevenumbers in a cold sweat.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: Celtic Rose on June 18, 2011, 02:01:27 PM
Wouldn't most DUmmies consider that rape if it happened to any other person?  I'll be honest, if I woke up and couldn't remember the night before and I found out that my boyfriend had sex with me for the first time, especially if I had been a virgin prior to that, I would probably consider it rape.  
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: franksolich on June 18, 2011, 02:03:42 PM
80% of the population lost their virginity while drunk on wine coolers while camping?

That statistic sort of freaked me out, too.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: Chris_ on June 18, 2011, 02:08:06 PM
I thought those were the family values that liberals celebrated... sticking it to the Man, tossing off the yoke of the warlike patriarchal society, and being a degenerate dirtbag all around. 
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: catsmtrods on June 18, 2011, 02:26:11 PM
This from the bunch that can identity 1000 crooked dicks?
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: miskie on June 18, 2011, 03:05:12 PM
I'm afraid I'm probably like the DUmmies...I lost my virginity at a young age...and also like the DUmmies...I was alone. :lmao:

BAZINGA !
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: redwhit on June 18, 2011, 03:18:00 PM
Wouldn't most DUmmies consider that rape if it happened to any other person?  I'll be honest, if I woke up and couldn't remember the night before and I found out that my boyfriend had sex with me for the first time, especially if I had been a virgin prior to that, I would probably consider it rape.  

That's what jumped out at me too.  Something doesn't seem quite right here.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: GOBUCKS on June 18, 2011, 03:22:29 PM
80% of the population lost their virginity while drunk on wine coolers while camping?
stevenumbers will be stopping at the wine shop on his way home from Cabela's.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: Skul on June 18, 2011, 06:55:21 PM
I lost mine in high school to my very first real boyfriend in the back seat of a VW bug, does it help if I ended up marrying him 5 years later and will be married to him for 25 years next January?
Yes it does.  h5
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: vesta111 on June 18, 2011, 07:41:54 PM
New Topic here------When was your first time with another person.   I have to include the gays in here to make it interesting.

Do anyone of us remember the name of the person we gave it up to ?????

Why is this so important that we have to think long and hard to remember other sexual encounters including the first time we made it with our mate of today, where and how did it happen, were we under a school bus, on the beach, perhaps in parents bed when they were on vacation???

Th first time for most anything is important at least to woman, men have many first and last times in their lives.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: Skul on June 18, 2011, 07:47:19 PM
New Topic here------When was your first time with another person.   I have to include the gays in here to make it interesting.

Do anyone of us remember the name of the person we gave it up to ?????

Why is this so important that we have to think long and hard to remember other sexual encounters
including the first time we made it with our mate of today, where and how did it happen, were we under a school bus, on the beach, perhaps in parents bed when they were on vacation???

Th first time for most anything is important at least to woman, men have many first and last times in their lives.
Why should we care.
It's a private issue.
DUmmies seem to think it important, therefore they catch the dickens.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: GOBUCKS on June 18, 2011, 08:58:59 PM
Quote
I lost mine in high school to my very first real boyfriend in the back seat of a VW bug
Back seat of a bug? Wow! A pair of dwarf circus clowns would have trouble doing that.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: thundley4 on June 18, 2011, 09:07:41 PM
Back seat of a bug? Wow! A pair of dwarf circus clowns would have trouble doing that.

She is very flexible.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: thelaughingman on June 18, 2011, 09:32:52 PM
She is very flexible.

I think I just orgasmed.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: thelaughingman on June 18, 2011, 09:37:44 PM
I lost mine in high school to my very first real boyfriend in the back seat of a VW bug,

Please elaborate.   :naughty:  The public demands details, details, details!

Quote
does it help if I ended up marrying him 5 years later and will be married to him for 25 years next January?

NOOOO!!!  You do NOT look like you've been married 25 years.  15 tops.  Seriously.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: dandi on June 20, 2011, 09:50:14 AM
I find it interesting that some people screw up when they are young (me) and somehow manage to grow up by learning from how they screwed up when they were young (most definitely me), but the DUmbasses can't see past that.  Could it be that they themselves have never grown up?  Could it be that they have some genetic flaw that prevents them from ever learning from their mistakes?  Or could it be that they're jealous because they lost theirs to a rough trick named "Jim"?

 :shucks:
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: jukin on June 20, 2011, 10:02:47 AM
Wine Coolers??

Sounds like the 70s to me and that the DUchebag probably had to get the guy drunk on some Boones Farm to do the nasty with it.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: IassaFTots on June 20, 2011, 10:11:02 AM
Wine Coolers??

Sounds like the 70s to me and that the DUchebag probably had to get the guy drunk on some Boones Farm to do the nasty with it.

Wine Coolers were in the '80's.  Bartles and Jaymes anyone???   :-) 

I preferred California Coolers, cuz they came in a 2 liter.   :-)
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: delilahmused on June 20, 2011, 12:17:25 PM
Wine Coolers were in the '80's.  Bartles and Jaymes anyone???   :-) 

I preferred California Coolers, cuz they came in a 2 liter.   :-)

Annie Greensprings!

Cindie
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: SSG Snuggle Bunny on June 20, 2011, 12:25:55 PM
REMEMBER KIDS: We're the perverts because we have an unhealthy obsession with the extra-marital doings of a 46-year old congressman who just found out he's going to be a father.

Try to keep your maladjusted minds focused on under-aged girls where it belongs.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: Karin on June 20, 2011, 12:33:24 PM
Yeah, and BEG's husband is tall, too, so that took extra special talent.   :lmao:

I did it in a Bug as well.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: BEG on June 20, 2011, 12:36:12 PM
Back seat of a bug? Wow! A pair of dwarf circus clowns would have trouble doing that.

Desperate people do desperate things. I could tell you all about leaving prints on the hood of his bug once, if you are interested.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: dandi on June 20, 2011, 12:37:16 PM
Desperate people do desperate things. I could tell you all about leaving prints on the hood of his bug once, if you are interested.

What kind of prints?

 :naughty:
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: GOBUCKS on June 20, 2011, 12:42:10 PM
Desperate people do desperate things. I could tell you all about leaving prints on the hood of his bug once, if you are interested.

Now that's believable. A literal bouncy tale[sic].
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: BEG on June 20, 2011, 12:46:38 PM
What kind of prints?

 :naughty:

Probably what you are imagining.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: BEG on June 20, 2011, 12:47:54 PM
Please elaborate.   :naughty:  The public demands details, details, details!

NOOOO!!!  You do NOT look like you've been married 25 years.  15 tops.  Seriously.

I got married when I was 20.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: BEG on June 20, 2011, 12:50:52 PM
Yeah, and BEG's husband is tall, too, so that took extra special talent.   :lmao:

I did it in a Bug as well.

I'm talented like that.  :-)
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: delilahmused on June 20, 2011, 12:54:27 PM
Quote
SpiralHawk  (1000+ posts)     Sat Jun-18-11 11:51 Response to Original message
11. This is sooo insightful
 Republicons will be reassured that their, um, 'Family Values'are -- as ever -- being acted out so, um, faithfully by their young'uns.

Bristol is a true exemplar of authentic Republicon Family Values. No arguing that point.

You people are so ****ing vile. And, as usual you have a warped idea of what family values are. The most important value ISN'T keeping your children (or other family members or even ourselves) from making mistakes or not living up to our values. ALL people fail to live up to them sometimes. But having a code gives us a path to come back to despite straying now and then. And we all understand that one of the times people stray the most is when they're young. It's a normal part of growing up.

Some of us stray further or make really big mistakes, but FAMILY VALUES also says we love and support our family members and help them when they fall. In Bristol's case that means you've taught your daughter that LIFE is valued and no "mistake" is worth killing a baby over. It also means accepting personal responsibility for her choices. Bristol did that by finding a way to support herself and her baby boy. People make fun of her because of the way she's chosen to do it but she does it anyway. And she courageously, publicly, puts herself out there as an example of what NOT to do even though faces criticism from both sides.

Did she have help from her family? Of course she did. And I'd like to point out that at that time they were a middle class family with a middle class income. I don't know anyone in my circle, regardless of income, who wouldn't support their child. More important than not making mistakes, which is an absolutely absurd premise on your part, family values means you love your child. If we've taught them well, they'll handle whatever situation they're in with responsibility and dignity. As parents our job is love our children and help them without blunting consequences of their bad choices. These are the things that show a person's character.

Cindie
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: GOBUCKS on June 20, 2011, 01:02:01 PM
Sometimes you have to do whatever it takes to make ends meet.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: FiddyBeowulf on June 20, 2011, 01:02:14 PM
Wouldn't most DUmmies consider that rape if it happened to any other person?  I'll be honest, if I woke up and couldn't remember the night before and I found out that my boyfriend had sex with me for the first time, especially if I had been a virgin prior to that, I would probably consider it rape.  
But it does not meet the left's definition of "rape-rape".

Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: BEG on June 20, 2011, 01:05:20 PM
You people are so ****ing vile. And, as usual you have a warped idea of what family values are. The most important value ISN'T keeping your children (or other family members or even ourselves) from making mistakes or not living up to our values. ALL people fail to live up to them sometimes. But having a code gives us a path to come back to despite straying now and then. And we all understand that one of the times people stray the most is when they're young. It's a normal part of growing up.

Some of us stray further or make really big mistakes, but FAMILY VALUES also says we love and support our family members and help them when they fall. In Bristol's case that means you've taught your daughter that LIFE is valued and no "mistake" is worth killing a baby over. It also means accepting personal responsibility for her choices. Bristol did that by finding a way to support herself and her baby boy. People make fun of her because of the way she's chosen to do it but she does it anyway. And she courageously, publicly, puts herself out there as an example of what NOT to do even though faces criticism from both sides.

Did she have help from her family? Of course she did. And I'd like to point out that at that time they were a middle class family with a middle class income. I don't know anyone in my circle, regardless of income, who wouldn't support their child. More important than not making mistakes, which is an absolutely absurd premise on your part, family values means you love your child. If we've taught them well, they'll handle whatever situation they're in with responsibility and dignity. As parents our job is love our children and help them without blunting consequences of their bad choices. These are the things that show a person's character.

Cindie

H5
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: NHSparky on June 20, 2011, 01:46:08 PM
stevenumbers will be stopping at the wine shop on his way home from Cabela's.

Someone needs to tell him that Bartel's and James' aren't sold at the local 7/11 anymore.  These days it's the "hard" lemonades and shit like that.

Personally, I don't know of too many people who would ADMIT to having drunk a wine cooler after about 1994 or so.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: dandi on June 20, 2011, 01:58:51 PM
Probably what you are imagining.

Probably, but you said you would tell.....   :popcorn:
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: miskie on June 20, 2011, 02:56:15 PM
Wine Coolers were in the '80's.  Bartles and Jaymes anyone???   :-) 

I preferred California Coolers, cuz they came in a 2 liter.   :-)

There was a time Purple Passion came in a plastic 2 liter soda bottle - with 'made from substandard grapes' in the fine print at the bottom.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: IassaFTots on June 20, 2011, 02:59:18 PM
There was a time Purple Passion came in a plastic 2 liter soda bottle - with 'made from substandard grapes' in the fine print at the bottom.

Yup.  I recall that as well.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: DumbAss Tanker on June 20, 2011, 05:40:47 PM
Wouldn't most DUmmies consider that rape if it happened to any other person?

You would think so, wouldn't you?  Their hypocrisy and misogyny is truly appalling.

Quote
I'll be honest, if I woke up and couldn't remember the night before and I found out that my boyfriend had sex with me for the first time, especially if I had been a virgin prior to that, I would probably consider it rape.


And rightly so.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: Duke Nukum on June 20, 2011, 10:37:58 PM
So, Anthony Weiner = DUmp hero
Bristol Palin = slut

Stay classy, DU.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: GOBUCKS on June 20, 2011, 11:08:01 PM
Bristol is in a tiny minority, like Ashlee Simpson, who's had facial surgery that was immensely successful.
 
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: Ralph Wiggum on June 21, 2011, 08:58:35 AM
80% of the population lost their virginity while drunk on wine coolers while camping?

Just like the DUmmies' claim that 10% of the population is gay.  Or in their terms, GLBTQI. :whatever:
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: Ralph Wiggum on June 21, 2011, 09:00:36 AM
Someone needs to tell him that Bartel's and James' aren't sold at the local 7/11 anymore.  These days it's the "hard" lemonades and shit like that.

Personally, I don't know of too many people who would ADMIT to having drunk a wine cooler after about 1994 or so.

And if a guy ever admits drinking one at all, that raises questions about their manhood.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: IassaFTots on June 21, 2011, 09:00:58 AM
Just like the DUmmies' claim that 10% of the population is gay.  Or in their terms, GLBTQI. :whatever:

I still don't get that Q. 
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: Ralph Wiggum on June 21, 2011, 09:03:20 AM
I still don't get that Q. 

Questioning. :mental:
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: IassaFTots on June 21, 2011, 09:05:23 AM
Questioning. :mental:

I know what it stands for, and I still don't understand it.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: Ralph Wiggum on June 21, 2011, 09:06:25 AM
I know what it stands for, and I still don't understand it.

I think it applies well to Stevie Numbers.  He's constantly questioning why he can't get laid.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: FiddyBeowulf on June 21, 2011, 09:07:09 AM
I know what it stands for, and I still don't understand it.
As in: Seems a bit redundant?
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: IassaFTots on June 21, 2011, 09:11:22 AM
I think it applies well to Stevie Numbers.  He's constantly questioning why he can't get laid.

Now that makes sense. 
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: IassaFTots on June 21, 2011, 09:11:39 AM
As in: Seems a bit redundant?

Exactly.
Title: Re: Bristol Palin Lost Her Virginity in a Tent, Drunk on Wine Coolers
Post by: Celtic Rose on June 21, 2011, 09:17:53 AM
I know what it stands for, and I still don't understand it.

Supposedly it is for people who are questioning if they might be gay/bi/anything else.